November 23, 2010

FRENCH DOORS AND WINDS, BASE BOARDING PARTIAL BASEMENT

Another great find from Burbed reader sonarrat!  I tell you, if it weren’t for sonarrat you’d be reading about Sunnyvale every single day!  This house was sent in because, “I had no idea this neighborhood was so hot. Is it because of the easy access to bail bonds?”

130 Rankin Ave, San Jose, CA 95110
$669,000

image

Beds: 3
Baths: 4.5
Sq. Ft.: 1,852
$/Sq. Ft.: $377
Lot Size: 5,000 Sq. Ft.
Property Type: Detached Single Family
Style: Colonial
Stories: 2
View: Neighborhood
Year Built: 1937
Community: Central San Jose
County: Santa Clara
MLS#: 81029707
Source: MLSListings
Status: Active
On Redfin: 157 days

MOTIVATED SELLER. NESTED IN A TRULY MAGNIFICENT & ELEGANT VENDOME NEIGHBORHOOD. DTWN JEWEL. A RARE FIND. FORMAL ENTRY, SEPRATE D/ROOM, GRACIOUS L/ROOM W/ FIREPLACE, BEAUTIFUL STAIRCASE, FRENCH DOORS & WINDS, HARDWOOD FLOORS, CROWN MOLDING, BASE BOARDING PARTIAL BASEMENT, CONVENIENTLY LOCATED NEAR LIGHT RAIL, JAPAN TOWN, SHOPPING & EASY ACCESS TO FREEWAYS & MAJOR STREETS.

I went through every one of these pictures and there are no FRENCH WINDS anywhere.  I’d even accept ENGLISH WINDS or WOOD WINDS.  Just no BREAK WINDS, though.

image Also I can’t find the BASE BOARDING the PARTIAL BASEMENT (or should that be a PARTIAL BASE MENT?).  Definitely another case of DECEPTIVE LISTING COPY.

But maybe this place is worth it for the classic console television,  If they throw that in, then it really would be A RARE FIND.

And if it is indeed a DTWN JEWEL then you’d have to worry about being arrested for STEALING it at this low, low price.  Fortunately, sonarrat helpfully informed us about the easy access to bail bonds services.

image

Right.  Looks like there are a number of fine agencies competing for our business!

Competition is a wonderful thing, but I am wondering if this TRULY MAGNIFICENT & ELEGANT VENDOME NEIGHBORHOOD has some basic niceties beyond having ten different bail bonds offices within two minutes’ drive.

On the plus side, with this LOCATION, LOCATION, LOCATION, you could rent out some extra bedrooms and bathrooms), plus that PARTIAL BASE MENT, to the city or county as an Overflow Jail Annex.  Your “guests” will appreciate how quickly the bail reps can show up!  The police will give you concierge service knowing some perp they bust is more likely to stay busted, thanks to your innovative inmate solution.  The neighborhood louts will steer clear of the serious muscle inside.  And you’ll appreciate knowing this house is making money for you every single day.

Comments (36) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:02 am

36 Responses to “FRENCH DOORS AND WINDS, BASE BOARDING PARTIAL BASEMENT”

  1. CB Says:

    I looked in “DTWN” San Jose years ago. There’s some appeal. Many thought the area was in transition, but I got the feeling that the progress of improvement had reached a ceiling and so the value and lure would be static at best. It also runs the risk of becoming a low income purgatory like EPA or east Menlo Park. And all these old homes in SJ smell like dust and urine.

    An aside, I thought this was funny:

    Tax (2009) $1,372

  2. nomadic Says:

    MOTIVATED SELLER.

    I should say so: 161 days on the market, a 4% price reduction four months ago (ooh, bad numbers!), and a failure to sell the last time they were on the market for four months during the end of the bubble in 2007.

    bwahahaha

  3. SEA Says:

    nomadic- With any luck, you’d better start baking cupcakes, and don’t forget the sprinkles.

