This weekend only folks! THIS WEEKEND ONLY!

No mortgage payments for 6 months. $50k off.

What else could you possibly ask for?

Just like how people go to Costco to buy a 2000 pack of toilet paper and and cans of spam, you should be out scooping up an armload of these townhouses!

You’re going to slacking off this weekend once the economy recovers. And, when it does, traffic on 101 will come roaring back, giving your house an even more dynamic view.

Plan ahead… act now!

3160 RIDDLE Rd San Jose, CA 95117
Price: $499,000

Beds:     3
Baths:     2
Sq. Ft.:     1,248
$/Sq. Ft.:     $400
Lot Size:     7,956 Sq. Ft.
Property Type:    Detached Single Family
Style:    Ranch
Year Built:    1948
Stories:    1
View:    Neighborhood
Neighborhood:    Campbell
County:     Santa Clara
MLS#:     80825854
Source:     MLSListings
Status:     Pending Without Release
On Redfin:     101 days
Unsold in 90+ days
Fixer-upper
Close to Santa Row, Looking for opportunity here your chance with great potential Large Lot, need you touch if you are handy and make nice return on your investment. Close to Santa Row, Nice neighborhood. Must sell,

Burbed reader nomadic had this to say:

Here’s a “riddle” – why is this house in soft focus?  To hide its wrinkles?  And why only exterior shots?

Someone needs to snap this one up for the holidays – it’s close to “Santa Row!”  You can even see the dome of the theater behind it in street view.  They even put it on sale early, slashing the price by 1/3 since it was listed in August – wow, the price cuts were weekly throughout the month; if they kept going every week they’d be paying someone to take it off their hands by now.

Wow, someone clearly has been keeping tabs on this house! So many riddles, so little time!

Come on everyone… if this isn’t a Black Friday deal, I don’t know what is. If I were you, I’d scoop it up now, so that you don’t have to wait in line at 3am to buy this house. It’s not going to get any lower you know – just look at the large lot!

272 HEDGE Rd Menlo Park, CA 94025
Price: $995,000

Beds:     3
Baths:     2
Sq. Ft.:     1,720
$/Sq. Ft.:     $578
Lot Size:     6,350 Sq. Ft.
Property Type:    Attached Single Family
Style:    Ranch
Year Built:    1947
Stories:    1
Neighborhood:    Flood Park Area
County:     San Mateo
MLS#:     80844573
Source:     MLSListings
Status:     Active
On Redfin:     2 days
Located in a very private road in Suburban Park. The most sought after neighborhood in Menlo Park. Great for families with young children.

Well, nothing unusual here just your regular huge honkin’ 1700 sqft million dollar house. If anything, the house is a little cheap at just $578 per square foot. If it’s not $600+, it can be suspicious. And, it has great elementary schools. Heck, the current owner has a SMART car, so you know that this is a smart place to be.

Hey wait a sec… what’s going on in those picture? Let’s take a closer look:

Uh. Um.

I’m at a loss for words. Is this an example of having product placement in ads? Now that would be revolutionary!

Thanks to Burbed reader sw for this find.

2432 FORDHAM St East Palo Alto, CA 94303

Price: $429,900
Beds:     3
Baths:     2
Sq. Ft.:     1,650
$/Sq. Ft.:     $261
Lot Size:     5,000 Sq. Ft.
Age (Years):    57
Year Built:    1951
Type:    Detached Single Family
Stories:    1 Story
Neighborhood:    East of U.S. 101
County:     San Mateo
MLS#:     80812212
Source:     MLSListings
Status:     Active
On Redfin:     148 days
Unsold in 90+ days
Big house for two families!!!

The world knows that the Bay Area is famous for its entrepreneurial, can do spirit. And this house is the pinacle of this attitude. With a whopping 1,650 square feet, 3 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, this house can be a big house… for two families.

Just think of the awesome potential cash flow! You’d practically be living in this house for free – albeit with another family.

Hey future landlord… think you can beat having 14 people in a house? Come on! Go for it! I know you can do it!

