Please, save your rotten tomatoes and rioting until the end. To celebrate the interment, er, I mean introduction of our new contributor, let’s make a day trip to beautiful scenic Santa Cruz.
Sq. Ft.: 1,317
$/Sq. Ft.: $235
Lot Size: 0.34 Acres
Property Type: Detached Single Family
Year Built: 1948
Community: Live Oak
County: Santa Cruz
On Redfin: 114 days
Non-Conforming Residential located on a parcel zoned M-1 Light Industrial. This property is located directly across from the ProBuild Door & Window Design Company. This property is eligible under the Freddie Mac First Look Initiative through 12.15.2010. Seller is offering a 2 year home warranty limitations, do apply ask for details.
Lionel Hutz: All right, gentlemen, I’ll take your case, but I’m going to have to ask for a thousand-dollar retainer.
Bart: A thousand dollars? But your ad says “No money down”.
Lionel Hutz: Oh, they got this all screwed up… (scribbles) “Works on contingency basis? No, money down!”
Bart: So, you don’t work on a contingency basis?
Lionel Hutz: No, money down! Oops, it shouldn’t have this Bar Association logo here either.
A comma can be a powerful thing. Let’s ignore the home warranty limitations for now, though, and focus on the property. We have some of the Burbed standbys: the low-maintenance lawn, garage pre-boarded for the next tsunami, and your very own dumpster, which has the added effect of harboring wildlife! This is truly the perfect house for Santa Cruz’ tender-hearted liberal sensibilities. You also have the possibility of using the house as a workshop, seeing how it has M-1 zoning. And look at the instant equity!
The last sale was for $425,000, before The Bubble even began. Clearly, then, that must be the baseline, because there could never have been any real estate bubble in California before The Bubble. No, The Bubble was a one-off that has never happened before and will never happen again!