  4. nomadic Says:

    Since when do I bake cupcakes?

  5. burbed Says:

    Dear SEA: All the emails I send to you (in reply to the ones you sent me) get bounced back automatically. You may want to investigate.

  6. SEA Says:

    burbed- Oh, ok. I’ll fix it tonight. I probably forgot to set it up right.

  7. SEA Says:

    nomadic- I guess I don’t care if you personally bake them, but please make sure they are RBA quality.

  8. madhaus Says:

    Why bake them when P— A— has both Sprinkles and Kara’s?

    nomadic doesn’t bake cupcakes, but I bet he can do a mean batch of magic brownies. With patchouli frosting.

  9. nomadic Says:

    I guess these references to baked goods are related to a comment I made a couple of months ago about having to write guest posts for burbed to earn Sprinkles cupcakes? I’ll share mine if I ever collect. ;-)

    In my neck of the woods, we prefer them from Icing on the Cake. They’re much better. I haven’t had them since LG got kicked out of the RBA though.

  10. SEA Says:

    I didn’t know you were suggesting someone else was going to pay. To be honest, I don’t frequent cupcake shops, but some of the young women I know seem to have a great appreciation of cupcakes.

  11. nomadic Says:

    To be honest, I don’t frequent cupcake shops, but some of the young women I know seem to have a great appreciation of cupcakes.

    Maybe you should.

  12. madhaus Says:

    If not SEA, Alex should try it. Cupcakes are even better than sandwiches.

  13. bob Says:

    They should also ad that for a ‘only’ $700,000 you also get a nice 1970′s or maybe early 80′s TV set. That’s retro baby, way better than any of those stupid modern flatscreens…

  14. anon Says:

    but, bob! You can buy an old 80s tv for 1/20th of the price of a new flat screen!

  15. Petsmart Groomer Says:

    bob is absolutely right – anything that’s electronic that does not run on tubes is kind of boring.

  16. madhaus Says:

    Heh. One of my amps is powered by vacuum tubes. It’s so retro but I bought it new in 2005.

    Not this one.

  17. Kim Says:

    This is the most nasty real estate blog I’ve ever read. I’m surprised that nobody has filed a lawsuit against you for slander.

    For the record, I live in Saratoga and know the Vendome area quite well because a few friends live there. Rankin and Ayer streets are full of beautiful houses. Did you ever visit the area? It’s more classy that Cupertino.

    There are a few bail bonds offices since the County jail and court are approx 1 mile from the area. That’s all.

    I know 2 attorneys and 3 engineers who reside on this street.

    Pl be careful with your writing. It’s not funny. Put yourself in the shoes of the vendor.

    btw, I’m not in the real estate business. I wonder if you hold grudges against the vendor or the listing agent.

  18. nomadic Says:

    Holy crap! This house is STILL for sale! Thanks for the heads up, Kim. When did a home seller become a vendor???

    Can you give us an example of something you find funny?

  19. DreamT Says:

    #18 – Vendor is Vietnamese for Seller. Hmm no, it’s nhà cung cấp vs người bán. How odd that Kim would make the confusion.

  20. Sunny(vale) Kim Says:

    Good to see another Kim. Kims are always geniuses. Kim Kardashian, Kim Jong Ill, Sunny(vale) Kim – you name it.

    This Rankin property is chasing the market down. From $669K to $550K – in 2 months!!!

  21. madhaus Says:

    Kim, thanks ever so much for bringing this property to our attention, what with this article running more than a year ago. So you’d like us to feature it again? New listing copy, new photos, but still many bail bond agencies conveniently located!

  22. SEA Says:

    On and off the market since May 18, 2007?

    Yes, yes, please be careful of what you say. It would be totally wrong if you suggested something that might be construed as most nasty.

  23. DreamT Says:

    “I know 2 attorneys and 3 engineers who reside on this street.”

    Someone write a light bulb joke, quick!…

    Ok here goes:
    Q: How does an engineer change a lightbulb?
    A: As long as lighting levels are within operational parameters, he doesn’t !

