April 30, 2010

Excellent Investment Opportunity: Corner Lot Residence in Palo Alto’s Best Neighborhood!

Thanks to Burbed reader Gallileo for this find!

Excellent Investment Opportunity: Corner Lot Residence in Palo Alto’s Best Neighborhood!
Location: Old Palo Alto 8249611_max
This 3br/1.5ba single-family residence is an owner-occupied, ranch style one-level home (1328 sq. ft.) with a two-car attached garage. The house was built in 1950 and is on a corner lot (5625 sq. ft., Zoned R1) surrounded by multi-million dollar estates in the most prestigious neighborhood of Old Palo Alto located just ten minutes walking distance to University Ave. in downtown Palo Alto.
The owners have lived on the property since 1977 and prefer to continue residing in the home for the next ten years as opposed to accepting a traditional outright sale. Based on a 2007 appraisal, the property was valued at $1.2m. The property’s current fair market value now is estimated to be at least $1.0 million. *According to the City of Palo Alto Development Center, a new house may be constructed up to 2,438 sq. ft. (not including basement area which may also be built up to the same square footage area as the main level.)
The owners are open to all serious offers. However – as a reference point, they have considered the summarized scenarios below which will enable them to continue living in the property.
SCENARIO A
The owner-occupant will accept a $600,000 loan secured by a new first deed of trust at 6% compounded monthly. The owner will continue to live on the property with no loan payments and move out in 10 years with an end payoff to the lender of $1,091k in ten years. An alternative option is the owner would agree to pay a lender 60% of the purchase price in 10 years – allowing the buyer to be paid whichever payoff is higher depending on how inflation affects the property’s value at the end of ten years. *An investor in this scenario would need to consider their imputed interest because an investor making a loan with no payments (such as buying a zero-coupon bond) may still need to pay tax each year on the interest that accrues during the year. In this instance, a retirement account or non-profit entity may be a suitable investor.
SCENARIO B
The owner will accept $900,000 for the property as-is, through an outright sale now. The seller will continue to live in the property for the next ten years. Rather than paying rent to the new buyer (on which, an investor would be required to pay income tax), the seller will instead continue to pay 100% of the ongoing costs of property owner­ship such as insurance, property taxes, and maintenance during the ten years at which time, the buyer can take possession and/or sell.
SCENARIO C
Buyer to purchase a 67% undivided interest in the property for $600,000 cash. At the end of ten years, the current owner will sell their remaining 33% with a first right of refusal to the buyer for its fair market value.
*Buyers are required to consult with their own attorney and tax consultant, and are urged to conduct their own due diligence with the City of Palo Alto Planning Department regarding usage, building restrictions, and zoning laws. Any contracts and/or deed of trust will be recorded with both buyer/seller parties providing their own attorney representation and contract review at their own expense.

Property Location
740 Addison Ave.
Palo Alto, CA 94301
View Map
Features
Bedrooms: 3     Bathrooms: 1.5
Parking Spaces: 2       Year Built: 1950
Lot Size: 5625  Garage Size: 2
School District: Palo Alto      Square Footage: 1328

Here is another one for you. My guess is that someone has had a little too many cash-out refi’s and is looking for a way to stay in their home, but it’s really the bank’s at this point. Just look at the artistic color–easter egg blue is all the rage these days. Plus it is located on the corner of Fulton Street, which is Palo Alto’s “Christmas Tree Lane”–just on the part of it that isn’t part of the show. You get the Fulton street connection with none of the pesky tourists!

And such a realistic price–Just mention the 2007 price and you know you get 200K of instant equity just out of the gate. Now there is an investment worth pursuing.

Comments (116) -- Posted by: burbed @ 5:13 am

116 Responses to “Excellent Investment Opportunity: Corner Lot Residence in Palo Alto’s Best Neighborhood!”

  1. waiting_for_the_fall Says:

    They also want you to write a letter telling them why they should sell to you.

  2. CB Says:

    12/5/2007 Grant Deed Refi

    Buyer/Grantor
    Richard Goodell
    740 Addison Ave
    Palo Alto CA 94301

    Seller/Grantee
    Goodell Richard H & Ellen R

    First mortgage $350,000
    Fixed Rate
    World Savings

    Property Shark never has much on seconds/helocs, but it is conceivable that in 2007 they refinanced the 1st and got a heloc for the balance based on the 1.2M appraisal.

  3. SEA Says:

    This needs a translation to Real Estater speak. I’ll assume this is actually in the RBA. It’s a bit too close to the former RBA for my liking.

    This may be simplified as follows: We want to live here, and we want the benefits of ownership, and we want the benefits of renting.

    Maybe they have never heard of a reverse mortgage?

    “My guess is that someone has had a little too many cash-out refi’s and is looking for a way to stay in their home, but it’s really the bank’s at this point.”

    I wonder how they are able to offer “a new first deed of trust” for only $600k if this place has too much debt already? Maybe they are hoping that someone will fork over $600k without doing a title search?

    I have to say, however, that this is the funniest thing I have read in quite some time, “Rather than paying rent to the new buyer (on which, an investor would be required to pay income tax), the seller will instead continue to pay 100% of the ongoing costs of property owner­ship such as insurance, property taxes, and maintenance during the ten years at which time, the buyer can take possession and/or sell.”

    First it’s pay mortgage interest to avoid taxes. Now it’s reduce your income to avoid taxes. Actually this scheme might not pass an IRS audit. I’m sure the occupant would keep this place in immaculate condition, with a fresh coat of exterior paint every 5 years. Oh, that’s right, paint is not a moving part, so you never need to paint, unless you want to for some reason. And I am sure the roof will be in pristine condition after 10 more years.

