Palo Alto house perfect for twitter and facebook employees
$3,288,000
Beds: 9 Baths: 6.5 Sq. Ft.: 4,627 $/Sq. Ft.: $711 Lot Size: 8,070 Sq. Ft. Property Type: Detached Single Family Style: Contemporary, French, Mediterranean Stories: 3 View: Mountains, Neighborhood Year Built: 2006 Community: Midtown County: Santa Clara MLS#: 81105993 Source: MLSListings Status: Active On Redfin: 12 days VERY NEW/ BEAUTIFUL 9 BD/6.5 BA; GREAT 4 TODAY’s LIFE/ENTERTAINMENT; PRIME LOCATION/QUIET 2Side CueDeSac ST; LOTS NEW HOUSE AROUND; FUNCTIONAL/FLEXIBLE FLR PLAN/RMs; 2 PRKG W 400 SF; GOMT KITCHEN; MASTERBR W SIT RM; TOPLINE MTL/APPLICANCES; THEATRE/DANCNG FLR; SAUNA; BAR; GYM, GAME RM; WINE C; LOTS FEATURES; HG CEILING; 2 GREAT ROOM/2 LAUNDRY; GRAND/BRIGHT/DETAILS; BIG FRONT/BACK YARD W PATIO/TRILLIS
Thanks to Burbed reader M for this find!
Here’s what M had to say:
I know we aren’t supposed to discuss the city which cannot be named, but this house is just so perfect.
http://www.mlslistings.com/2577-RAMONA-ST-Palo-Alto-CA~i19$1013434$RES
Love the agent’s grammar. He will make just $100,000 on this sale, so he clearly can’t afford keyboard that doesn’t produce all caps. Oops, there are a couple of words in there that aren’t, like "QUIET 2Side CueDeSac". What exactly is a CueDeSac? I’m guessing either a place to store your custom-made pool sticks, or a bag that hold
s your signals to go on stage. No matter, this house has LOTS FEATURES and is GREAT 4 TODAY’s LIFE/ENTERTAINMENT. Hey, there is also a "TRILLIS", which must mean something that supports the piano flourishes your little snowflakes can play. With nine bedrooms, everyone in a family of nine can have their own bedroom with one left over for the in-laws.I’m sure many people want to cook in a GOMT KITCHEN, no matter if it actually contains TOPLINE MTL or APPLIANCES.
Never had a sale since it was new in 2006. I guess it isn’t one of the LOTS NEW HOUSE AROUND. At this rate, it’s going to be Old Palo Alto without ever being lived in. Buy it now or be priced out forever!
Dude this house is totally aimed at all the Facebookers and Twitterers who are about to become rich! Know your customer! Speak their language! Shrt is betr. Drp lttrs to sv spce. TL;DR.
March 9th, 2011 at 5:46 am
VERY TASTEFUL!
March 9th, 2011 at 8:32 am
Nobdy talkin abt mrbl clmn at frnt!
March 9th, 2011 at 8:38 am
The description on Redfin has been revised:
BEAUTIFUL 9 or 5-7 BD/6.5 BA
I love how it can have 5, 6, 7 or 9 bedrooms. But not 8. Why no lucky number? Are they trying to keep Asians out so the PA schools don’t become concentrated with one demographic like Cupertino’s?
March 9th, 2011 at 8:44 am
“He will make just $100,000 on this sale”
My guess: No sale = No earned commission.
March 9th, 2011 at 8:49 am
Seller is Licensed Real Estate Agent
Bwahahahaha – she tried selling all through the height of the bubble too. Excellent pricing strategy, genius!
March 9th, 2011 at 8:56 am
A historic Google search indicates the price started at $3,578,888 in early 2006 and quickly reduced to – surprise! – $3,288,000. Hmmm. Where’s the appreciation for the last five years?
See ad with photo on p.10, from January ’06:
http://www.paloaltoonline.com/weekly/morguepdf/2006/2006_01_06.paw.section2.pdf
March 9th, 2011 at 8:59 am
“Where’s the appreciation for the last five years?”
