November 9, 2011

Burbed Returns to Rivermark

A couple of years ago, Burbed featured this fine Rivermark house at a rather startling price.  Unfortunately, nobody took advantage of this amazing offer, and the home was withdrawn from MLS at the end of 2009.


Fortunately, this listing is back and better than EVEH!  Ladies and gentlemen, Burbed proudly presents Rivermark 2011, The Sequel, now in living… um, what?

4160 RIVERMARK Pkwy, Santa Clara, CA 95054


BATHS: 3.5
SQ. FT.: 2,989
$/SQ. FT.: $383
LOT SIZE: 3,484 Sq. Ft.
PROPERTY TYPE: Detached Single Family
STYLE: Contemporary
VIEW: Neighborhood
COMMUNITY: Santa Clara
COUNTY: Santa Clara
MLS#: 81145878
STATUS: Active
ON REDFIN: 6 days

Rivermark Promenade II Arcade Floor Plan; Prime lot; 10 foot ceilings; Downstairs den/office can be used as a bedroom; The back studio suite (approx. 515 sq ft over the garage with a full bath & private entrance) could be rental unit/game room/home office/guest quarters; Stainless steel appliances, granite slab counter island & beautiful maple cabinets, Jacuzzi, pre-wired speakers, 3-Zone AC/Heat.

imageWhat an amazingly versatile property!  The downstairs den/office, as if it doesn’t already promise dual-use, can also be used as a bedroom!  The back studio suite could be a rental unit, or a game room, or a home office (wait, don’t you already have a den or bedroom that could be an office?  Too many choices!!!) or even guest quarters!  Imagine what that granite slab counter island could be used for?  Maybe a butcher shop or a pathologist’s table?  Why, the possibilities are endless!

imageIt looks like the agent hired Alin Ciorta to photograph the exterior this time around.  Good move!  The previous cover shot said “Tract construction somewhere in California.”  This photo says “artistic impression representing the contradiction of permanence.”  Or maybe it says “Where’s the goddamned focus knob?”

Unfortunately, the rest of the 2009 pictures seem to have kicked the bit bucket, but as a consolation prize, the sellers have thrown in a completely unreadable floorplan.

Best of all, this house is at the same bargain 2009 price, minus the lucky 8s!  That’s because the sellers are passing on all the luck DIRECT TO YOU. 

If you had any doubt that the Bay Area was HOT, HOT, HOT, this should settle all doubts.  Rivermark is IT and you STILL aren’t good enough.

Comments (12) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:04 am

September 29, 2011


Many thanks to Burbed reader AstroWallaby, for calling out today’s spectacular house in comments.  Drop by anytime, Astro, if you have more of these!


2450 MCLAUGHLIN Ave, San Jose, CA 95121


SQ. FT.: 1,152
$/SQ. FT.: $955
LOT SIZE: 0.83 Acres
PROPERTY TYPE: Detached Single Family
COMMUNITY: South San Jose
COUNTY: Santa Clara
MLS#: 81133489
STATUS: Active
ON REDFIN: 44 days


imageTired of living in a cooped-up apartment?  Hate hearing neighbors through walls?  Maybe you need some elbow room, and you’ll fit plenty of elbows here.  Haven’t you heard?  This is a very rare finding property.  Also the agent is USING ALL CAPS because he can’t believe this one isn’t a short sale or REO.

That means faster turnaround time for YOU to MAKE YOUR DREAMS COME TRUE because the bank won’t be throwing roadblocks at you every step of the way.  You can definitely make a lot of dreams come true with this much space, as long as your dream included South San Jose.  But it says OPPORTUNITY !!! three times.

So why are you still here? Go! Go!

Comments (29) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:55 am

September 5, 2011

How many 8s does it take to cancel a 4?

I’m delighted to invite Burbed reader Divasm back to the front page as today’s Guest Blogger.  Unlike all the many deluded sellers out there with wishing prices straight out of 2006, today’s home has had not one, but two price reductions since this piece was first sent in!