  4. Real Estater Says:

    The owner is over-thinking the situation. If he has financial issues, it can be easily resolved by selling the house. I think the real motive is to be able to continue living in Palo Alto until he dies. Remember what I said before

  5. Petsmart groomer Says:

    If the former owner keeps living in the house without paying any rent, wouldn’t he have to declare the market value of the rent as income and therefore pay income tax?

  6. CB Says:

    And, he’s on the hook for the new property tax bill based on the reassessment if SCENARIO B was implemented. That’s ~10-12 K/year.

  7. SEA Says:

    “If the former owner keeps living in the house without paying any rent, wouldn’t he have to declare the market value of the rent as income and therefore pay income tax?”

    I believe the idea is that the “fair value” of the rent is exactly the expenses, so the net tax due is zero. Alternatively, the profit on rent is not material. Of course this would require the depreciation expense, taxes, etc., to approximate the fair value of the rent.

    This place might return to the RBA in 10 years…

    This is a deal built on faith!

  8. SEA Says:

    “And, he’s on the hook for the new property tax bill based on the reassessment if SCENARIO B was implemented. That’s ~10-12 K/year.”

    For an extra $300k today, I’d be more than happy to pay $10k to $12k per year for 10 years.

  9. nomadic Says:

    CB, PropertyShark does mention there is a second and a third mortgage on the place.

    Taxable value is $155k.

  10. nomadic Says:

    I’m sure the occupant would keep this place in immaculate condition, with a fresh coat of exterior paint every 5 years.

    ROTFLMAO – did you look at the picture? This place is at least five years past being desperate for a paint job.

  11. nomadic Says:

    Check out this guy’s occupation:
    http://www.kudzu.com/m/Goodell-Dick-7757345

    Bookkeeping for Individuals Bank Reconciliations Accounts Payable & Receivable General Bookkeeping Services Tax Return Preparation Accounting Software Training Forensic Accounting Fraud Detection International Taxation Notary Services Sarbanes-Oxley

  12. plainsilly Says:

    Good luck trying to sell a house where you don’t get possession till 10 years later. Please usually sell a house when they’re done with it! Given the condition, I’d guess it’s someone elderly. Can they also guarantee they won’t pass away in the house? Because that would seriously affect the price of the property as well.

  13. Gallileo Says:

    RealEstater@4

    They aren’t overthinking the situation at all, nor are they just trying to solve their financial problems.

    They want to solve their financial problems *and* still live in the house.

    In other words, they want their cake and to eat it too….

  14. Real Estater Says:

    Well, hopefully gentrification would work its magic.

  15. A. Lewis Says:

    I think this is an important post. This tells a lot about 94301 psychology.

    I could make a lot of criticisms, but instead, I’ll ask for help. I don’t get Scenario A.

    Can someone explain how Scenario A works in detail?

  16. SEA Says:

    Option A:

    Standard $600k loan secured by the property with a balloon payment due of $1,091k in 10 years.

    If, however, the property is worth more than $1,768k, then an amount equal to 60% of the fair market value is due.

    Thus the idea is that the minimum return is 6%, but could be higher if the property is worth significantly more than $1.8M in 10 years.

    What happens if this fine piece of property isn’t worth $1M in 10 years? lol

    And we all know that it’s worth $1.2M, well, ah, at least 1.0M without dispute! Just ask Real Estater!

  17. A. Lewis Says:

    #16, Thanks SEA. So Option A is just asking for someone to be a banker, not a property owner. At the end of 10 years you get a balloon payment – NOT the property!?

    And that’s because…they’re going to stay there, or sell it to some future, unknown buyer? I assume it’s to sell it to a 3rd party, and use that money to pay the ‘banker’ off. So it’s a 6%, 10-year investment, secured by Real Estate. Hmmm – well it does beat the 10-year treasury rate, but it’s an awfully funny idea.

    I love it. Maybe since they’re asking for this loan, they could provide some more documentation on themselves, so we can better judge their ability to keep up the property, and their history of paying debts.

  18. A. Lewis Says:

    Completely OT – ran across this Craigslist Posting for a rental home in the East Bay:

    “El Cerrito hill 5 mins to BART 10mins to Berkeley 20 mins to San Francisco 4bedroom + Den or 5 bedroom 3 bathroom single family home apx 3000 sqfts living area with large Living/Family/Dinner room front and back yard lot 10250 sqfts next to El Cerrito hill Golf court walk to good k-school near Bus station completeed leadscaped yard care large pentio and BBQ grill two car garage refigerator washer/dryer stove oven diswasher many up-grand newly remodel kitche grante counter top with high bar chair good high class El Cerrito area interest person let me know about you to like What you do? How many occpuancy? How is you credit score? Do you smake and have pets? and your full name and tel# Will Call/Show thank you bout no section 8″

    Try saying it all in one breath. That is AWESOME!

    Here’s the link:

    http://sfbay.craigslist.org/eby/apa/1707065527.html

  19. A. Lewis Says:

    I don’t know if I ‘smake’ or not. Maybe that’s an RBA-insiders only term – if you have to ask, you can’t afford to live in this neighborhood.

    Do you smake?

  20. nobody Says:

    Desperate bagholders doing everything they can to continue their denial. Anyone who enables them is a sucker.

  21. nomadic Says:

    Standard $600k loan secured by the property with a balloon payment due of $1,091k in 10 years…

    So you’re saying the buyer gives them $600k now and another $1,091k in 10 years? (Ignoring the other stuff about 60%.) What am I not understanding here? I’m not clear on who they’re calling “owner” and “lender” through the paragraph because presumably ownership will transfer at the inception of the agreement.