Probably all the agents posting notes on the door about how great the house is, and each one would love to sell it. Now that’s housing appreciation!
March 9th, 2011 at 9:04 am
Damn. Gotta fix that hndl.
March 9th, 2011 at 9:08 am
Where was the planning department’s brain when this shitstain got approved? Finished square footage is over half of the lot size? Houses this big need half acre lots just to look stupidly oversized. You need an acre before the house will be scaled properly. And at least half the neighbors are/have done the same thing. The neighborhood is starting to look like a sardine can someone tried to stuff whole tunas into.
Also, who let the Architectural Flourishes Fairy go batshit crazy on this thing? It’s like the lego house you built that your little brother came along and kept adding onto until ALL the legos were gone. Thank god they didn’t have the Millennium Falcon kit or we’d have radar dishes and awkwardly mounted laser turrets on that bad boy.
Finally, a fountain in the middle of a sidewalk? Seriously? Somebody take a bat to the moron who dropped that turd in the middle of the walk.
March 9th, 2011 at 9:09 am
On Redfin: 28 days. Uh-huuuunh.
March 9th, 2011 at 9:11 am
See ad with photo on p.10, from January ’06:
—-
THE OTHR HM LSTED IN AD, 2916 RAMONA, DIDN’T SELL EITHER. CALL LYNN 650-815-8157 IF U WNT TO SELL U’R HM.
March 9th, 2011 at 9:33 am
This one was mine–but I forgot to use my burbed name–now there’s a concept.
@6:
The text in that ad is just as bad as the text in the listing:
“Big house on sized lot.”–Well I hope the lot is sized. Otherwise you don’t know what you are buying.
“Design for today’s life.”–If I live there I can design for today’s life.
March 9th, 2011 at 10:19 am
@9:
Even the description says that the house was designed by a schizophrenic architect:
“Style: Contemporary, French, Mediterranean”
This house is just comedy gold on all levels. From the agent to the architect to the planning commission. Everyone who has come near this house has dropped the ball.
Even the Weekly’s ad editors missed typos. Or maybe they don’t review them at all.
The pool of incompetence surrounding this house makes me afraid to even drive by. I’m afraid it is contagious.
March 9th, 2011 at 12:19 pm
Mawbul Cawlumns, check!
Fakie 3rd story-ish lump on top – check!
Lawyer foyer – check!
Snout – check!
This house is full ‘o’ win! Buy now!
March 9th, 2011 at 12:42 pm
12, 13: excellent find, I think this one ranks with the Mawbul Kawlum Extravaganza on Purissima.
9, you should be writing up the houses here. And so rarely do we remember to thank the architect for the finds on Burbed.
March 9th, 2011 at 12:53 pm
Finally, a fountain in the middle of a sidewalk? Seriously? Somebody take a bat to the moron who dropped that turd in the middle of the walk.
—-
That was inspired by Superior Chinese Mom Amy Chua. If unruly child runs out from front door, he/she is going to hit the fountain and succumb to head injury. Done! The “bad apples” are cleaned out from society. Only good apples stay in society – who always get A+ and don’t do sleepover.
March 9th, 2011 at 1:52 pm
#9 – beautiful post. classic.
yep, another plastic house
but – MR. MORTGAGE IS BACK!!! MR. MORTGAGE IS BACK!!!! YAYYYY!!! (*that* deserves all caps): http://mhanson.com/blog
he hadn’t posted in 10 months. he is a god of housing doom. now he goes by his real name, Mark Hanson
March 9th, 2011 at 3:01 pm
But Tuno, blow that doom away. This morning it was reported that mortgage applications are way up (well, to the highest level this year, never mind were only nine weeks into it)!
March 9th, 2011 at 4:05 pm
#17, thanks for reporting that. Either Burbed or me ought to get that link up on the blogroll. Here’s just a yummy taste:
March 10th, 2011 at 9:04 am
This poor house. So much going on. And on the wrong side of Oregon Expressway. I’m still trying to puzzle out QUIET 2Side CueDeSac ST too. There isn’t a cul de sac for at least a mile in any direction…
March 10th, 2011 at 9:18 am
#20- Go have another cup of coffee and come back. Ok, are you back now. Please note that the cul-de-sac on Ramona is 14 doors down.
