88 S Broadway #2203, Millbrae, CA 94030
$698,800

The bar has been raised. Now, not only is it necessary and sufficient for the price of a property to defy gravity and be astronomically high – it has to violate space/time.

For example, let’s look at this condo that has a $625 HOA. What, you say? A $625 HOA? Surely this must be in SF and include some fine amenities? Uh… well… it’s in Millbrae and it comes with 2 parking spots. That’s kind of close.

But wait… this 1,241 square foot condo comes with a 2 Acre lot.

Wow! Does this condo have doors into the 5th and 6th dimension? I’m not quite sure how this works – but since the Bay Area is only occupied by smart people, there surely must be some who can explain this.

BTW, see how it says 80 days? It really means 8 microseconds. Time… space… it’s all altered.

The paradigm has shifted!

1021 SEQUOIA Ave
Millbrae, CA 94030

$1,070,000

Nothing says Millbrae pride like a house with parking.

Now, I know that real estate in the Valley doesn’t have to follow any rules – in fact, we’re outright encouraged to break the rules!

So I think this house excels in breaking the rules of physics. Just how do you fit 3 cars in a garage like that? Shouldn’t it be an even number?

Or, maybe this reflects some new origami practice? Or car elevator! oooh! The mind boggles!

By the way, they’re not kidding about the shed in the back being large:

What a green, green, lawn!

50 MATEO Ave
Millbrae, CA 94030

$299,000

Didn’t get what you wanted for Christmas? Well here’s your chance! Look at this deal! Most of us could charge this on our Centurion cards, right?

Let’s take a look at some of the fine interior pics:

Wow, talk about #winning! Unfortunately, the Iraq War is now over – so references to Fallujah and etc are now over. What would be a good modern day comparison for this house?

In any case, at $650 per square foot, this house demonstrates the awesome power of the Bay Area. Maybe you could buy this and create your new social, gamification, hyper local, daily deal, analytics, heroin shooting gallery! Just think of the potential! It’d be so addictive and viral! You could call it BlackTarr.com. (Please remember me for Friends and Family Shares. Thanks!)

Let’s visit Millbrae again, because it needs some Burbed love.  Simply mentioning it in passing because its zip code was the 366th most expensive in the county will not do for keeping Millbrae in our sights.

Fortunately, Burbed Reader Paul has found us a wonderful wishing price washout, showing what happens when sellers expect a particular price and the market fails to comply.  Thanks very much, Paul!

1388 BROADWAY #186, Millbrae, CA 94030
$599,000

BEDS: 2
BATHS: 2
SQ. FT.: 1,147
$/SQ. FT.: $522
LOT SIZE: –
PROPERTY TYPE: Condominium
STYLE: Contemporary
STORIES: 1-3 (Low Rise)
VIEW: Neighborhood
YEAR BUILT: 2009
COMMUNITY: Millwood
COUNTY: San Mateo
MLS#: 81141887
SOURCE: MLSListings
STATUS: Active
ON REDFIN: 61 days

Sophisticated living in the heart of Millbrae. Built in 2009, this Garden Level 2br/2ba condo offers approx 1147 sqft of living space. The gourmet kitchen is decked out with beautiful granite counter tops and backsplashes and a myriad of energy-efficient features. The interior is spacious and full of light. Common areas include multiple landscaped courtyards, a spa, barbeque area, & gym.

When Paul first sent this listing in, the asking price was $628,000, so after a month, with great trepidation, the sellers decided to cut the price all the way to… $615,000.  This did not lead to a packed Open House, flyers going through windows, and overbidding bringing offering prices right where they need to be.  So our dauntless sellers, guided by their brilliant and knowledgeable agent, took another deep (2.5%) price cut to the bone!  $599K!

Here’s how Paul described it:

Hey, the folks just down the street at 151 El Camino are selling new units in the $600s—we should get AT LEAST as much! Just because we bought near the market peak doesn’t mean we can’t walk with $100k of profit today! And besides, we have 2 parking spaces to their 1 (which you’ll need because it’s too far to walk to BART).

I chatted with the agent and he confirmed that the sellers were pretty clear on the price they wanted to list at… best of luck to them. Maybe they find a willing victim in the low $500s?

Paul should have mentioned that the $525,000 sale was in 2009.  Everyone knows that was a market low, and it’s completely reasonable to expect a $100K $74K profit from the year the credit dried up.

Also I really like this picture of the kitchen, with the mid-oughties trifecta of granite, stainless, and hardwood (or at least Pergo).

Today’s Guest Blog is a feature by Burbed reader Divasm!  Thanks very much for this passionate post complete with onsite photos in the location, location, location setting of Millbrae.  So close to the airport, so convenient to international travel, and just minutes from SFO!

Remember, we love guest columns at Burbed (less work for us!) so if you have a listing you want to do justice to, you too can be on the front page!  Our contact info is at the top of the right column.

