November 10, 2011

HOW MUCH do you want CUPERTINO SCHOOLS?

Today’s listing is courtesy of Burbed reader Swan, who sends us a Sunnyvale spectacular.  That’s provided that by “spectacular” I really mean “OMG what a crapbox!”  Seriously, I have had my eye on this house for several years and have been waiting for it to get listed so I could share it here.

 

1035 W HOMESTEAD Rd, Sunnyvale, CA 94087
$899,999

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BEDS: 4
BATHS: 2
SQ. FT.: 1,890
$/SQ. FT.: $476
LOT SIZE: 7,171 Sq. Ft.
PROPERTY TYPE: Detached Single Family
STORIES: 1
YEAR BUILT: 1958
COMMUNITY: Sunnyvale
COUNTY: Santa Clara
MLS#: 81146339
SOURCE: MLSListings
STATUS: Active
ON REDFIN: 4 days

Very Nice Eichler with enclosed Attrium and Cupertino Schools, Spacious Living Room and Family Room w/ a gorgeous fireplce, Master Suite w/ Walk-In Closet, Tile, Attached 2 Car Garage, Large 7200sf lot with a Pool, Indoor Laundry, additional 500sf with enclosed Attrium not on MLS, West Valley Elementary, Cupertino Middle, Homestead High! This Home will sell fast, all offers considered. Needs TLC.

imageHere’s what Swan thought about this delightful domicile:

It’s on Homestead, right next to the entrance to the CMS [Cupertino Middle School] track.  My hubby and I have noticed this house for years as it becomes more and more run down.  I love how the agent says the home will sell fast.  I went by it on my bike the other day.  The house needs a new garage door, new fence, new roof, and who knows what else.  Though the agent did not go out of his way on the photos, he at least took them from an angle and from across the street to hide the poor condition of the home.

I agree that the price is insane. That home, especially the roof, has not been cared for in years. My husband is a contractor and every time we go by, he says, "That poor house."

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imageI am just happy the owners listed this place while it was still standing upright.  I don’t know when the Streetview shot above was taken, but it could hardly have gotten much better.

But that asking price? On what planet will this pile “sell fast”?  Are there really people out there that eager desperate for Cupertino schools?

Remember this place?  At least it’s on a court (right off another busy street) and it isn’t moving for $30K less, with lucky 8s instead of 9s).

imageI also love that this place has an Attrium that has an additional 500 sf not on MLS.  Maybe the realtard made a spelling oops and is really saying this house is full of expensive rare earths like Yttrium!  It must be important, because the Attrium is mentioned twice, just like the Cupertino schools.  I SAID CUPERTINO SCHOOLS, EVERYBODY!

Now, everybody into the pool!  Ahhhhhh.

So who would buy this?  Somebody who really, really, really wants those schools.  Somebody who wants them enough to put up with a busy street near a freeway interchange, a house falling to pieces, and the delightful shrieks of children being forced to run the mile over and over.

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Comments (16) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:09 am

16 Responses to “HOW MUCH do you want CUPERTINO SCHOOLS?”

  1. z2amiller Says:

    Amazing to me how houses that will sell for $800+K get into this condition. And the tax assessment on the place is ~580K so it isn’t like someone who’s been living there since the house was built in 1958. (Like this poor house: http://www.redfin.com/CA/Mountain-View/2400-Alvin-St-94043/home/1486798 )

    Maybe what we need are housing derivatives — sell a 2% stake in your house on the open market to get the cash for a roof or to fill in the pit of despair that has filled with rainwater and is now called a “pool”.

  2. nomadic Says:

    This house takes the idea of crapbox to an all-new level! I’m interested in the kind of person who pays over half a million dollars for a house and then lets it fall down around them. I don’t comprehend it.

  3. madhaus Says:

    Sold in 2003 for that $535K, which means it’s barely even worth that if you scraped the house off first.

  4. SEA Says:

    What happened to the days when the so-called owner could simply borrow another $250k?

  5. The Gilroy Alex Says:

    It’s just a box ….. with a frog pond and some ugly AC equipment on the roof. It looks ugly enough to be the locker rooms for the track, a place to keep relay batons, lost jock straps, and the infamous “slop box” where you get someone else’s cast-off gym shirt if you forgot to bring yours.

  6. Divasm Says:

    That house looks like where all the kids who smoke and shove 6th graders around hang out while cutting PE – it’s right next to the track so it’s super handy for all their delinquent activities. I hated those kids.

  7. madhaus Says:

    You know that really awful book The Fountainhead by Ayn Rand, about that selfish architect and how much better he was than everyone else?

    I bet this is what his buildings really looked like.

  8. sfbubblebuyer Says:

    Man, I hated that book. Not a single worthwhile character in it.

  9. madhaus Says:

    sfbubbeleh, click that link. I think you’ll enjoy it.

  10. nomadic Says:

    That link is fantastic, madhaus.

  11. The Gilroy Alex Says:

    #7-#10 +10,000 LOL!!!

  12. wahnny Says:

    #7, very funny (yet serious) take on The Fountainhead … thanks for the link!

  13. Divasm Says:

    I agree, that is some literary goodness right there.

  14. Real Alex Says:

    In Cupertino school district price does not matter, because there house sales you, no other way around. :P

  15. madhaus Says:

    Price reduced to $799K! What a bargain!

  16. R.A. Says:

    This house is pretty close to me. And it still looks like that in 2013. I had no idea it was an Eichler, it shows no architectural character whatsoever. It looks like a mobile home with junk added on to cover problems. What a mess.


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