Let’s continue looking at some homes untouched by Bay Area Bubble 4.0 fever!  Thanks very much to Burbed reader dollarbin for this fantastic find: over 200 days on the market and wait until you see the price history! Amazing!

1915 83RD Ave
Oakland, CA 94621
$189,000

3 Beds
2 Baths
1,526 Sq. Ft.
$124 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1963
Lot Size: 5,400 Sq. Ft.
On Redfin: 210 days
Type: Detached
Stories: 1
County: Alameda
Style: Custom
Community: East Oakland
MLS#: 40592548

Come and see this custom built Eichler in Oakland. You will own the house that everyone talks about. This house is an architectural masterpiece and the additional master bed and bath make it incredible. This is the only Eichler in this part of Oakland. Open House April 6th, 10 AM- 12PM.

Here’s what dollarbin thought of the place:

I’ve been sitting on this one for quite some time and it’s finally pending but as a short sale, I bet it will have a long luxurious escrow.  Check out the listing price history, more ups and downs than a whack-a-mole game. Bring on the Eichler lovers!

There’s so much to salute about this property, it’s hard to figure out where to start the rollout.  How about we take a look at all the attractive price points it has offered in search of the One True Buyer.

No wonder it’s selling shortly!  Don’t miss the Open House, either! Um, whoops.  Hey, this is the only Eichler in this part of Oakland!

Today’s featured Villa is brought to you by the letter V. Yes, the danged Blogging from A to Z Challenge has not been Vanquished yet.  Verily, we have a Vague suspicion that some are Vexed that we’re skipping over the Rodney Dangerfield of the Bay Area, Vallejo. We feel Vallejo’s been Vanquished and another Village needs the Vital exposure this site gives to Bay Area real estate.

Translation: Vacaville, on Burbed for the Very first time, show us your Virtues!  We could mention the Very name means, literally, “cow town.” At least Vallejo was named after a Victorious general.

200 Brown St
Vacaville, CA 95688
$114,900

2 Beds
1 Baths
904 Sq. Ft.
$127 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1950
Lot Size: 6,098 Sq. Ft.
On Redfin: 33 days
Property Type: Residential, Detached, Single Family
Stories: 1
County: Solano

This fixer has a good size lot and tremendous potential close to public transportation schools great freeway access.

This listing copy has a good start and tremendous potential close to acceptable noun plural noun adjective concept whoops run on sentence.

We can smell the potential from here.

Ah, a saluting toilet! We’ve missed these.  Maybe more agents read Burbed than we thought, as open toilets are getting more difficult to find in listing photos.  And that’s a Good Thing.

Sunny yellow kitchen and space to dine.

Also this house was foreclosed on in February.  February, 2013. And that’s Vexing, as foreclosures and NODs and other housing fail are down substantially Virtually everywhere. 

Who’s priced out forever, and getting more priced out by the minute in Bay Area Bubble 4.0?  Not you! Not when you check out this completely affordable home in Oakmmphf CLOSE TO SAN FRANCISCO. Heck, you could pick up this sweet little lodging on your way home from the grocery store.  Well, you could if there were a grocery store anywhere near it.

Undisclosed Address
Oakland, CA 94621
$133,000

2 Beds
1 Baths
997 Sq. Ft.
$133 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1905
Lot Size: 3,200 Sq. Ft.
On Redfin: 4 days
Type: Detached
Stories: 1
County: Alameda
Style: Victorian
Community: E Oakland
MLS#: 40607349

Great 3 bedroom / 1 bath home with Tall ceilings! (Public records 2bd/1ba buyer to verify all property information) Spacious family room. Large eat-in kitchen w/ tile flooring. Spacious bath with tiled flooring. Homepath and Homeapth Renovation Approved!

Again with the undisclosed addresses?  Burbed laughs at the idea and discloses them.  We know how to use… teh Google!