10049 IMPERIAL Ave Cupertino, CA 95014
Price: $828,000

Beds:     2
Baths:     1
Sq. Ft.:     672
$/Sq. Ft.:     $1,232
Lot Size:     7,130 Sq. Ft.
Age (Years):    68
Year Built:    1940
Type:    Detached Single Family
Style:    Cottage/Bungalow
Stories:    1 Story
Neighborhood:    Cupertino
County:     Santa Clara
MLS#:     80823175
Source:     MLSListings
Status:     Active
On Redfin:     96 days
Unsold in 90+ days
MONTA VISTA BUNGALOW ZONED ML SOLD AS-IS TRUSTEE SALE. TOP CUPERTINO SCHOOLS. NEAR PARKS, DEEP CLIFF GOLF COURSE, DE ANZA, HWY 85 & 280. SHOW AFTER 4:30PM W/ 24 HOUR NOTICE.

More happy news for these glum times – $1232 per square foot. Woot!

This is exactly the kind of cheering up that people here in the Real Bay Area needed! After all, it’s Cupertino!

Oh but wait, it gets better! Let’s look at this amazing prime location:

Can you say easy access to shopping? I don’t know what kind of stores those are, but heck, they’re convenient. And look – you’ve got a neighbor who appreciates cars!

Win win win!

21950 MCCLELLAN Rd Cupertino, CA 95014
Price: $899,888

Beds:     3
Baths:     2
Sq. Ft.:     1,015
$/Sq. Ft.:     $887
Lot Size:     6,000 Sq. Ft.
Age (Years):    64
Year Built:    1944
Type:    Detached Single Family
Stories:    1 Story
View(s):    Neighborhood
Neighborhood:    Cupertino
County:     Santa Clara
MLS#:     80816064
Source:     MLSListings
Status:     Active
On Redfin:     130 days
Unsold in 90+ days
Charming home has Cupertino schools: Lincoln Elementary/ Kennedy Middle/ Monta Vista High. Fresh interior designer paint. Remodeled kitchen. Hardwood floors thru-out. Upgraded bathrooms (master bath done w/ out permit). Spacious backyard. Walk to schools. Near parks, Deep Cliff Golf Course. Close to shopping, De Anza, Hwy 85 & 280.

With all the glum news lately, I thought I’d celebrate things that make the Real Bay Area happy. Like this house!

Hey savvy negotiators, if you can get the owner to knock off just $11k, this house would be unbelievably lucky! 888,888? Come on… that’s some heavy hitting feng shui right there. It’s like East Meets West – traditional white picket fence, super lucky numbers.

Can someone say fusion cuisine? That said if you do knock of $11k, you’ll lower the price per square foot to $875 – not so lucky. Might I suggest overbidding to $901,320 to get the magical $888 per square foot? It’s less than $1500 more! Your children are worth it, aren’t they?

1 in 7 homes in Santa Clara County is ‘underwater’ – San Jose Mercury News
In Cupertino, for example, only 1 percent of owners who purchased their homes since 2003 were underwater — also called “upside-down” — in the third quarter. In San Jose’s 95122 ZIP code, 62 percent of recent buyers had negative equity. In Gilroy, 51 percent did.

That’s bad news for many homeowners in the San Jose metropolitan area. But, said Stan Humphries, Zillow’s vice president for data and analytics, “When you compare it to other major metro areas in California, it actually fares very well.”

Seriously? People are talking about Gilroy when they talk about the Bay Area? Still? Come on MSM (Main Street Media)! Get with the times!

Here’s a corrected map of the Real Bay Area:

Let’s focus on the real news:

Humphries noted that home values in Santa Clara County cities such as Cupertino and Mountain View finally began to slip in the third quarter, despite the fact that other parts of the county already have seen double-digit depreciation.

“Prior to this quarter we were thinking of those as oases,” he said. “It’s very evident just how much the San Jose metro region has been buoyed by the tech sector.”

In Cupertino, Los Altos, Mountain View, Palo Alto and Sunnyvale, the company said, the median estimated value of all homes declined between 1 and 2 percent in the third quarter, compared with a year earlier. Monte Sereno was the only community in the county where values rose compared with third quarter 2007, rising 1.3 percent.

Good! Good riddance. All those Real Bay Area wannabees will finally be purged, so we can focus on retaining the best Real Bay Area homeowners. So 2008 isn’t going to end with a bang… that just sets us up to be in an even better position for 2009! OH YEAH!