Please give Divasm a big, warm Real Bay Area welcome, with this rather, um, interesting-looking listing from SFO del Sur, or as it’s called on Google imageMaps, Millbrae!

One more thing: Yeah, I know it’s Labor Day today.  So what?  You should consider yourself fortunate if you still have a job.  Why the hell do you expect a day off, too?  Do you see THIS BLOG taking a day off?  Damned communists!  I’m sure there’s someone in an offshore telecenter someplace who’d be delighted to mangle most of your job responsibilities for eighty cents an hour.

Now get back to work!

200 PALM Ave, Millbrae, CA 94030
Was $1,488,888, then $1,148,888, now $1,098,888


BATHS: 2.5
SQ. FT.: 2,100
$/SQ. FT.: $523
LOT SIZE: 5,760 Sq. Ft.
PROPERTY TYPE: Detached Single Family
STYLE: Spanish
VIEW: Neighborhood
COMMUNITY: Highlands
COUNTY: San Mateo
MLS#: 81133416
STATUS: Active
ON REDFIN: 35 days

Spanish style home with large master bedroom suite addition. Features family room , large yard , three car garage , large yard with deck. Dual paned windows, hardwood floors , close to downtown and schools.

photo 2I had the pleasure of visiting this million-plus-dollar mansion (well, 3/2.5, 2100 sq feet actually) recently at an open house. I had to see for myself if this abode in Millbrae, originally listed at 1,488,888 (recently lowered to $1,148,888) was really worth that much more than Zillow’s median of $933k.

imageWell, the bad news is there’s no bidet. But, the agent on site was quick to tell everyone that almost everything in the house is new or redone, and to prove it, there are blueprints and specs on the dining room table for your perusing pleasure, which prove that the teeny tiny kitchen you see in photo 5 of the listing (right) is actually new!

photo 3And that spacious backyard? State of the art basketball court, look for yourself! But even better, they don’t even mention that the utility room doubles as an office!

photo 4

It’s clearly a mystery why this place hasn’t sold yet, especially with all those 8s in the price…unless…it’s the 4! Everyone knows 4s are very bad luck, if they just raise the price to $1,888,888, it should move immediately. That’s my prediction, you heard it here first.


Update: Hey, price just went down again on this house – it’s now 1,098,888. Two price reductions in a month! It would have been so much better if it had stayed at 1,488,888 though, that’s just obscene.

photo 1

Comments (15) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:09 am

August 30, 2011

Fastest Flip in the West!

Just last week, Burbed reader and frequent Guest Blogger Divasm shared with us the tale of the teenaged sleepover, complete with beer and boys, discovered while touring a house for sale.  But Big D visited the place a few weeks ago, and waited until the house sold before sharing it here.

Yesterday, the property was back on the listing service.  So I’ve asked Divasm to please give us a report on Stony Hill 2.0.  Before I do, here’s a look at Stony Hill 1.0 from last week.


Now please give D your biggest, warmest Real Bay Area welcome!

926 STONY HILL Rd, Redwood City, CA 94061


SQ. FT.: 2,130
$/SQ. FT.: $562
LOT SIZE: 7,840 Sq. Ft.
PROPERTY TYPE: Detached Single Family
STYLE: Ranch
VIEW: Bay, Neighborhood
COMMUNITY: Farm Hills Estates
COUNTY: San Mateo
MLS#: 81137487
STATUS: Active
ON REDFIN: 1 day

You will love this gorgeously updated 4/3 flexible floorplan home. Enjoy new kit w/ granite, stainless appliances inc. 36″ italian gas range. New baths, hardwood, new windows. Backyard views from deck & lush lawn. Spacious living & family rooms w/ fireplaces. Slate walkways & porch. Awesome nghbrhd & Roy Cloud school. Open House 8/29 from 5-7pm w/ wine & cheese. Virtual tour & more photos tonight.

