It’s becoming more challenging to provide a good variety of listings on Burbed.  Readers from all over send in their nominations for housing fail.  We work our way through the inbox looking to produce a good mix of home types, locations, submitters, and price range.  Lately, by the time we’re ready to write up a reader-suggested domestic disaster, all traces of the listing have been removed from the MLS. 

Back in the post-bubble doldrums when sellers had to promise a years’ worth of weekly car waxes and grocery delivery, an accepted offer wouldn’t lead to the agent yanking photos and description.  So what’s happening now?  Listings are evaporating faster than a YouTube video with a DMCA takedown notice.  Is this just another sign that there’s so little inventory, the selling agents feel besieged?

Today’s featured property is a San Mateo teardown that didn’t collect any dust, courtesy of Burbed reader SMParkster.  And since Redfin’s removed the info, time to play eenie-meenie-miney-mo with the other real estate websites.  Today’s “winner” is Trulia, which we thank very much for taking their time.

249 West Poplar Avenue
San Mateo CA 94402
$2,250,000

Status: Pending
Bedrooms: 5
Bathrooms: 3
Property type: Single-Family Home
Size: 3,121 sqft
Lot: —
Price/sqft: $721/sqft
Year built: 1906
Added on Trulia: 18 days ago
Neighborhood: San Mateo Park
Zip: 94402

Absolutely spectacular estate in San Mateo Park. Sprawling lot size of 24,000 square feet. High-reaching palm trees and mature redwoods welcome guests as they approach the main house down a gently winding driveway. This truly unique offering has been carefully maintained by the same family for the last fifty years.

Here’s why SMParkster passed this carefully maintained winner along:

I walk past that property all the time and the lot is truly really nice, but the house is set back much much further than any other house in the neighborhood and I’ve always kind of wondered about the owners.

The MLS listing says the current owners have been there 50 years which doesn’t really surprise me.  I was just surprised that the asking price is about in line with what a decent house on that size lot would currently go for (I think) around here, but the house clearly needs either tearing down (what the real estate agent seems to be implying) or major updating at the very least.

More photos inside, so click on in!

(more…)

Some cities are more compliant than others in providing BMR (Below Market Rate) housing.  Perhaps Menlo Park will be getting off the “But we don’t have any below market residents” excuse pot.

Menlo Park eyes below-market rental housing

HIP Housing proposes deal with Menlo Park

by Sandy Brundage, Almanac Staff

The city of Menlo Park has its eye on a Willow Road apartment complex that might be purchased for use as below-market-rate rental housing — something that currently doesn’t exist in Menlo Park.

The 12-unit complex, located at 1157-1161 Willow Road, comes with a price tag of around $2 million, according to a representative from HIP Housing, a nonprofit organization that specializes in finding below-market-rate housing and hopes to partner with Menlo Park on the deal.HIP currently operates 13 rental properties in San Mateo County.

The Willow Road complex would rent nine units to people earning less than 50 percent of the regional median income of $81,300, and three units to those making less than 30 percent. Rent at the complex would fall in the range of $610 to $1,016, according to a staff presentation.

A real estate listing described the property as vacant and partially renovated; it also said the complex had won a renewable energy award for upgrades such as solar panels and efficient lighting. Laundry and parking are available on site.

The apartment buildings are not currently for sale (the first is pending, the second is merely delisted).  They were built in 1958.  If you want to dig deep into the offering memorandum for the two buildings, have a look at this PDF.  And check out the pictures.  Solar panels!  Sweet!

Assuming the rental numbers are correct, that would give this complex a rent ratio of 10.26.  BUY!!!!!!!!  Then again, I’m not sure I trust these numbers.  Notice something hinky here?

While Burbed has yet to amass a huge portfolio of investment property, even we can tell the difference between a 5 and a 50% vacancy rate.  This is another great reminder of how Real Estate Professionals deserve those hefty commissions, whether commercial or residential.

Discuss this neighborhood, older apartment homes like these, BMR housing, any Open Houses you visited, or anything else you can think of. Yes, this is your weekend open thread.

We haven’t visited Belmont for a while, so this find from Burbed reader Overheard in San Carlos was very much appreciated.  And this property going pending despite the inept presentation goes to show that anyone can succeed as a Realtard.  At least anyone can when the Peninsula is this hot, hot, hot!