    Q: How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?
    A: How many can you afford?
    A: It only takes one to change your bulb…to his.
    A: None, lawyers only screw us.

  24. madhaus Says:

    Okay, I’ll try.

    There were 2 attorneys and 3 engineers who all lived on the same street. None of them maintained their homes, and all the light bulbs burned out.

    The first lawyer read the federal standards for incandescent bulbs, noticed 100 watts were no longer permitted, and sued the DOE.

    The second lawyer noticed the $50 LED bulb that won the L-prize was twice as much as LED bulbs built in Mexico, and hired an illegal alien to install the illegal light bulb.

    The first engineer obtained the ANSI standard on light bulbs, but couldn’t read it in the dark.

    The second engineer read the specs for halogen bulbs by the glare of his laptop.

    The third engineer went to the courthouse and bought the paper on the other four houses when they got foreclosed. One lawyer sued because the title was clouded. The other was looking for a bottle of Drano in the dark.

    A bail bonds specialist moved in next door once all the banks were done suing and acquiring each other.

    Hey, what happened to Kim?

  25. SEA Says:

    I suspect that #17 is looking for reasons to blame for the lack of sale. You know, if it were not for (fill in the blank), this property would have quickly sold for $1.1M (that’s the full $700k, plus over bidding). Now it’s getting a bit too close to our ‘not a lot of money’ standard for comfort.

    Note to vendor: A properly priced place will garner over bidding.

  26. SEA Says:

    “REGULAR SALE! Motivated Seller * * Home nested in a truly manificent & elegan vendome neighborhood, a rare find * * * Format entry, Seperate D/Room, Gracious L/Room w/ fireplace, French doors & windows * * Hardwood floors * * Partial basement * * Conveniently located, near light rail, Japan Town, minutes to freeways and shopping centers.”

    manificent, elegan & Seperate

    But it is a REGULAR SALE!

  27. SEA Says:

    About two blocks away and pending in under 10 days:

    178 Acacia St, with a listing price double 1988 selling price. Oh, and it’s down about 60% from 2006.

  28. very amused Says:

    This part of San Jose is “more classy that Cupertino”. THAT’S FUNNY!

    Cupertino is a few things, but classy? No.

    Did you mean the kids spend all their free time in after school study class?

  29. nomadic Says:

    #28, they certainly don’t appear to be studying spelling & grammar. #26 left out the “format” entry. The current agent should ask the previous agent to proof his copy.

  30. sfbubblebuyer Says:

    Good GOD what did they do that kitchen? Is that a black body oven with pink doors with green tile backsplash and countertops? It is? Well did they at least mount the kitchen faucet to the wall to make remodeling require major plumbing work? They did? Excellent.

  31. AstroWallaby Says:

    You have to cut #17 some slack. She lives in Saratoga. People are *special* in Saratoga.

    (Example here:

    http://chippep.blogspot.com/2009/08/traffic-excuses.html

    Search for the paragraph containing “Hi, Officer. I live here in Saratoga.”)

  32. nomadic Says:

    Bet that would have worked if she had said “I live in Palo Alto.”

  33. madhaus Says:

    Only if she had been too pretty to live in Saratoga.

  34. Sunny(vale) Kim Says:

    Well, you have to know where you are. If you are on street, Saratoga works better.
    If you are in airport, Palo Alto works better.

  35. AstroWallaby Says:

    I dunno, I’d be careful about telling a traffic cop I live in Palo Alto. They might think I mean “East Palo Alto”, instantly assume I’m singlehandedly responsible for the contents of the last week’s police blotter, and shoot me down like a dog.

    “BUT OFFICER! I live HERE! IN SARATOGA!”

  36. Truly manificent & elegan: It’s more classy that Cupertino [Burbed.com] Says:

    [...] the old listing.  This seems like a fairly typical treatment of a property with some lexically lacking listing [...]


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