SHspreadLadies and Gentlemen, it’s the event of the season, the wait is over…yes, that’s right, I give you the FASTEST FLIP IN THE WEST! In 29 days, we went from “pass the PBR,” to “Pardon me, would you happen to have any Grey Poupon?” Last night’s opening reception for this newly remodeled RBA home featured a spread of enough food to win over even the most cranky neighbor (probably kept up 24/7 with construction noises).

shbacklawnCouldn’t make it to the gala? Never fear, we’re here to fill you in…behold the new backyard! Every single piece of vegetation (especially the trees) appears to have disappeared, replaced by this lovely patio and lawn big enough for your child to frolic!

And don’t forget the bartender…yes, you read that correctly…to serve you celebratory champagne! 926 Stony Hill, you’ve come a long way from discarded pizza boxes in the basement, baby!


Speaking of dingy basements, it’s now split into two rooms – a game room and a guest room/family room.



And the front yard, well, I am still confused about how they appeared to actually level the street, I feel like it’s something you’d see at the Exploratorium. The house layout is much the same, as it turns out, just completely redone, refloored, repainted – to the point of being rather amazingly unrecognizable. This all courtesy of Sequoia Realty Services, which seems to consist of some grouping of these folks we see in the listing:

  • SHcrackAgent has Financial Interest
  • Seller is Licensed Real Estate Agent
  • Broker has Financial Interest

Speaking of repainted, the contractor said the foundation issues turned out to be cosmetic, by which it appears he meant “I painted over the cracks” – you might recognize the old crack, but now it’s sage colored! So much better on the eyes. But the floors upstairs are indeed level, so perhaps the issues weren’t such a big deal. Go ahead and plunk down your $1.2 mil and find out. If you serve PBR at your housewarming party we can make it the Burbed event of this Fall!

Comments (23) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:16 am

July 19, 2011

Albion Castle produces 10,000 gallons a day of spring water

Today we have another terrific find from Burbed reader sonarrat!  Unfortunately, it’s been sitting in my inbox so long it’s growing mold, and what’s worse, those fickle sellers have yanked it from Redfin!  So, if you could convince them to sell again, how would you like your own castle?

881 Innes Ave, San Francisco, CA 94124


DAMN, missed it!  And look at the location it’s in, too!  Sounds classy! Foxhounds and riders and horns, oh my!  Here’s what sonarrat had to say about the place:

Albion Castle.. produces 10,000 gallons a day of spring water.. sounds great! …it’s WHERE??!

It’s in San Francisco! Let’s see where exactly… after the break, because I’ve got more to show you.


Comments (9) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:09 am

July 14, 2011

Million Dollar Property, A Must to See

At least the seller thinks this is a million dollar property.  Maybe it was, in 2006.

19381 W Grant Line Rd, Tracy, CA 95391


SQ. FT.: 3,165
$/SQ. FT.: $379
LOT SIZE: 1.63 Acres
TYPE: Detached
STYLE: Contemporary
COUNTY: San Joaquin
MLS#: 40506238
STATUS: Active
ON REDFIN: 166 days

Gorgeous custom home with country feel surrounded by 1.6+ acres. Completely updated with Brazilian Cherry wood flooring throughout, crown moulding, custom paint, solid granite in kitchen, all new appliances, stunning cabinets throughout, custom entertainment center in family room. A must to see. .. .

imageIt definitely is a must to see, because the nine pictures above are all you get on the virtual tour, too.  But the virtual tour has the added benefit of loud music appropriate to a seven-digit asking price for a home over an hour’s drive from the Googleplex. 

Speaking of commutes and sitting in traffic, let’s talk about its location, location, location?  Look at this!


Ahh, country life!

Don’t believe that “166 days” on Redfin figure above, either.  This house has been listed since March.  March, 2010.  The listing was canceled in January and they listed it anew.  And if you ever had any concern about how good those Zestimates are, you can put those silly little worries to rest.  Zillow says it’s worth every penny, see?  Okay, 5 out of 6 pennies!


Rent Zestimate: $2,250 a month!  That’s a rent ratio of 44!  Hope that Brazilian Cherrywood was worth it.