3034 SAN JUAN Blvd
Belmont, CA 94002
$1,249,000

BEDS: 4
BATHS: 3.5
SQ. FT.: 3,120
$/SQ. FT.: $400
LOT SIZE: 0.3 Acres
PROPERTY TYPE: Detached Single Family
STYLE: Mediterranean
STORIES: 3
VIEW: Neighborhood
YEAR BUILT: 2004
COMMUNITY: Haskins Estates
COUNTY: San Mateo
MLS#: 81205312
SOURCE: MLSListings
STATUS: Pending Without Release
ON REDFIN: 73 days

GORGOUS 8 YR NEW MDETEREAN BEAUTY IN A UNBELVABLE PRVT BRTHTKNG CONTRY SETNG. ELEVATOR FOR YOUR MAJESTY’S CONVENIENCE TO A BRGHT AND CHEERFUL 4 BR 3.5 BTH FLR PLN. BALCONIES TO ENJY UR BBQ, WRK FRM HM OR READ A BOOK IN A PEACEFUL AND RICH SETNG. NU PNT, CRPT AND REFRBSHED HDWD FLRS, HI CEILNGS, REC LGHTS, OVRSIZE GRNT KITCHEN/PNTRY, LAVISH MSTR RM & BTH, LOFT IN GRG, EZ FWY ACSS TO SF, SJ, FSTR CTY.

While the agent correctly addressed Us as YOUR MAJESTY, We do not consider issuing decrees or declaring war on the East Bay to be WRK FRM HM.  The elevator is appreciated but the lack of a throne room makes this a poor Seat of State for Our Royal Self, Our Royal Family, Our Trusted Advisors, and Our 500 liveried retainers, guards, and servants.

Despite the LOFT IN GRG, We are not amused by the plastic stair protection.

88 S Broadway #2203, Millbrae, CA 94030
$698,800

The bar has been raised. Now, not only is it necessary and sufficient for the price of a property to defy gravity and be astronomically high – it has to violate space/time.

For example, let’s look at this condo that has a $625 HOA. What, you say? A $625 HOA? Surely this must be in SF and include some fine amenities? Uh… well… it’s in Millbrae and it comes with 2 parking spots. That’s kind of close.

But wait… this 1,241 square foot condo comes with a 2 Acre lot.

Wow! Does this condo have doors into the 5th and 6th dimension? I’m not quite sure how this works – but since the Bay Area is only occupied by smart people, there surely must be some who can explain this.

BTW, see how it says 80 days? It really means 8 microseconds. Time… space… it’s all altered.

The paradigm has shifted!

Recently, there was a rather notable marijuana bust in San Mateo that netted 530 plants, due to a tip from a “concerned citizen.”  Every one of us probably has some kind of self-appointed concerned citizen living in our neighborhoods, and it’s thanks to people like them that we can discover there’s a pot house in an otherwise quiet, suburban subdivision.

Like this one.  Someone recently updated the Redfin record despite it not changing hands in nine years.

Check out the neighborhood, courtesy of Zillow.  This does not look like the meth district.  And the house isn’t just on the West side of El Camino, it’s on the West side of Alameda.  And on the Peninsula, West means more prestige, more appeal, and more Real.  If any part of San Mateo is going to aspire to Real Bay Areahood, this is a good place to start looking.

The local San Mateo Patch has some helpful hints on how you too can be a concerned citizen and rat your neighbors out for running a grow house.  Here’s how to tell what they’re up to:

Manheimer and Alcantara encourage the help of citizens in locating neighborhood grow sites. Each suggested some indicators that there might be an operation in your neighborhood.

"You’d hear whirring noises," says Alcantara, "because they need to have filtration inside the house. They need to get the oxygen out, and the carbon dioxide in for the plants, so they have filtration systems set up.

Yes, definitely call 911 at the first sign of a ceiling fan.  Those fiendish fixtures are a gateway appliance to high-energy lamps.  Here are some more tips from the San Mateo police:

• Infrequent visits by individuals who stay for a couple hours and then leave.

Because everyone knows that suburban get-togethers last all the livelong day.

• Lights in the house appear to be regulated, and on timers. Sometimes, rooms inside seem perpetually lit.

I wonder who it was who suggested putting lights on timers (see Home Safety).

• Initial construction and the noise that comes from that work.

Because nothing says grow house like noise from contractors.

• A "skunky" marijuana odor, and other odors, such as those from mothballs, air fresheners or chlorine, which are used in an attempt to mask the marijuana smell.

In fact, call 911 if you smell anything other than the approved chocolate chip cookie dough used during Open Houses.

• Unusual garbage strewn across lawn. Items used for growing marijuana, such as wiring, PVC piping and nutrient containers, may be discarded and left around the house.

So that’s why we’re seeing so many nominations for the Burbed Good Housekeeping Tag of Approval.

• Windows covered in dark plastic or newspaper.

Better have them check out the goth teen across the street for the blackout curtains, too.

• Extra security, such as guard dogs, fences, or cars loitering for long periods of time.

Remember the words of Robert Frost: Bad neighbors make good fences.

Let us know about any questionable signs your neighbor is running something nefarious, or any interesting things you see when touring Open Houses.  This is an Open Thread, so open up.