    This kind of deal really beats the whole “house-as-an-ATM” concept. You could suck out future equity this way.

  22. sv_newbie Says:

    I think it redefines RBA. If you get your house after you buy it, that is certainly not in RBA.

  23. madEstater Says:

    Wow. If the deal is too complicated to understand, that means someone is trying to cheat you. Do they want to sell this place or not? Redfin says it’s “Off-Market” (which means they tried), and the map says it’s northeast of Middlefield, which means it isn’t RBA. Next!

    nomadic, you found 3 loans on this property? I looked at the Santa Clara County recorder’s office and there’s only the refi that CB found in #2. It’s from December 2007, and is only for Ellen, not Richard.

    Also the taxes were paid late this year, on April 9th (both payments), resulting in a penalty. Wonder if the inhabitants need an accountant to handle their paperwork.

    No results on Intelius for either Richard or Ellen in the state of California, either. Maybe their kids are living there, but if they are, they aren’t named Godell.

    A (I can still call you A, right?), stop posting about the East Bay. The East Bay isn’t in the RBA, the Former RBA, or even The Corridor of Not Quite. Kensington can’t carry Menlo Park’s jock. Montclaire can’t be Burlingame West on it’s best day ever. Piedmont is still Oakland. This has been a recording.

  24. madEstater Says:

    Correction: Montclaire can’t be Burlingame West on its best day ever.

    2nd Correction: Montclaire can’t be Burlingame East, better known as SFO, on its best day ever.

  25. madhaus Says:

    Case-Schiller is out for February. I found this comment of interest:

    According to the Index, single-family home values for the bottom third of the market in the San Francisco MSA are just below September 2000 levels having fallen 57% from a peak in August 2006, the middle third is hovering around June 2002 levels having fallen 37% from a peak in May 2006, and the top third slipped back below February 2004 levels having fallen 26% from a peak in August 2007.

    San Francisco MSA does not include Santa Clara County and is poisoned by Alameda County, redefining the entire “bottom third” tier, but STILL. Top third is down to February 2004 levels? Why at this rate, 94301 will soon fail to double in 100 years.

  26. DreamT Says:

    Time.com’s (Joe Stein’s) list of least influentials just came out. Strangely on page 3 right above Heidi, Real Estater did not make the cut.

  27. DreamT Says:

    I didn’t understand today’s post at all, but it has a whiff of “my bank won’t give me another HELOC, could you?”

  28. SEA Says:

    “So you’re saying the buyer gives them $600k now and another $1,091k in 10 years?”

    If you invest $600k at 6%, then you would expect $1,091k after 10 years. (I didn’t check the math, but a doubling in 10 years is about 7.2%, so 1.1M on a $600k investment is quite close to “6% compounded monthly.”)

    “At the end of 10 years you get a balloon payment – NOT the property!?”

    Yes, at the end of 10 years you get ~$1.1M, not the property. If the property is worth substantially more than $1.8M, then you get a bonus return. This is some form of inflation protection, like TIPS. You know, if the property goes up in value, then inflation is high, so the 6% was too low.

    DreamT-“my bank won’t give me another HELOC, could you?”

    I’ve long asked, if a professional banker won’t lend you money, why should I? Alternatively, how much interest will I need to charge to be properly compensated, and how much collateral will it take to reduce the risk enough that I would even consider the deal?

    Ultimately I think the guy is having cash flow problems, so all of these options are structured so he does not have to pay anything today, but the operating costs. So, even if he did have a more traditional lender that was willing to lend him cash, he’d still have to make monthly payments.

    If he could just pull off a deal where someone paid all the existing debt off where no monthly payments were due for 10 years, he’d be all set.

  29. SEA Says:

    I love the review:

    “Great service, creative accounting.
    Like many seniors in Palo Alto, I found myself sitting on a former goldmine turned tapped out financial liability. Mr Dick suggested I wield the shaft and find an investor to pay me $900,000 to live in my home for 10 years! Needless to say, life is great. After paying off my first, second AND third mortgage I was left with $200,000 of cold hard cash, free rent and enough spare time to trim my hedges. Sweet Equity Baby!”

    From link in #11

  30. nomadic Says:

    If you invest $600k at 6%, then you would expect $1,091k after 10 years. (I didn’t check the math, but a doubling in 10 years is about 7.2%, so 1.1M on a $600k investment is quite close to “6% compounded monthly.”)

    Yes, the math works out. The part about “the lender” not getting the property at the end was what I didn’t get. Mind-boggling that this joker thinks someone will give him $600k today and trust him to give back over a million in 10 years. Sure, it’s secured by the property… depending on whether the money is actually used to clear the current liens.

  31. anon Says:

    Indeed. And if wishes were horses, then beggars would ride.

  32. nomadic Says:

    Nice one, CB. :-) Post of the day, and it isn’t even on burbed!

  33. nomadic Says:

    I think this is the perfect investment for Real Estater. Option A. Of course the house will be worth at least $2M in 10 years and he’ll get the bonus money. Better yet, the occupant will default on the balloon payment and RE can own this tear-down for “just” $600k. Win-win!

  34. SEA Says:

    “The part about “the lender” not getting the property at the end was what I didn’t get.”

    Did you really think you’d get this fine property in 10 years for only $600k today? You see, we all know that it will be worth at least $1.8M, then the “owner” will pay off the $1.1M and walk away with a minimum of $700k.

    I wish I could write crap like this.