Comments (15) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:09 am

May 11, 2011

Lots of Instant Equity, or Instant Submarining, in Pleasanton

Thanks very much to Burbed reader Shocked East Coaster for today’s find, which, alas, doesn’t have any marble columns.  It does have some other interesting features, like digits.  Lots and lots of digits.

1630 Laguna Hills Ln, Pleasanton, CA  94566


Bedrooms: 6
Bathrooms: 4
Sqft: 4,000
Lot size: 12,444 sq ft / 0.29 acres
Property type: Single Family
Year built: 2003
Parking type: —
Cooling system: —
Heating system: —
Fireplace: —
Days on Zillow: 7
MLS number: 40513130
Listing website: Keller Williams – Pl…

An Absolute Masterpiece with Upgrades Galore! This Exquisite Single-Story Residence Offers: 4 bedrooms plus office and 4 full baths, 3 car garage.Exceptional architectural design and quality craftsmanship is evident throughout this 4000 sq ft Former Model. Must see!

Well, no wonder Burbed’s newest contributor calls him/her/itself Shocked East Coaster.  And at these prices, I’m not surprised!  Here’s what SEC has to say about this listing:

a super affordable $828,477/month

Must be something in the water

By the way, love your site. I am new to the bay area real estate craziness( market) and I truly can’t believe the prices out here.

imageWell, if you use Zillow instead of Redfin, I guess that’s what happens.  The latter site also has 9 photos instead of just 1, and the sky is much much much more dramatic.

They didn’t magic up any marble columns, though, just this sky that matches Princess Eugenie’s hat.

Comments (36) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:15 am

April 18, 2011

Best. House. Ever.

Here’s a find from Burbed reader, now promoted to Burbed Guest Editor, sonarrat.  However, sonarrat asked me to handle this one because of a particular feature set, and no, it is not the little gold star this house somehow has earned from Redfin.

107 S 19TH St, San Jose, CA 95116


SQ. FT.: 4,400
$/SQ. FT.: $261
LOT SIZE: 10,500 Sq. Ft.
PROPERTY TYPE: Detached Single Family
STYLE: Contemporary
VIEW: Mountains, Neighborhood
COMMUNITY: Central San Jose
COUNTY: Santa Clara
MLS#: 81111392
STATUS: Active
ON REDFIN: 30 days

Grand home, perfect for large family nearby Naglee Park Area of San Jose * 8bed/6bath with a office * 2 gourmet kitchens * 2master suites * guest quarter with 2bed/1bath/livingroom/walking closet * Marble floors * 3car garage * Huge parking lot for many cars, RV and boat * 12years young * remodeled through out the house 2years ago, just like new * Easy access to majors freeways, parks, and SJSU.

107_S_19th_St_SJ_frontWhat makes a home grand?  Is it a 4400 square foot house in the middle of a bunch of hundred year old scrapers?  Is it having twice as many bedrooms or baths as a typical family needs, or even wants?  How about twice the kitchen or twice the master suites?

No, while these things may make the house ostentatiously oversized, only one feature allows a house to call itself grand, and I’m sure you remember what it is.

imageDat’s right!  Mawbul kawlums!  But this house goes one better than that.  Not only is it a stucco box that found room for six a dem dings, it has marble floors, too!

This has got to be the first time I’ve seen a house with marble columns manage to look like a 1960s cracker box.
imageBut hey, it’s got a huge parking lot for many cars, because the 3 car garage is obviously not enough.  (Wow, did the builder run out of money and not bother matching the garage doors?  Or is this some political commentary saying the Right has its eyes closed?)

I’m glad they included this shot of the parking lot, or I would have suspected they just paved the entire quarter acre lot to save money on pesky greenscaping.


Definitely what happened.  Can’t say there isn’t anything green out here.

Picnic table: definitely green.

So.  Let’s move on.  You can check out the two full kitchens yourself, I assure you they have the obligatory stainless and granite.  Instead, how about this listing history?


Yes!  Marble columns, flip,  AND foreclosure!  Isn’t that grand?  Let’s check with Zillow on those missing listing prices.image

“Any time I roll anything out, my plan is the best one in the room and people are starting to realize that.Their plan is s**t and my plan is gold. Walk into my plan and you’re going to win, win, win.”