1650 ROOSEVELT Ave
Redwood City, CA 94061

BEDS: 4
BATHS: 2
SQ. FT.: 900
$/SQ. FT.: $667
LOT SIZE: 3,200 Sq. Ft.
STORIES: 2
VIEW: Neighborhood
YEAR BUILT: 1959
COMMUNITY: Central Park
COUNTY: San Mateo
MLS#: 81202135
SOURCE: MLSListings
STATUS: Active
ON REDFIN: 66 days
Great Starter Investment! Or live in one unit and rent out other for mrtgage relief. Good West Side Location! Close to schools – shopping – transportation – and Recreation Center!

If that black SUV drove forward another foot, comic hijinx would ensue.

Personally, I love the idea that you can rent out the other for “mrtgage relief”. Doesn’t this mean that each of the units is only really 450 sqft? So you have a choice: “mrtgage relief” or actually having space to yourself. Fun choices!

I’m surprised the carport spots aren’t enclosed. That could provide additional relief!

But let’s face it, real relief is spelled “R-e-a-l B-a-y A-r-e-a”

Today’s luxe listing is all about location, location, location!  Many thanks to Burbed reader Overheard in San Carlos for passing along this plum place!

664 CHESTNUT St
San Carlos, CA 94070
$850,000

BEDS: 3
BATHS: 2
SQ. FT.: 2,920
$/SQ. FT.: $291
LOT SIZE: 7,350 Sq. Ft.
PROPERTY TYPE: Detached Single Family
STYLE: Mediterranean
STORIES: 2
VIEW: Neighborhood
YEAR BUILT: 1950
COMMUNITY: Howard Park
COUNTY: San Mateo
MLS#: 81207068
SOURCE: MLSListings
STATUS: Pending Without Release
ON REDFIN: 25 days

CHARMING 3 BEDROOM, 1.75 BATH HOME W/ FRM, HDWD FLRS THRU-OUT & 2 CAR TANDEM GARAGE. SPACIOUS LIVING RM W/ BRICK SURROUND FRPLC. SEP FRML DINING RM W/ ARCHED DOORWAY. RETRO 50′S STYLE EAT-IN KITCH W/ TILE COUNTER TOPS, PLENTY OF CABINETS, FREE STANDING RANGE/OVEN & REFRIG. 3 NICE SIZE BEDRMS ON MAIN LEVEL. DWNSTRS FULL BASEMENT W/ LAUNDRY AREA. 7350 SQ FT LOT/ZONED RM59

HRS OF ENTRTNMNT INSD & OUT.

BUNUS: RM-59 ZNG = “MLTPL FAM MED DNSTY.”  Which is great, because this place already looks more like an APT HSE.

IDEAL LOCN, WLK 2 LIB, CTY SVCS DWNTWN, CLS 2 EVRYTNG.

ESPLY POLCE STN.

Let’s finish out our workweek with a magnificent Menlo Park manse, courtesy of Burbed reader Moxie Girl.  And fortunately, Moxie has enough to say about this luscious listing that she’s sitting in as today’s Guest Blogger.

So please give her a big, warm, Real Bay Area welcome and enjoy this Burbed Guest Post!

1427 GARWOOD Way (Unable to map)
Menlo Park, CA 94025
$699,950

BEDS: 3
BATHS: 2.5
SQ. FT.: 1,655
$/SQ. FT.: $423
LOT SIZE: 4,503 Sq. Ft.
PROPERTY TYPE: Detached Single Family
STYLE: Traditional
STORIES: 2
VIEW: Neighborhood
YEAR BUILT: 2000
COMMUNITY: Middlefield to El Camino
COUNTY: San Mateo
MLS#: 81207110
SOURCE: MLSListings
STATUS: Active
ON REDFIN: 13 days

Fantastic like new 3BD/2.5BA for under $700,000 in Menlo Park. Spacious living area, hardwood floors, crown molding, new paint & carpets and beautiful kitchen wih granite counter top tiles, walk in pantry. Private yard with deck & grass area. Close to downtown. Price is right!

I found another gem. This one is based in Menlo Park, for which I have deep affection, having worked and briefly rented there for some years. But hold the train (literally), folks, here is an RBA winner. Now this is clearly a steal: RBA real estate in the highly desired downtown Menlo Park area, and such a bargain it’s priced for $699,950, which just squeaks by at $50 under $700,000. But how can this be, you ask? Surely nothing in the desirable 94025 zip code can be for sale for such a ridiculously low price! Au contraire, mon ami.

Now, the first glaring bit of information that is odd is the “unable to map” in the header line of the address. Clearly the real estate agent thinks savvy buyers are incapable of mapping the true address of this property.

Luckily for us, one of Redfin’s cracking real estate team does note from a tour last September that the property is literally next door to a PG&E power facility. AND, based on the Google map…within about 20 steps of Caltrain train tracks. That’s right. Southern view/bedroom window: power facility; eastern view/from front door: gravelly train tracks. So you’ll be humming and/or rattling to your heart’s content as you revel in the fact that you are now living in the sought-after 94025 zip code you always longed for.