  35. nomadic Says:

    At first I thought he wanted $600k today and then another $1,091k in 10 years from the buyer – then you get full title. After all, the initial $600k is secured by a “new first deed.”

  36. SEA Says:

    Oh, yes, I could see that.

    Pay $600k today.
    Pay $1.1M in 10 years.

    Then you can own this property. Using a discount rate of 6%, you’d only pay $1.2M (present value), which just happens to be the value in 2007.

    Your system is so much better.

  37. madhaus Says:

    This ad (which has since expired) reminds me of the child of the Mafioso and the physicist.

    He made himself an offer he couldn’t understand.

  38. SEA Says:

    madhaus- I will comment on the finance aspect, without considering the legal scheme, and without full commentary on all the risks, and so on. Given the right assumptions, the finance part of these scenarios is very clean. Someone who knows finance drafted these scenarios. Sure there are risks are left out. Sure it might not be legal. Sure there might be tax problems. But all of this is covered quite nicely with the, “Buyers are required to consult with their own attorney and tax consultant, and are urged to conduct their own due diligence with the City of Palo Alto Planning Department regarding usage, building restrictions, and zoning laws. Any contracts and/or deed of trust will be recorded with both buyer/seller parties providing their own attorney representation and contract review at their own expense.”

    Just for fun:

    Scenario A:
    Earn 6% (it’s presented as if it is without risk…)
    Be paid $1,091k in 10 years on an initial investment of $600k today.

    One Risk:
    What if the property is not worth $1.1M in 10 years?

    Scenario B:
    Invest $900k today, and take possession of the property in 10 years. I guess since the value is all in land, you need not worry about the condition the property is in, yet he suggests that it needs to be insured. Puzzling.

    One Added Risk:
    What if the zoning is changed for the worse?

    Scenario C:
    Pay $600k today, and then pay 1/3 of market value in 10 years. Note that if the property is worth $1.8M in 10 years, then you’d pay ~$925k on a present value basis.

    Today: You’d pay $600k (Future value $1.1m)
    10 years from now: You’d pay another $600k (Present value ~$325k)
    FV of cash payments = $1.1M + $600k = $1.8M
    PV of cash payments = $600k + $325k = $925k
    The 1/3 owner would walk away with the $600k in 10 years.

    PV of asset: $925k

    So where is the money to be made?

    That’s on the positive rate spread. You really only expect something less than 6% on your money, but you have this great opportunity to earn 6% that’s almost as safe as US Treasury backed debt (for those who don’t recognize it, this house deal is full of risk, and far from safe). PV of asset with a discount rate of zero = $1.8M (given the assumptions above)

    Now we need to compute the present value of this deal with a discount rate of 4%, or less. We know the really wealthy are looking to lock their money up in a safe house, and when you can avoid all those taxes (and we are talking about those who pay the highest taxes here, both state and federal), it’s a gold mine!!!

    This might be a deal if you really thought real estate was a sure bet, and you had the extra cash that you didn’t need for the 10 years and it is and will only earning 1%.

    Basically, why earn 1% when you can earn 6%?

    Better yet, maybe you have really good credit, and you can get a $600k loan for 5%. Ignoring some complexities, you’d earn a positive 1% yield spread. Of course, I’ve mentioned in #28 that no professional banker would touch this deal, so there is very likely other problems.

    All that said, this screams desperation to fix a cash flow problem…

    Finally: I am not sure that this property was ever really worth $1.2M or $1.0M. But, if these assumptions are correct, and if we have the right person, and if the market performs as expected, and, and, and, then it could pay off.

    I stick to my guess that he wants all the debt paid off without having to service the debt.

    Maybe he’s not old enough to qualify for good reverse mortgage terms? Reverse mortgages are not exactly priced on a 10 years and you are for sure out basis. That’s not even mentioning the 1st, 2nd and 3rd mortgage.

  39. DreamT Says:

    TL but good read SEA.
    I wonder how creative one may get with collaterals (making the bet an attractive short on the property). Short of asking the owner’s soul if things turn sour, there’s still probably a wide range of possibilities…

  40. nomadic Says:

    Given the right assumptions, the finance part of these scenarios is very clean. Someone who knows finance drafted these scenarios.

    SEA, you could always subscribe to his newsletter…
    http://midpenre.com/2009/08/14/how-to-buy-a-foreclosure-on-the-courthouse-steps/

    See the first section under “additional resources.”

  41. SEA Says:

    Just send cash to: “Charles Gordon Enterprises, 555 Bryant St. #484, Palo Alto, CA 94301.”

    Only $189 for a one day seminar.

    Newsletter:
    1 month $100 (~$25 each issue)
    6 months $550
    12 months $1,000

    Who actually buys this crap?

  42. nomadic Says:

    Just send cash and I’ll tell you.

  43. SEA Says:

    Where’s Real Estater?

  44. nomadic Says:

    Begging Dick to take $500k because it’s only chump change anyway?

  45. SEA Says:

    The two are probably working the deal so he doesn’t have an AMT problem? I can almost hear it… Since you won’t have income, you won’t have a tax problem. Even though you won’t have taxable income, you’ll make lots of cash.

  46. Real Estater Says:

    >>Where’s Real Estater?

    This is getting boring. First we’ve got an over-thinking owner/seller, then you jumped in to over-think it some more (actually, a lot more). Maybe you should buy the property so that you guys can think about it together.

  47. madhaus Says:

    See Dick.
    See Dick take.
    Take, Dick, take.

    See Dick take money.
    Money, Dick, money.

    See Dick take money from his house.
    See Dick’s debt.
    Debt, Dick, debt.