2070 85TH AVE
OAKLAND, CA 94621
$133,000

Single Res | 2 beds | 1 baths | 997 sq. ft. | 3200 acres | 17 days on market | MLS# 40607349
Active
Price : $133,000
Bathrooms : 1
List Date : 03/04/2013
Approx Square Feet : 997
Listed Days Back : 17
Price per sq. ft : $133
County : Alameda
Approx Lot Feet : 3200
Location : 2070 85TH AVE, OAKLAND, CA 94621
Approx Lot Acres : 0.073
MLS# : 40607349
Approx age : 108
Status : New-REO
Homeowner`s Association Fee : -1 / n/a

Anyone know the difference between Homepath and Homeapth Renovation? Don’t ask Redfin. This is below their minimum commission.

Today’s featured property is brought to you by Burbed reader wahnny.  It’s perfect for a quick little mini-vacay, because it’s an easy drive from Google, Facebook, Apple, or wherever you should be working this weekend.  Just plop down the cash (easily found behind the couch cushions or by redeeming a couple of stock options), pitch your tent, and enjoy!  Plus, you could build a house on it!

2155 Tucker
Scotts Valley, CA 95066
$140,000

— Beds
— Baths
— Sq. Ft.
Built: —
Lot Size: 4.74 Acres
On Redfin: 9 days
Property Type: Residential Land (Single Family)
Community: Scotts Valley North
MLS#: 81304038
View: Mountains
County: Santa Cruz

Perfect vacation spot with a self sufficient little cabin. Off the grid with spring fed water. A wonderful tree house, a zip line, a foot bridge PLUS your own beach on Soquel Creek (year round water) Great place to get away, enjoy the peace and quiet. Read a book, go for a hike, let you kids enjoy the the outdoors! Can’t see a neighbor who you all share in the road maintenance.

Here’s why wahnny sent in this delightful home away from home (that is, if by home, we actually meant a place that doesn’t have a house for grown-ups on site).

Just came across this offbeat/offgrid Scotts Valley getaway.  What an interesting use of children, to help sell property.  And deep in the woods no less!

Unlike the "mini-San Simeon" property, this one actually has a zip line, as well as other fun structures (cabin, treehouse), and isn’t as far from civilization/paved roads.  And it has "beach" access (to the creek) too!

Given its relative proximity to the RBA, relative RBA pricing, and r3ltrd copyspeak, it’s quite clear who this would appeal to!

Every rule we’ve ever heard about staging a property for sale says to take family photos out of the house, because the buyers want to visualize themselves in the house. If they see pictures of your family, then that makes it harder for them to see themselves living there.  Obviously either the agent never heard of this rule, or she has some really obstinate sellers.  Why?  This property features a bunch of family snaps instead of the usual listing photos.

And whoever’s idea this was, they really want you to admire the family.  The pictures of the grounds that left the wife and kiddies out are not the sharpest prints in the drawer. 

Just wait until you meet “can’t see a neighbor who you all share in the road maintenance.”  We double dog dare you to share in the road maintenance with someone you can’t see.

Bunus: Be sure to check out the listing history.

Extra-super-bunus: Last sale (at $190K in 2007) and the older photos are still available for your viewing pleasure.  You can tell this one on the right is from the old set, because it’s actually focused.

It’s time for another expedition a little further from the usual Google-Facebook-Twitter locations, locations, locations.  Today’s featured frontage is a full-on flip, thanks to Burbed reader dollarbin!

203 SUNNYHILLS Dr
Watsonville, CA 95076
$319,000

3 Beds 
2 Baths 
1,380 Sq. Ft.
$231 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1954 
Lot Size: 5,227 Sq. Ft. 
On Redfin: 21 days
Status: Pending With Release
Property Type: Detached Single Family
Stories: 1
Community: Watsonville
MLS#: 81241943
Style: Contemporary
View: Neighborhood
County: Santa Cruz

Freshly Remodeled 3 bedroom 2 bath Eichler home at the end of a cul de sac. Short walking distance to schools in nice stable neighborhood. new roof, all new plumbing, upgraded electrical service, wiring and light fixtures, new heater, and water heater upgraded kitchen with granite counter tops and stainless appliances. all double paned windows

Granite and stainless and panes, oh my!  And dollarbin has another reason to send in this listing.  Let’s listen in.