Well played, “Eliz. Bianchini, Coldwell Banker-Woodside” (from Redfin listing). Can we really trust someone to publish correct information about a listing when she can’t be bothered to fully spell out her first name? Just wondering.

If you take a look at the right column, you may have noticed the Category list of all the different kinds of postings covered on Burbed.  Most of them are place names: cities, counties, and San Jose neighborhoods.  With six years of content on the site, there’s still plenty of filing to clean up, and I’m always finding older pieces that weren’t classified correctly.

So while doing a little housekeeping around here, I was rather stunned to find just how little love Burbed had shown to Foster City. Despite the large number of San Mateo County properties featured here, there’s been exactly one house in FC given some proper Burbed attention.  How could that have happened?  Did the Foster City Board of Real Estate Agents make our hosting service an offer that they’re now priced out of forever?

Anyway, it’s time to fix this oversight.  Today we have a find from the City that isn’t just By The Bay, it’s built right over it!

1049 EGRET St
Foster City, CA 94404
$600,000

BEDS: 5
BATHS: 2
SQ. FT.: 1,930
$/SQ. FT.: $311
LOT SIZE: 5,700 Sq. Ft.
PROPERTY TYPE: Detached Single Family
STORIES: 1
VIEW: Neighborhood
YEAR BUILT: 1965
COMMUNITY: Bay Vista
COUNTY: San Mateo
MLS#: 81144613
SOURCE: MLSListings
STATUS: Pending With Release
ON REDFIN: 133 days

Great family home in nice and quiet location. Lots of bedrooms & sqft. Clean and well maintained. 2 master suites.

Oh, there’s the problem with this home selling.  Too many 4s in the zip code, plus a “bunus” one in the street address.  Somebody must have made an offer based on these wonderful photographs instead.  I especially like the artist’s use of light here.

And what better way to comment on the anomie of life on soft landfill than these disjoint pieces of furniture in the bedroom?  Why, by contrasting it with this bustling bathroom, complete with symbolic bright red cup as the focal point.  Readers are invited to surmise just what it represents.

Plus handy, escape-proof enclosures in both front and back yards, to contain small children and/or vigorous houseplants.  “Bunus”: Never have to yell at neighbor kids to stay off your lawn!

Today’s fantastic find has been brought to you by Burbed reader Pralay.  Remember, if you find a listing that makes you wonder how some real estate agents could call themselves professionals, send it in!  We’ll show it as much Real Bay Area love as we can.

269 OCONNOR St
Menlo Park, CA 94025
$1,470,000

BEDS: 5
BATHS: 5
SQ. FT.: 2,615
$/SQ. FT.: $562
LOT SIZE: 10,822 Sq. Ft.
PROPERTY TYPE: Detached Single Family
STYLE: Contemporary
STORIES: 1
VIEW: Neighborhood
YEAR BUILT: 2008
COMMUNITY: Willows/O’Conner Area
COUNTY: San Mateo
MLS#: 81151036
SOURCE: MLSListings
STATUS: Active
ON REDFIN: 61 days

150 ft long private tree lined drive way leads to this 3-yr new custom built nestled in matured trees. 1 story home w/ 5br, 5baths. 1/4 acre lot, Min. 9′ceilings, 8′doors. Gourmet Kitchen, Crown Molding, hdwd flr, A/Cm intercom, central vacuum, alarm, custom steel entry door, Sub zero refrig, body sprays. .. & more. ..

Here’s what Pralay had to say about this Menlo Park pick:

There are some interesting properties in this area. Essentially it is a house in someone else’s backyard. I am not sure how the lot size be 10,822 sqft. It that *was* the lot size was divided into two? "Custom built", "Gourmet Kitchen", "Crown Molding", "Custom steel entry door" and most importantly "Sub zero refrig". Built in 2008. Too bad, the owner is not able to enjoy for little bit longer time, as he has to sell it to cash in "Facebook effect".

Wow, a 150 foot driveway!  That means you get to drive past the house in the front yard.  But the best way to check on how true the quarter acre lot claim is?  Zillow.

Zillow makes it easy to click on every house in a neighborhood and quickly see the important numbers, including house and lot size.  And that claimed property area looks reasonable, given what the surrounding measurements show.  We’ve seen homes piled three deep on one lot while the agent claims every square foot of the original grounds. Alas, that didn’t happen here.

But all is not lost with this listing, despite the 10,000 foot lot size being completely legit.  By going to the Zillow map, we also notice the lovely mansions right over the back fence, complete with Palo Alto address, Eastern division. 

So you can assure your colleagues that you have arrived, because you’re in a neighborhood of much more expensive 32 bedroom homes.