BTW, Monte Sereno, you are my new BFF.

Bay Area homeowners owe more than home’s worth
Twenty percent of Bay Area homeowners owe more on their mortgages than their homes are worth, according to a study being released today. This dubious distinction has entered the American lexicon as an all-too-familiar term – being underwater.

Tsk tsk tsk… once again the MSM (Main Street Media) gets it wrong. Yes there are houses underwater in the Bay Area. But what does it really look like in the Real Bay Area? Who cares if Snoopy’s doghouse is upside down in Santa Rosa (heck, he sleeps on the top anyway), what matters is how are house prices in Palo Alto and Cupertino.

Here’s a remix of their misleading chart:

Sure, the Real Bay Area is hurting a little these days. But this is great news – this just means that next year, prices will rocket once people get over their pessimism and start to spend spend spend. Hey, didn’t LinkedIn just get more funding? Didn’t Obama promise to support alt energy startups?

The good times are coming back soon – now’s the best time to buy.

So yesterday, we saw what $695,000 buys you in the world famous Cupertino – with its best of Bay Area schools:

Remember! Free fridge! Remove it before you knock the house down!

As is tradition, let’s take a look at what roughly the same amount of money will buy you in another equivalent school district:

TENAFLY, NJ 07670

$679,000
($3,806 per month | Personalize this estimate | Check local mortgage rates)
4 Bed, 3 Bath |
MLS ID #2830900
96 days on this site

Property Information Save Listing
Move right in this spacious 4 Bdrm./2 full Bath home on a desirable street & enjoy the best schools in the state. Renovated EIKit & Baths 2-car garage w/ paver driveway. Central A/C Finished basement complete w/ full bath & galley Kit. with access to private back yard. Excellent for extended family or professional office. Seller will hold Mtge. for Qualified Buyer.
Property Features

*   Single Family Property
* Status: Active
* Area: TENAFLY
* 4 total bedroom(s)
* 3 total bath(s)
* 3 total full bath(s)
* Style: Colonial
* Fireplace(s)
* 2 car garage
* Heating features: Gas, Hot air
* Central air conditioning
* Exterior construction: Clapboard

Now, let’s face it – you could get a 4/3 for the price of a 0/0 here but be honest – just look at the economy. NY City is shedding millions of jobs. In fact, they expect the NYC metro area to lose 20 million jobs because of the Wall St fiasco – the same Wall St fiasco that destroyed the housing market in California by tricking us using their NY fast talking skills into taking bad mortgages.

On the other hand, Silicon Valley is completely immune from this down turn. Heck, while I was writing this, 22 new social networking virtualization mobile companies popped up.

So there you go – big house in nation’s best school district with job uncertainty, or a house that has to be torn down in the Bay Area’s best school district with guaranteed jobs?

It’s an easy choice if you ask me.

18985 BARNHART Ave Cupertino, CA 95014
Price: $695,000

Beds:     2
Baths:     1
Sq. Ft.:     814
$/Sq. Ft.:     $854
Lot Size:     5,355 Sq. Ft.
Age (Years):    55
Year Built:    1953
Type:    Detached Single Family
Stories:    1 Story
View(s):    Neighborhood
Neighborhood:    Cupertino
County:     Santa Clara
MLS#:     80825766
Source:     MLSListings
Status:     Active
On Redfin:     83 days
Older CUP home in Rancho Rinconada area. Ideal to knock down and build your dream home. Good size lot. Home is in decent condition for age. Many neighbors built new homes in immediate area. Walk to Sedgwick Elementary. Minutes to Lawrence Expwy. 1 carport. Kitchen remodeled at one time. Dual pane. Gas stove. Frig stays. Inside laundry room. Vacant! Just Go ! Leave a business card !

In the world famous city of Cupertino, and in the prestigious Rancho Rinconada area, this opportunity simply can’t be passed up. All you have to do is buy the home and knock it down. You may want to keep the kitchen though, after all it was remodelled once since 1953. And… the frig does stay. Taken together, this is a huge value.

JUST GO! Leave a business card. Or better yet, leave an offer – after all, this is your chance to beat your neighbors ad build an even nicer new home than theirs. Booyah!