Waaaaaaay over here ————————————————————————————————————————->

And now, stop your typing and mousing and put your hands together for Divasm!

 

987 VISTA GRANDE Ave, Millbrae, CA 94030
$849,950

BEDS: 4
BATHS: 3
SQ. FT.: 2,080
$/SQ. FT.: $409
LOT SIZE: 7,200 Sq. Ft.
PROPERTY TYPE: Detached Single Family
STYLE: Traditional
STORIES: 2
VIEW: Neighborhood
YEAR BUILT: 1953
COMMUNITY: Highlands
COUNTY: San Mateo
MLS#: 81139349
SOURCE: MLSListings
STATUS: Active
ON REDFIN: 26 days

Large 4 Br, 3 Bth home with spacious family room with full bar, on large lot. Kitchen has been updated, as have all 3 bathrooms. New carpets and painted interior. Green belt view from large picture windows in living room. Large attached 2 car garage with a large side room used as a work shop, and another side room for storage.

Dear Millbrae,

After last weekend’s round of open houses, we need to talk. Your proximity to San Francisco, your highly-scoring schools, all made you seem so attractive on the surface. You’re not as stuffy or pricey as Burlingame, not as ghetto as South San Francisco, not as housing tract-y as Daly City, and there’s no major gas pipeline activity (well, no more than normal). Perfect, right?

WRONG. I’ve tried and tried to make this work! I’ve been to open houses so close you can hear 280, and so near to El Camino you can smell the fast food. Houses priced comparably low because they’re right next to Capuchino High School (yet your kids go to Mills, because Capuchino is the low-scoring San Bruno school), and houses priced absurdly high for being on a major street…but oh wait, it’s Trousdale.

This last one on Vista Grande wasn’t a spectacular failure, it was just another stupidly priced for it’s bad layout house. But somehow I can’t take it anymore. WHY are you charging $849,950 (was $849,000 but they upped it that 950…why not 888, I ask?) for a house that looks like every house in Daly City on the outside? On a street that is super narrow with a view of the airport?

And what is with that Winchester mystery house stairway leading to a brick wall at the bottom with a metal plate that opens to a cubby in the wall? And then, the piece to resistance, off that stairway, that wood-paneled, linoleum-tiled, rock-lined disaster of a room…what IS that? From one side it looks like someone’s sick idea of a dojo, then we see the bar and sports on the TV and think somebody’s trying to open a club in their basement…WTF is THAT, Millbrae, huh???

Regardless, I didn’t stick around to check out the power lines over the steep backyard or compete with the many buyers on cell phones to foreign investors, I simply threw up my hands and left. For good this time, Millbrae, I mean it.

I’m delighted to invite Burbed reader Divasm back to the front page as today’s Guest Blogger.  Unlike all the many deluded sellers out there with wishing prices straight out of 2006, today’s home has had not one, but two price reductions since this piece was first sent in!

Please give Divasm a big, warm Real Bay Area welcome, with this rather, um, interesting-looking listing from SFO del Sur, or as it’s called on Google Maps, Millbrae!

One more thing: Yeah, I know it’s Labor Day today.  So what?  You should consider yourself fortunate if you still have a job.  Why the hell do you expect a day off, too?  Do you see THIS BLOG taking a day off?  Damned communists!  I’m sure there’s someone in an offshore telecenter someplace who’d be delighted to mangle most of your job responsibilities for eighty cents an hour.

Now get back to work!

200 PALM Ave, Millbrae, CA 94030
Was $1,488,888, then $1,148,888, now $1,098,888

BEDS: 3
BATHS: 2.5
SQ. FT.: 2,100
$/SQ. FT.: $523
LOT SIZE: 5,760 Sq. Ft.
PROPERTY TYPE: Detached Single Family
STYLE: Spanish
STORIES: 2
VIEW: Neighborhood
YEAR BUILT: 1935
COMMUNITY: Highlands
COUNTY: San Mateo
MLS#: 81133416
SOURCE: MLSListings
STATUS: Active
ON REDFIN: 35 days

Spanish style home with large master bedroom suite addition. Features family room , large yard , three car garage , large yard with deck. Dual paned windows, hardwood floors , close to downtown and schools.

I had the pleasure of visiting this million-plus-dollar mansion (well, 3/2.5, 2100 sq feet actually) recently at an open house. I had to see for myself if this abode in Millbrae, originally listed at 1,488,888 (recently lowered to $1,148,888) was really worth that much more than Zillow’s median of $933k.

Well, the bad news is there’s no bidet. But, the agent on site was quick to tell everyone that almost everything in the house is new or redone, and to prove it, there are blueprints and specs on the dining room table for your perusing pleasure, which prove that the teeny tiny kitchen you see in photo 5 of the listing (right) is actually new!

And that spacious backyard? State of the art basketball court, look for yourself! But even better, they don’t even mention that the utility room doubles as an office!