I was checking out the listing for this Watsonville flat-top.  Looking at the listing I noticed that it sold back in April for roughly half the price.  Fortunately, the old listing also has interior photos.

Shame they had to paint over all of that original artwork.

Wait, old listing?

203 SUNNYHILLS Dr
Watsonville, CA 95076
Sold for $160,000

2 Beds 
1 Baths  1,470 Sq. Ft.
$109 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1954 
Lot Size: 5,227 Sq. Ft. 
Sold On: Apr 26, 2012
Status: Sold
Property Type: Detached Single Family
Stories: 1
Community: Watsonville
MLS#: 81200844
Style: Cottage/Bungalow
View: Neighborhood
County: Santa Cruz

Subject located on corner lot at end of road. Large backyard patio area. Centrally located near all amenities. Interior of home is vandalized and will require much TLC. Good opportunity for a contractor/investor fixer.

Let’s enjoy that original artwork, then.

And best of all, these pictures are actual size.  So for once you don’t have to go to the listing to embiggen them.

But the photo of the living room above is the only picture that we can tell for sure was taken in the same house.  See if you can identify some of the others!

And note the good wishes the artist left for the future homeowners.  It’s in red so you can’t miss it.  SUCCESS.

Today’s feature caught our eye on a political site’s discussion area that doesn’t usually get into real estate. The topic was those disadvantaged $250K a year families who are going to get dinged with new taxes, which is so unfair!  These put-upon engines of economic advancement are hardly making it!  Why after spending all their take-home pay on a high-priced mortage or rent payments, private school or college tuition for the kiddies, sky-high taxes, fully funding their retirement plans, restaurants, gifts, vacations, clothing, cable (of course including HBO and Showtime), utilities, cleaning services (housekeeper and pool) 16 cell phone lines, internet, car payments for the new BMW, the current Mercedes and the old (2011) Audi, why before you know it these unfortunate folks in the top 5% are barely clearing anything!

Fortunately, one of the respondents noted that living in San Francisco really did not have to cost so much.  We thank our political participants for pointing us to this house.

1055 Gilman Avenue
San Francisco CA 94124
Price:  $200,000

Bedrooms: 2 
Bathrooms: 1
63 days on Trulia
3,442 views
Property type: Single-Family Home
Size: 950 sqft
Lot: Ask agent
Price/sqft: $211/sqft
Year built: 1908
MLS/ID: 401812
Neighborhood: Bayview, 94124

Opportunity In Bayview! Close To Gilman Rec, Brete Harte Elementary And Steps To Candlestick Park. Some Interior Walls And Flooring Have Been Removed. Buyer To Investigate To Their Satisfaction. Property Is Not Being Shown At This Time, Please Check Back After October 29Th.

While the property is still Not Being Shown At This Time, seeing is believing!

This home has potential all over, especially In The Electrical Wiring.  You’ll have no trouble confirming this, what with Some Interior Walls and Flooring helpfully Removed.

We’re continuing the DEALS DEALS DEALS with yet another region full of cheap housing. Today’s victim: Santa Cruz County!  But wait, you may rudely point out. Santa Cruz County is not part of the Bay Area.  It does not have any part of it touching the Bay.

Oh yeah?  What’s Monterey Bay, chopped liver?  Plenty of people commute to Silicon Valley from Santa Cruz County.  Maybe even Googlers.  Presenting, the cheapest house in all of Santa Cruz County!

575 HAZEL BRAKE
San Lorenzo Valley, CA 95006
$115,000

2 Beds 
1 Baths 
900 Sq. Ft.
$128 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1943 
Lot Size: 0.45 Acres 
On Redfin: 1 day
Status: Active
Property Type
Detached Single Family
Stories: 1
Community: Boulder Creek
MLS#: 81241767
Style: Cabin
View: Neighborhood
County: Santa Cruz

DO NOT visit property with out an Agent; stairway, deck and house could be dangerous. This is a major fixer-upper, however it is in a great neighborhood. Bracken Brae has hiking trails, picnic grounds, private water system and roads with lovely river access just for owners.