Comments (14) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:12 am

April 15, 2011

As seen on Flip This House: Outstanding Remoldel

Thanks to Burbed reader Sam for this “very unique” find in San Carlos.

790 BUCKLAND Ave, San Carlos, CA 94070


SQ. FT.: 1,965
$/SQ. FT.: $534
LOT SIZE: 7,565 Sq. Ft.
PROPERTY TYPE: Detached Single Family
STYLE: Contemporary
STORIES: Bi/Split Level
VIEW: Bay, Neighborhood
COUNTY: San Mateo
MLS#: 81113908
STATUS: Pending Without Release
ON REDFIN: 14 days

Wow!!This is a Tremendous 4bed 3 bath home. Unmatched features and wide open floor plan make this home “fit for a King” Heated bathroom floors, heated towel racks, remote control digitally controlled shower. Electrolox Icon Stanliess steele appliances with build in espresso machine makes this kitchen one of a kind. All new windows, floors, doors, Outstanding remoldel.

imageHere’s what Sam had to say about this listing:

I guess the listing agent forgot that in 2011 the “recently flipped” moniker isn’t a feature. Flip This House is sooooo 2006. But hey, it’s “fit for a King”: it has heated towel racks! It also has “Stanliess steele”. I don’t know what that is, but I’m pretty sure it would make a good porn star name.

Well, we got good news and bad news for you, Sam.  The bad news is this listing recently changed, maybe when the buyers accepted that pending without release offer.  Maybe they took away that “recently flipped” comment you mention that I didn’t find, what with my keeping your email sitting around for 2 weeks.  But the good news is that we don’t have to scratch our heads wondering what’s wrong with this place.  Redfin’s doing the heavy lifting for us!


Very unique!  I love very unique!  Nonconforming and weird is good too!  We’re going to love working with our Redfin overlords.  Meanwhile, check out the Google Streetview of this place!  I guess Spring Bounce means equity is rising. Something is rising, because the place doesn’t look exactly level.


But wait, there’s more!  Look at the listing history, OMFG!  This must be what Sam mean about recently flipped.  Plus a bonus foreclosure, this place has it all.


Don’t worry, Zillow’s got us covered on those missing listing prices.  Hoo-boy, can you say “Price Reduction”?



Cheer up!  The house was pending back in September, 2010, and that deal fell through.  It could happen again and YOU could be the next owner!

Whoever does buy it, please replace that rug with something that doesn’t look like the hardwood floor cut open and rotated 90 degrees.  Even Stanliess steele would look better.  But nothing beats a remote control digitally controlled shower.

Comments (11) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:05 am

January 31, 2011

Great starter home–ready for move in or remodel in Palo Alto

Beds: 3
Baths: 1
Sq. Ft.: 905
$/Sq. Ft.: $1,133
Lot Size: 6,875 Sq. Ft.
Property Type: Detached Single Family
Style: Traditional
Stories: 1
Year Built: 1950
Community: Barron Park
County: Santa Clara
MLS#: 81049730
Source: MLSListings
Status: ActiveThis listing is for sale and the sellers are accepting offers.
On Redfin: 89 days
Looking for a great starter home, move in ready, remodel or maybe build your dream home in the Barron Park neighborhood, this is the property for you. Quiet area close to schools, Parks and shopping. Perfect investment opportunity for the savvy investor/builder.

Every everyone! Check out this fantastic deal! Just $1,133 per square for for you to tear down, or move into. It’s amazing how things can be both perfect opportunities for investors/builders and be move in ready. But this is the kind of innovative and agile spirit that we have in the Real Bay Area.

So let’s see… buy it… tear it down… build a 2000 sqft home on it… hey, that’s not too bad at all! Just $1.625M all in! Sweet what a deal!

Better buy soon. This is the year Real Bay Area prices roar back. I’m calling it now – $2000 per square foot in Palo Alto by this time next year!

Comments (35) -- Posted by: burbed @ 5:42 am