    See Dick take more debt.
    Borrow, Dick, borrow.

    See Dick’s liens.
    Dick’s house has three liens.
    Oh! Oh! How can Dick pay so much debt?
    Poor Dick!

    Dick goes to the bank.
    Go, Dick, go.
    See the banker.
    Dick sees the banker.
    Dick says, “Hello, Mr. Banker. I need money.”
    The banker is angry.
    The banker is angry with Dick.
    The banker says, “Dick, no more money. You are upside-down.”

    Dick is upset.
    How can this be?
    Dick’s house is Special.
    Dick’s house is worth a lot of money.
    The banker says no.
    No, Dick, no.
    “Your house is not in the RBA, Dick.”
    No more money for Dick.
    Oh! Oh!
    Poor Dick.

    Dick has a plan.
    Plan, Dick, plan.

    Dick needs a mark for his plan.
    Oh! Oh!
    Where will Dick find a bigger fool?
    Dick has a plan.
    Dick needs money.
    Dick can get money from his plan.
    All Dick needs is a mark.

    Dick writes his plan.
    Write, Dick, write.
    Dick’s plan will make money.
    Dick’s plan will work if he finds a fool.
    Mark, fool, whatever.
    All Dick needs is a mark who doesn’t know about money.

    Dick’s plan is good.
    Many people will want to buy Dick’s house.
    Dick’s house is in the best place.
    Dick’s house is Special.
    Do you want to buy Dick’s house?
    You can buy Dick’s house!
    Read Dick’s plan.

    Dick’s plan is not simple.
    Dick needs money.
    Dick owns a Special house.
    Dick wants to live in his Special house until he dies.
    Die, Dick, die.

    Do you want Dick’s house?
    You can buy it.
    You can own it, but Dick wants it for ten years.
    Can you wait ten years?
    Then you can be Dick’s mark!
    Then Dick will have money.
    Then Dick can stay in his house.
    What do you get?
    You get to pay now for a house.
    You must wait ten years.
    Do you know what the house will cost in ten years?
    Dick is hoping you want his house.
    If you want to live here, you will wait.

    Does Dick get his money?
    The banker says Dick’s house is not Special.
    People listen to the banker.
    People blog about Dick’s house.
    Blog, people, blog.

    Oh! Oh!
    Nobody wants to wait.
    Nobody wants Dick’s house in ten years.
    Dick gets one offer.
    Somebody says I will buy the house. But I want it now.
    Where will Dick live?

    What a Dick!

  48. SEA Says:

    Real Estater- “This is getting boring. First we’ve got an over-thinking owner/seller, then you jumped in to over-think it some more (actually, a lot more).”

    I know so many others have made comments about your ability to work basic math, but now I must question your ability to think.

  49. madhaus Says:

    I know so many others have made comments about your ability to work basic math, but now I must question your ability to think.

    Now you question his ability to think? Most of us questioned and dismissed it years ago. Come on. RE is a bot. No matter what you say, only a few basic messages come out:

    Now is a great time to buy!
    Buy the most home you can afford!
    I see X is attacking me with provocation. I don’t do that and neither should you.
    I am an average tech guy and I own in 94301. Anyone can do this if they work harder but most of you are lazy
    Pralay, have you found a job yet?
    madhaus, why haven’t you moved up to 94301 yet? What are you afraid of?
    nomadic, you hypocrite, you own a house and tell others not to buy!
    DreamT, why are you doing your own laundry and living in Real Grey Area?
    anon, enjoying that Cayenne? Why didn’t you buy a house? Loser.
    SvlShopper, I’d be glad to help you, since you’re the only here who is respectful.
    burbed, make them stop!
    I never lie and I am here to help and I always said so.
    Why are you wasting your time posting on here instead of working?
    I am better than you because I have [trophy wife, Bang & Olofsson telephone, Sub-Zero fridge, exotic plants in yard, Porsche, SUV that will run your crap riceburner off the road].
    DOW Soars!
    Here is more good news! [link that doesn't work] We’re clear for takeoff!
    Home sales up! [link that contradicts claim.
    Homes priced over a million! No downturn here! [link to unsold house with high asking price]
    X I am tired of your insulting talk. Hey, Y, still renting?

    Occasionally somebody adds a few more items but that’s the basic bot.

  50. Real Estater Says:

    madhaus,

    Is Pralay paying you to fill in for him? You’re not being very creative; just repeating the same crap he has already over-sold.

  51. Real Estater Says:

    SEA says,

    >>Just for fun:

    Who the hell think this is fun? This is utter waste of time.

  52. madhaus Says:

    Who the hell think this is fun? This is utter waste of time.

    Why does RE complain about this site and almost everyone who posts to it… but not leave? Is his self-esteem so low that he’d rather have a bunch of strangers insult him, than deal with the life he has? Oh, right. The life he has is even worse. How sad.

  53. Real Estater Says:

    madhaus,

    Instead of thinking of new ways to attack me, shouldn’t you be tending to your children? Are they tee’ed up to get into a tier 1 university, or are they going to put their CUSD education to waste?

  54. madhaus Says:

    Instead of thinking of new ways to attack me, shouldn’t you be tending to your children?

    Poor RE. Just because you can’t multitask doesn’t mean others share your limited prowess.

    Besides, I don’t need to think up new ways to attack you. That’s one of those things where you just have to open your mouth and all I have to do is gesture ironically, For great justice!

    Are they tee’ed up to get into a tier 1 university, or are they going to put their CUSD education to waste?