When a property listing starts out with a warning like DO NOT visit property, we know it’s going to be good. And unlike the places we found earlier this week, this one has more than 2500 square feet of land.  It also has more than one picture, which means more work for us. 

At left is Picture number two.  Out of 24. Believe us when we say this is one of the cheerier views.

Also, catch the not-so-subtle reminder that rentards aren’t deserving of anything: lovely river access just for owners.  This is like Foothills Park, except living in Palo Alto is nowhere as exciting. For this dangerous listing, DO NOT go anywhere (especially stairway, deck and house) with out an Agent. DO NOT even look at these photos.

This agent deserves some kind of award, for either Whole Truth In Real Estate Photography, or for skipping the worse views that weren’t included.

Happy Monday!  We’ve got another exciting story for you, about some riveting residents who really respect realtards.  Read on!

Squatters issue restraining order against real estate agent

KTVU Channel 2,
Posted: 9:49 p.m. Friday, April 20, 2012

ANTIOCH, Calif. —  A Bay Area real estate agent said she’s being taken to court by squatters in Antioch who have taken over a house she’s trying to sell.

As many as three people have been living in the Concord home since December. Even though the owner never gave them permission to move in, they’re apparently not moving out without a fight.

Real estate agent Melissa Case said she can’t get too close to the four-bedroom, two-and-a-half bathroom home she’s listed for sale in Antioch because the unauthorized residents took her to court.

“I have a temporary restraining order against me right now,” Case said. “I cannot come within 50 yards of the home, which was filed by the squatters.”

Case is definitely a Real Estate Professional.  You can tell from the way she talks, because it reads just like listing copy we see every day here.  The home was filed by the squatters,  Got it.  So you’re going to love this next quote from Ms. Case:

“Actually the police came out and verified that their… rental agreement? [air quotes]… was false and full of misspellings.”

Because nothing says Real Estate Professional like an example of their work product written up full of misspellings.

Here’s the house, and it was not easy to find.  Case described it as a “four bedroom two and a half bath” but Redfin listed it as a 4/3.  Also just to really mess with our minds, the article also said it was in Concord (see the second paragraph above).  Do you have any idea how many freaking short sales there are in Antioch? Or Concord?  Let’s just say I have a feeling we’re not in Los Altos anymore.

5116 THISTLEWOOD Ct
Antioch, CA 94531
$149,000

BEDS: 4
BATHS: 3
SQ. FT.: 1,873
$/SQ. FT.: $80
LOT SIZE: 5,900 Sq. Ft.
TYPE: Detached
STYLE: Traditional
STORIES: 2
YEAR BUILT: 1991
COMMUNITY: Antioch
COUNTY: Contra Costa
MLS#: 40568008
SOURCE: EBRD
STATUS: Pending
ON REDFIN: 23 days

End of Court Location and Across the street from the neighborhood park!! This home needs TLC.

End of Court!  Get it?  Get it?  Because the agent got taken to court!  Ahahahahahaha!

And speaking of short sales, the “homeowner in Berkeley” picked up this winner of a house for $460,000.  In 2004.  The current asking price is 23% less than what the house sold for, new, in 1992.  Perhaps “needs TLC” means “Teardown, Level and Condemn.”

This site does not get out to the East Bay enough.  Thanks very much to Burbed reader Jeremy from Hayward for doing the legwork for us, with this vintage villa in Castro Valley.  Remember, if you want us to cover more hella-fine houses from your hometown, be sure to send some in!

Today’s house is one you may be able to pick up with your income tax refund.  Now who says there isn’t affordable housing in the Bay Area?

5939 E Castro Valley Blvd
Castro Valley, CA 94552
$199,900

BEDS: 3
BATHS: 1
SQ. FT.: 1,390
$/SQ. FT.: $144
LOT SIZE: 1.74 Acres
TYPE: Detached
STYLE: Contemporary
STORIES: 2
YEAR BUILT: 1900
COMMUNITY: Castro Valley
COUNTY: Alameda
MLS#: 40567572
SOURCE: EBRD
STATUS: Active
ON REDFIN: 16 days

Bank Owned !!! CONTRACTOR Special !!! Home needs Extensive repairs or may need to be torn down. LOT’s of POTENTIAL for this 1.75 acre lot.