March 10th, 2011 at 9:20 am
Oh, and since I might as well cover the other side of “2Side,” the other one is about 24 doors down.
March 10th, 2011 at 10:02 am
Okay, duly noted. The dead end at Oregon Expressway. Great selling point. And if the realtard can say it’s on a cul de sac, then using the same logic we can say it’s on the Caltrain tracks too. They’re about equi-distant.
March 10th, 2011 at 2:05 pm
Yea, maybe the honest assessment would be: “Surrounded by the Oregon Expressway, a drainage ditch, and Caltrain tracks.”
March 10th, 2011 at 7:30 pm
>>Where was the planning department’s brain when this shitstain got approved? Finished square footage is over half of the lot size?
Where is your brain? Didn’t you notice that this is a 3 story house with a full basement? There’s still plenty of space for yard. This kind of layout is very common in Palo Alto.
March 10th, 2011 at 8:00 pm
“Where is your brain?”
Uh oh, let’s hope this does not degenerate into anatomical horror, a la Daniel Tosh.
March 10th, 2011 at 10:33 pm
DreamT,
Why do you talk about some nonsense, rather than talking about the property?
March 10th, 2011 at 10:35 pm
Does it get any more circular than #27?
March 10th, 2011 at 10:48 pm
#28, that’s not circular. That’s hypocrisy. Circular would be a real cul-de-sac instead of a dead end.
March 10th, 2011 at 11:16 pm
RealEstater – frankly I am not interested in Palo Alto, and certainly not the above monstrosity. The only decent properties I have found around here were located in the Saratoga hills. But I’ve been told many times that I have old man’s taste.
March 11th, 2011 at 12:00 am
DreamT,
It’s a moot point anyways. You can’t touch this house in your dream.
March 11th, 2011 at 12:02 am
>>frankly I am not interested in Palo Alto,
Right, except for the libraries.
March 11th, 2011 at 12:07 am
#31 – Not a moot point. And I indeed wouldn’t.
#32 – The children’s library only, there’s nothing special about the others.
March 11th, 2011 at 12:48 am
>>The children’s library only, there’s nothing special about the others.
I suppose it depends on your reading level.
March 11th, 2011 at 12:49 am
Btw, Mitchell Library is being rebuilt from the ground up. It will be a state of the art library and meet your specialness criteria.
March 11th, 2011 at 1:34 am
That does it. I’m moving to Palo Alto!
March 11th, 2011 at 1:34 am
#34 – I don’t need to engrave my two kids’ name in its back alley to justify my presence there
#35 – I meant diversity and specialization of content, not architecture
March 11th, 2011 at 2:04 am
>>I meant diversity and specialization of content, not architecture
You think they’re rebuilding the library from the ground up just to put the same books back in?
March 11th, 2011 at 2:06 am
>> I don’t need to engrave my two kids’ name in its back alley to justify my presence there
You can’t justify it because you don’t have 2 kids.
March 11th, 2011 at 2:08 am
You’re way behind buddy!
March 11th, 2011 at 5:58 am
I, for one, cannot wait for the new library. Can’t wait to read Eat, Pray, Love while the husband is working late!
March 11th, 2011 at 7:13 am
Of course they will put new books in the Palo Alto Library–you know, all the new paradigms in Palo Alto real estate should fill the shelves. It’s not like the old finance books are applicable–let flyover land libraries house those old things.
Housing price appreciation is easy: It always doubles every 10 years or sooner–at least if the place is in the RBA. That only takes a couple of pages. The bulk of the pages attempts to describe the ever elusive RBA.
March 11th, 2011 at 5:47 pm
Los Gatos has a brand new library under construction too. I thought the librarian telling me about it was going to wet herself because she was so excited. Then again, if I had to work in the depressing tomb that’s the current library, I’d be pretty happy too.