    Don’t be ridiculous. They’re legacies. I could be chugging Four Roses every night on Market Street while setting fire to the Ferry Building, and they’d still get into a better school than your unenlightened rugrats. But thanks for asking, RE. It’s good to see that where a normal person would inquire into my family’s good health or prospects, you would turn such a conversational ploy into a put-down. Just keep being you, and stop being surprised when you reap the whirlwind every time.

  55. SEA Says:

    I like nonsense. It wakes up the brain cells. -Dr. Seuss

  56. nomadic Says:

    argh – spam-filter be damned!

    madhaus – the proper RE quote is “home sales is up.” I can’t provide the nifty link.

  57. nomadic Says:

    BTW, loved the “Dick” reading primer.

  58. madhaus Says:

    You couldn’t Pralay the link? I found it in four seconds.

    RealEstater Says:
    March 25th, 2008 at 4:04 pm
    >>Our present economy is going down the toilet

    But is it affecting you? If you look at the stock market, the DOW and Nasdaq are still at very respectable levels. We just heard Feb home sales is up. There’s is no unemployment issue in the BA, and there’s no housing crash to speak of.

    Glad you liked the primer. Since I was writing for a first-grade audience and RE, I typed it slow, too.

  59. SEA Says:

    “Since I was writing for a first-grade audience and RE, I typed it slow, too.”

    I am not sure you typed slow enough for Real Estater.

  60. Real Estater Says:

    >>Don’t be ridiculous. They’re legacies. I could be chugging Four Roses every night on Market Street while setting fire to the Ferry Building, and they’d still get into a better school than your unenlightened rugrats.

    One of them is a senior in high school, right? Well, if your kid is really lucky, he or she would be coming to my neck of the woods for school.

  61. nomadic Says:

    You couldn’t Pralay the link? I found it in four seconds.

    No. I had the link. The spam filter ate it. Hence the “spam-filter be damned” remark.

  62. SEA Says:

    Real Estater- “Well, if your kid is really lucky, he or she would be coming to my neck of the woods for school.”

    Your world might be full of luck, but some people are talented.

    I guess if you have to choose between skill and luck, maybe luck would win out?

  63. Real Estater Says:

    SEA,

    I just look at the results (whether it’s college, real estate, or chicks).

  64. SEA Says:

    I am not suggesting winning the lottery is a bad thing.

  65. nomadic Says:

    I guess if you have to choose between skill and luck, maybe luck would win out?

    I’d say when one reads at an elementary school level and struggles with math, luck becomes more important, particularly when the individual strives for material goods to establish their position in life.

  66. madhaus Says:

    Actually, people who believe in luck and fate as the key to getting ahead tend to have virtually no control of their own lives.

    However, RE gives lip service to how hard work got him where he is. Since he clearly didn’t work hard (if he did his reading and math wouldn’t be as fubared), perhaps he’s like W; oblivious to the relatives and friends who have greased his path each step of the way, and unaware of his utter incompetence as he’s always been protected from it.

    But buying in 94301 in 2003? Now THAT was luck.

  67. Insecure techie Says:

    I just look at the results (whether it’s college, real estate, or chicks).
    —–

    LOL! Someone is asking us to look at the result! Ok, I can see the result – someone is staying up till 2AM to manage mega-project? Even the manager of a MacD franchise goes home by 10AM. Then who is this Real Estater? Night guard?

    So what exactly the result he is taking about? Did we see this guy in TV?

  68. Insecure techie Says:

    However, RE gives lip service to how hard work got him where he is.
    —–

    Well, not only he worked hard, what he is doing “any regular tech guy can do it“. Yes, ANY regular tech guy can do it. Just to convince you guys, I am taking you to a two year old post. It’s a hilarious one. As he loves to look at the result, let’s look at the result – line by line.

    1. I don’t invest in fly-over country. I only invest in places where property values always go up.

    Result: Real Estater is planning to buy his investment property for more than two years. So far? NONE.

    2. A property in the RBA will not just sit vacant for long periods. There is always an abundance of renters. Just look at the crowd on this site.

    Result: As there is abundance of renters in RBA, investing in RBA is pretty easy. Yet, Real Estater couldn’t buy a single investment property.

    3. I don’t use creative financing. If I can’t close a deal with regular financing, I don’t buy the house.

    Result: Closing deal? How many deals Real Estater closed so far? After all his name is Real Estater! 20 deals? 30? 50? 100?

    4. I follow best practices. I make sure there is money left over to cover any unexpected events after buying a house.

    Result: Best practices? What there to PRACTICE? Sounds like a four year old child playing real estate investor (or Real Estater).

    By the way, I don’t claim to have any secret formula. There are plenty of people like me (e.g. most of my friends), and not as many “Jeff’s” out there as you’d like to believe. What I’m doing, any regular tech guy can do it.

    Result: That’s right. ANY regular guy can it – except Real Estater.

  69. Insecure techie Says:

    BTW, two year old post is here.

  70. Real Estater Says:

    Zzzz…how many times can this guy refry the same beans?

  71. Real Estater Says:

    Is it just me, or has everyone been noticing that madhaus has been somewhat unstable lately?

  72. Insecure techie Says:

    Zzzz…how many times can this guy refry the same beans?
    —-

    I am just looking at results. :)

  73. Insecure techie Says:

    Is it just me, or has everyone been noticing that madhaus has been somewhat unstable lately?
    —–
    :) Wasn’t someone playing victim and accusing other for attacking?

  74. Real Estater Says:

    >>I am just looking at results.

    I think the beans are burnt by now :-)

  75. Real Estater Says:

    >>Did we see this guy in TV?

    Just wondering, did this guy pass ESL class?