Here’s why Jeremy sent us this classic structure:

All I can say is Best. Addition. Ever!!!

No Kitchen? Need extra space? No problem! In the East Bay we just knock out a wall and drive our RV up next to the house, some duct tape, and viola! Mama’s new kitchen!

Oi….at least it’s not $1million!

This has got to be a whole new level of WTFness, even if it didn’t have that lovely support post right next to the RV entrance.

Here’s another view of the RV.

Hoe.  Leigh.  Crap.

Jeremy followed up with:

Do you get a break on a combined auto/home policy for this?

Do you pay property tax or car registration?

It is pretty spectacular. Loving the retro dwell-ready colors on the RV as well….

Be sure to head over to the listing, because there are plenty more photos, although most are of the house without an RV parked in the middle of it.

Lot’s of POTENTIAL, indeed.  Too bad the listing doesn’t specify if the RV stays.

Bunus: Location, location, location!

Thanks very much to Burbed reader Petsmart Groomer for finding one of those listings that seems like such a steal, you’ll be grabbing onto your wallet and wondering what the catch is.  Why, the catch is this consummate condo!  Why don’t you grab it before it gets away?

690 Market St #303
San Francisco, CA 94104
$105,000

BEDS: 1
BATHS: 1.5
SQ. FT.: 1,275
$/SQ. FT.: $82
LOT SIZE: -
PROPERTY TYPE: Luxury, Tenancy In Common
STYLE: Contemporary, Modern/High Tech
VIEW: City Lights, San Francisco, Downtown
YEAR BUILT: 2007
COMMUNITY: Financial District
COUNTY: San Francisco
MLS#: 393305
SOURCE: San Francisco MLS
STATUS: Active
ON REDFIN: 47 days

Live without limits in one of the world’s most romantic cities. Located in the celebrated Chronicle Building, The Ritz-Carlton Club San Francisco offers one, two and three-bedroom fractional ownership residences coupled with casually elegant service and amenities including valet parking, personal concierge, private fitness and member storage, daily housekeeping, residents’ lounge and more. This luxurious residence is 1,275 square feet with one bedroom and one and one-half bathrooms. Fine finishings such as a fully equipped chef’s kitchen, complete entertainment center, Italian marble bathrooms and wine storage come standard. The Ritz-Carlton Club San Francisco enjoys a pristine location in Union Square and is one hour from Napa Valley.

Whatever could possibly go wrong here?  Sure, Market Street is busy 24 hours a day and this unit is on the third floor, but the City sounds (as well as the smells) are what you’re signing up for when you buy a place in Baghdad by the Bay, right?  And the $1,398 monthly homeowner fees might come as a surprise after you slapped down the purchase price in cash, expecting to move in and only pay a pittance in property taxes.

But note that phrase “fractional ownership residences.”  That means this isn’t your condo.  Or rather, it isn’t just your condo.  You’ll be sharing it with some other people, and the listing doesn’t bother specifying how many.  For all you know, you get to use this condo from 4 to 6 am on alternate Thursdays in months without an R during Leap Years.

And it gets even better.  This yours-some-of-the-time pied-a-terre, located close to Nordstrom and lots of homeless people, is bank-owned!

But the good news is the whatever-it-is-they’re-selling comes with a parking space, so you ought to overbid twice asking.  Have you ever tried parking around here?

Here’s unit #301 in the same building, with an asking price half of this one, for three weeks a year.  It’s been sitting all by its lonesome for almost a year (maybe the three weeks are already up).  However, #301 is in an alternate 690 Market Street, which only has 49 units in the building, while #303 has 101 units.  Good thing this 690 Market will give you so many more fractional neighbors!

Can anyone find out how much you get to “use” #303, as opposed to merely “owning” it?  Can anyone figure out how many laws of physics were violated by these two condos (with the same photos) appearing on the same website?