It’s clearly a mystery why this place hasn’t sold yet, especially with all those 8s in the price…unless…it’s the 4! Everyone knows 4s are very bad luck, if they just raise the price to $1,888,888, it should move immediately. That’s my prediction, you heard it here first.

Update: Hey, price just went down again on this house – it’s now 1,098,888. Two price reductions in a month! It would have been so much better if it had stayed at 1,488,888 though, that’s just obscene.

$1,275,000

 

245 CASTENADA Dr Millbrae, CA 94030

 

Beds:	3
Baths:	2
Sq. Ft.:	1,770
$/Sq. Ft.:	$720
Lot Size:	0.35 Acres
Property Type:	Attached Single Family
Style:	Contemporary
Stories:	1
View:	Neighborhood
Year Built:	1958
Community:	Mills Estate
County:	San Mateo
MLS#:	81123602
Source:	MLSListings
Status:	Active
On Redfin:	4 days

Beautiful 3 Bedroom 2 Bath home completely remodeled with Upgraded appliances, Hardwood floors, Dual pane windows, custom lighting and solid core doors throughout. Beautiful landscaping front and rear with Solar heated pool and Hot tub. All brick rear patios and retaining wall. 250 square foot bonus room. No rear neighbors.

Further proof that the Bay Area is back my friends. Check out this $1.3M house – in particular, the fine photos selected. Are these “F You It’s a Seller’s Market” photos? Or are these photos for this season’s Ghost Hunters? I’m thinking the former, but you never know.

Personally, my favorite photo in the series is this one:

Does anyone know any curators at SF MOMA? If this piece doesn’t belong there, I don’t know what does.

What would you call this piece? I’m thinking “No rear neighbors”. Boom! An instant classic!

91 CONEJO Dr Millbrae, CA 94030

$979,999

Beds:	3
Baths:	2
Sq. Ft.:	2,640
$/Sq. Ft.:	$371
Lot Size:	0.48 Acres
Property Type:	Detached Single Family
Style:	Contemporary
Stories:	1
View:	Bay, Neighborhood
Year Built:	1964
Community:	Mills Estate
County:	San Mateo
MLS#:	81035900
Source:	MLSListings
Status:	Active This listing is for sale and the sellers are accepting offers.
On Redfin:	12 days

Great Fantastic House Pool , Huge Back Yard.

Thanks to Burbed reader SW for this find!

Here’s what SW had to say:

I’m not sure if Millbrae is RBA or not, but there’s something special about a short sale on a place asking 2X its last selling price.

Combine that with the epic realtor description- "Great Fantastic House Pool , Huge Back Yard.", and you’ve got yourself a winner.  That great fantastic house pool happens to be green.  Not like environmentally aware green.  Like teeming with polywogs, malarial vectors and clumps of blooming algae green.

Let’s take a look!

I think the listing forgot to say that this is an “organic” pool.

311 EL PASEO Ave Millbrae, CA 94030

$799,900

Beds:	2
Baths:	1
Sq. Ft.:	1,300
$/Sq. Ft.:	$615
Lot Size:	5,664 Sq. Ft.
Property Type:	Detached Single Family
Style:	Traditional
Stories:	Bi/Split Level
View:	Neighborhood
Year Built:	1942
Community:	Highlands
County:	San Mateo
MLS#:	81036820
Source:	MLSListings
Status:	Active This listing is for sale and the sellers are accepting offers.
On Redfin:	7 days

Gingerbread Split Level Millbrae Highlands Home! Large living room with fireplace, hardwood floors. Formal dining room hardwood floors. Kitchen with breakfast nook and family room. Two large bedrooms and bathroom. Large utility room with laundry area. Bonus room. One car attached garage. Large covered patio, deck, brick walkways, garden/tool shed. Adjacent to Spur Trail. Close in location.

Thanks to Burbed reader J.W. for this find.

Wow… it’s a “gingerbread” house! I bet it’s full of surprises!

I’m going to bet that this fireplace is a secret passage to a magical place. One where houses will appreciate 15% year over year in Millbrae.

Um…. so… yeah… there’s this floating desk….

Uh… yeah… so there’s this jail for toddlers…

… and you reach it all by climbing the ladder out of the tub!

What the heck??

$300,000

50 MATEO Ave Millbrae, CA 94030

Beds:	1
Baths:	1
Sq. Ft.:	460
$/Sq. Ft.:	$652
Lot Size:	2,500 Sq. Ft.
Property Type:	Detached Single Family
Style:	Contemporary
Stories:	1
View:	Neighborhood
Year Built:	1920
Community:	Marino Vista Park
County:	San Mateo
MLS#:	81030858
Source:	MLSListings
Status:	Active This listing is for sale and the sellers are accepting offers.
On Redfin:	13 days

Fantastic opportunity here!!!!!! Lowest price single family home in Millbrae. One bedroon one bath one car garage . Close to shopping and transportation,