  76. Insecure techie Says:

    I think the beans are burnt by now
    ——

    Great! After these beans are two year old. Deserve to be burnt. That post was useless and full of lies anyway. :)

  77. Insecure techie Says:

    Just wondering, did this guy pass ESL class?
    —-

    Nope. I blame it to public school. :)

  78. Real Estater Says:

    Everywhere in the nation, school districts and real estate values are closely linked. Check out the Yahoo article:

    “Priced out of the top public schools”
    (link gets eaten up by the crappy Burbed filter)

    In other words, being priced out of real estate is the same as being priced out of your kids’ education. Can you afford to lose this game?

    From the article, the school district is a direct function of the local demographics:

    “High test scores are very influenced by the wealth and educational background of people who live within those areas,” he says, adding that higher-performing peers benefit everyone. “Wealthy parents who have more pull in the school system can demand more accountability.”

  79. Insecure techie Says:

    High test scores are very influenced by the wealth and educational background of people who live within those areas,” he says, adding that higher-performing peers benefit everyone.
    —-

    That’s definitely positive news. That means Real Estater’s kids have a chance. Hopefully higher-performing peers will benefit Real Estater’s kids and help to overcome the shortcomings they have being Real Estater’s children.

  80. anon Says:

    “Result: Closing deal? How many deals Real Estater closed so far? After all his name is Real Estater! 20 deals? 30? 50? 100?

    4. I follow best practices. I make sure there is money left over to cover any unexpected events after buying a house.”

    Where is the post where real estater advocates stretching to buy the most house you can “afford?”

    Oh, and the reason that “good” schools are so highly sought after is because most americans are as ignorant as real estater. Consequently, they have no knowledge to pass on to their offspring. They need the public education system to do it for them.

  81. anon Says:

    >>Did we see this guy in TV?

    Just wondering, did this guy pass ESL class?

    I love it. Real estater – who can barely formulate a coherent sentence is attacking other people’s grammar. Too cute. He really is a little child trying to play real estate mogul. Fortunately, even an average tech guy can see through it.

  82. Insecure techie Says:

    who can barely formulate a coherent sentence is attacking other people’s grammar.
    —–

    Give him some credit. At least he can provide us “exercept”.

  83. Real Estater Says:

    Pralay (aka Insecure Techie):

    Why were you here instead of visiting open houses or watching the NBA playoffs “in” TV?

  84. DreamT Says:

    happy Sunday everyone

  85. Insecure techie Says:

    Faux Estater:

    Why were you here instead of visiting open houses or watching the NBA playoffs in TV?

  86. nomadic Says:

    He really is a little child trying to play real estate mogul.

    All of Trump’s bravado without any of the accomplishment.

  87. Insecure techie Says:

    All of Trump’s bravado without any of the accomplishment.
    —–

    And look at the similarity:
    Trump: “You’re fired“.
    Real Estater: “I can get you laid off anytime“.

    Only one minor difference – Real Estater does not have a prime-time TV slot. The best slot he got is Burbed’s comment section. :)

  88. madhaus Says:

    Is it just me, or has everyone been noticing that madhaus has been somewhat unstable lately?

    It’s just you. Ask me another easy one.

    Here’s another trip down memory lane for anyone who wants a good laugh.

    nomadic said:RE if you have the things you say you do, you should feel fortunate. Honest. Many others aren’t so lucky. Some, as I’m sure you’d point out, through their own laziness or stupidity, but many, many others who just didn’t have the luck or upbringing to realize their potential.

    And RE replied in this post: I hear it all the time. People say I’m “just lucky”. They don’t realize that I stay up a little later than they do, and I try a little harder than they do. Generally I would say that the chips fall where they should be. If you go to EPA, you see a certain type of people. When you go to PA or Atherton, you see another type. To go to East Bay, you see yet another type. It’s very rarely the case that by some “luck” or “fortune” someone just happens to be in a certain position.

    Bonus: DreamT replied that RE’s poss showed entitlement and onanism.

  89. SEA Says:

    Real Estater- “Zzzz…how many times can this guy refry the same beans?”

    How many times will you be fried?

  90. SEA Says:

    God, I cannot believe that everyone seems to think Real Estater relies on luck. I didn’t even realize the long history, since I have not been around that long.

    It’s like if you stay up an extra hour or two later, you’ll but the home that goes up in value. That’s not luck at all–that’s called hard work.

  91. madhaus Says:

    God, I cannot believe that everyone seems to think Real Estater relies on luck. I didn’t even realize the long history, since I have not been around that long.

    It’s like if you stay up an extra hour or two later, you’ll but the home that goes up in value. That’s not luck at all–that’s called hard work.

    SEA, did you read my post in #66? RE has the same relationship to hard work that Larry Craig has to upholding traditional values.

  92. nomadic Says:

    God, I cannot believe that everyone seems to think Real Estater relies on luck.

    You’re right. It was pure accident. Fate f**ked up and got the wrong guy. ;-)

  93. Alex Says:

    I don’t read this site for a bit and you guys run rampant.

    madhouse: how my Dick take? LOL

  94. Alex Says:

    Hopefully higher-performing peers will benefit Real Estater’s kids and help to overcome the shortcomings they have being Real Estater’s children.

    Sometimes, there is just no way to overcome bad genes.

  95. A. Lewis Says:

    Mm – took the weekend off, and you guys provided lots of entertainment. Thanks much.

    SEA – awesome job with the details of the bizarre PA ‘sale’. Don’t worry about DreamT saying your post is too long – some people are just that way. I liked it and read every word.

    madhaus – the Dick posting is awesome, epic. Best of Burbed nominee! Thanks for all you do…

    And it’s Montclair, not Montclaire. God, you people know nothing about the East Bay. You’d have no idea if it was RBA or not – you’ve probably never set foot northeast of the San Mateo Bridge!

    I bet you have more wealthy strategic walk-aways then we do when the recast wave crests this year! Nyah nyah! :-)

    By the way, it’s a bad time to buy. Renting is smarter.

    Try this link:

    http://bayarearealestatetrends.com/2010/04/30/buy-vs-rent-takedown/

  96. nomadic Says:

    God, you people know nothing about the East Bay. You’d have no idea if it was RBA or not – you’ve probably never set foot northeast of the San Mateo Bridge!

    bah, the East Bay is practically flyover country!

  97. madhaus Says:

    A, (can I still call you A if I keep misspelling East Bay nonentities like Montclaire and Rocqueridge and Kennzingtun and Pee duMonte?)

    Damn your eyes! That link you posted linked to a bunch of articles I was summarizing in one sweeping, powerful, mind-blowing guest post! burbed can confirm this as I was discussing it just the other day! But now I’m not even going to bother. Hmphf. Thanks for nothing.

    Actually, maybe bob should thank you, as my brilliant précis, which I may never post, thanks to you, proved that bob was wrong and (gasp) RealEstater was right.

    But seriously, have you forgotten that I was a resident of the East Bay for a few years, and took classes at UCB extension? Not at a satellite campus, either. I’ve been to all those places you keep having realgasms over, and trust me, they aren’t in the RBA. (Well, I haven’t been to Piedmont, but I hear it’s nothing special. I’ve been on CA-13 so I should know.)

    I’m glad you enjoyed See Dick’s debt. Curiously, I have not heard from the Dick in question. I thought he’d want to explain the three offers in shorter words so I could include his whole plan in my sequel, See Dick Die In His House Broke.

    madhouse: how my Dick take? LOL

    Alecs, if you want to get fresh you had better take the time to spell my name correctly.

    See Alex.
    See Alex eat.
    Mmmm! Beer and chips!
    Plenty under the couch!

    Alex wants a sandwich.
    Alex has meat.
    Meat, Alex, meat.
    But where is the bread?
    There is no top.
    And there is no bottom.
    Oh! Oh!
    Alex stays hungry.

  98. DreamT Says:

    A. I did compliment SEA’s post as being a good read. You’re just pissed because I joked (anon-style) TLDR on one of your posts (which by the way I still read). Cheer up, An.Ls.!

  99. Alex Says:

    madhouse, the kind of bread I’m looking for cannot be stale. Must be 30 yrs or younger. Ok, I’m willing to go up to 35. LOL

  100. madhaus Says:

    Thirty year old bread? That is some serious mold you’re gnawing on.

  101. Alex Says:

    Some of these Asian and redhead bread age well :p

  102. nomadic Says:

    madhaus, I think Alecks would be a better spelling – as in smart aleck.

  103. madhaus Says:

    madhaus, I think Alecks would be a better spelling – as in smart aleck.

    nomadic, I think anon called Alex perfectly.

    But no, the current orthography is current. You know, A-lex, as in without words.

  104. Alex Says:

    madhouse, I’m glad i made you speechless.

    “current orthography is current.” hmmmm could have improved yer diction there.

  105. A. Lewis Says:

    #98, oh DreamT, I was only teasing you – it’s a sign of affection. I was very pleased about this thread, not pissed. I admit I missed that you were channeling anon. I’ve been very spotty about reading Burbed for a while, so I miss some of the inside jokes and references.

    One’s goal in life is to become an inside joke at Burbed. Owning a home is lower priority…

  106. DreamT Says:

    A. I’m so relieved! ;) Here’s the TLDR reference: http://www.burbed.com/2010/02/21/solution-to-californias-budget-woes-tax-renters/#comment-55708

  107. A. Lewis Says:

    #106 – only a few posts below one of my own in that thread – I failed to follow up on that thread. ED is pretty funny – but with some seriously NSFW ads on the side!

  108. madhaus Says:

    A-lex, ah, my illness catching up with me again, the second “current” should have read “correct.”. And you watch where you point that diction at.

    A, (I can still call you A, right?), we are all anon. As to aspiring to an inside joke, you’re already there. Try to make your next comment a little harder to understand so Groomer can lance it with another perfect bon mot. Maybe another 20,000 words?

    You have ED? Have you talked to Robert Dole about it?

  109. A. Lewis Says:

    #108 – I didn’t say I had ED, I was cruel to all those suffering from it by saying it was pretty funny. Let’s practice using it in a sentence. As in: “It’s pretty funny your RBA wife comes to me to have her needs fulfilled because so many RBA men have ED!”.

    Yeah, that just rolls off the tongue smoothly. I have been accused of being a cunning linguist.

    Did you know that stressing over mortgage debt leads to ED?

  110. DreamT Says:

    Wow A. you leave me speechless, so I’ll simply give you lip service.

  111. nomadic Says:

    A. doth protest too much, methinks.

  112. Petsmart groomer Says:

    Actually, let’s add another requirement to be part of the RBA: no ED.

  113. madhaus Says:

    But the RBA is Special! That means they all get Special ED!

  114. corntrollio Says:

    This place has a listed sale for $933K in September. Anyone know the story?

    http://www.redfin.com/CA/Palo-Alto/740-Addison-Ave-94301/home/545789

    Their rent-lowering ideas were ridiculous.

  115. Real Estater Says:

    No idea.

  116. madhaus Says:

    Well, that settles that.


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