That’s right, who doesn’t love a pink house?  Especially a pink house in San Jose!  How about East San Jose, because that’s what Burbed reader Tracy Tea House has found for us.  And once more, you are TOO LATE.  Seriously, would you get off your butt and buy another house? Do you want to be PRICED OUT FOREVER in Bubble 4.0?

50 PICKFORD Ave
San Jose, CA 95127
Listed for $324,950
Sold for $391,000 on 11/28/2012

3 Beds
2 Baths
1,381 Sq. Ft.
$283 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1930
Lot Size: 10,000 Sq. Ft.
Sold On: Nov 28, 2012
Status: Sold
Property Type: Detached Single Family
Stories: 1
County: Santa Clara
Style: Craftsman
Community: Alum Rock
MLS#: 81239001

BANK OWNED REO! Excellent opportunity to own a home with lots of upside potential. Property has two garages, both have had permits pulled but never finaled. Property needs lots of work and is to be sold in its present “AS IS” condition. Home is in fairly good condition inside but you will need to replace some doors and windows. Some kitchen appliances are missing.

Opportunity! Potential! Fairly good condition! Unfinaled permits! Bank Owned REO! (What other kinds of REO are there?) What are you waiting for, don’t walk, don’t run, rent a helicopter and FLY over there right now!  Let’s listen in on Tracy’s nomination speech:

Pink and dismal. So much more than “some of the appliances are missing.” How about the sheet rock? Stinking Pink, tiny halls, open toilets, this bank owned house has it all.

Is this the “RBA?” I like the three pictures of the street in the wild west of East San José.

Wild West is right, they even show the broken windows.  We don’t know where Tracy got the above shot because it’s not on Redfin, and ZipRealty wanted us to sign in (As If, ZipR!)

Enjoy the pictures.  We included a bunch, because we never know when some real estate site will make us sign in.  The street, the open toilet, and many more right after the break.

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If you haven’t already gotten up at 5 a.m. to start shopping for holiday bargains, you’ve still come to the right place!  Thanksgiving is over, so get on your steel-toed cyber boots, the better to kick your fellow shoppers out of your way!  Yes, it’s time for Burbed‘s Black Friday Sales, where we find the absolute rock-bottom in housing prices all around the Bay!  And we’re opening an hour early just for you!

Here’s how Black Friday Sales will work this year. We’ll again feature the cheapest properties in each county all around the Bay Area, plus some of our favorite cities.  But we won’t forget that our readers are sending in listings as well, so you just never know if each day will be a Sale Property or something else entirely.  You’ll just have to tune in every day to find out.

Let’s begin our sales in Silicon Valley, because even Googlers like to bargain-hunt.  Here we go, the absolutely cheapest house in all of Santa Clara County!  Ready?

8282 Murray Ave #97
Gilroy, CA 95020
$18,000

1 Beds 
1 Baths 
542 Sq. Ft.
$33 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1966 
Lot Size: — 
On Redfin: 38 days
Status: Active
Property Type: Mobile Home (Single Wide), Mobile Home (Expando)
County: Santa Clara
Community: Morgan Hill/Gilroy/San Martin
MLS#: 81237950

Pre-owned, 1966 Kit, 1 bedroom/ 1 bath Single-wide mobile home in a senior park (one owner must be at least 55 years of age). Includes refrigerator, washer & dryer and window air conditioner. Low space rent!

Oh, not what you had in mind?  Even with a low space rent of $560 (which will probably double as soon as you finish signing those papers at the title company)?  Even with 15 pictures?

If you insist, there’s this.

5591 CARRYBACK Ave
San Jose, CA 95111
$245,000

2 Beds
2 Baths
1,121 Sq. Ft.
$219 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1989
Lot Size: 2,184 Sq. Ft.
On Redfin: 265 days
Status: Active
Property Type: Attached Single Family
Community South San Jose
MLS# 81208122
Stories: 2
County Santa Clara

Good home conveniently located. This is a short sale. Please do not disturb occupants.

Whatever developer named this street sure has a twisted sense of humor, because it’s a short sale.  There ought to be a Piggyback Lane here too.  Be sure to check out the listing history, because this place has gone pending four different times in the last three years, plus it sold in 2000, yes, twelve years ago, for $247K.

What? You want a detached house?  Okay, but this is your very last chance.

2138 HURAN Dr
San Jose, CA 95122
$248,000

3 Beds
1 Baths
912 Sq. Ft.
$272 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1960
Lot Size: 5,150 Sq. Ft.
On Redfin: 16 days
Status: Active
Property Type: Detached Single Family
View: Neighborhood
County Santa Clara
Stories: 1
Community Alum Rock
MLS# 81240311

Another opportunity to own this 3 bedroom 1 bathroom single Family home located in San Jose. Very close to shopping centers, mall, and schools. Easy access to freeway 101. Sell is an “AS IS “ condition. Some dual Pane windows. Garage converted but permits unknown.

Oh, we’ve got a winner here! This one has everything! It’s also selling shortly, plus questionable permits and for sale as-is.  The listing copy mentioned the “easy access” to 101, but they didn’t mention the just as easy access to Reid-Hillview Airport. Hope you like the sound of takeoffs and landings!

And remember, more Black Friday Sales to come!

Listings tend to fall into certain kinds of categories here at Burbed.  There’s your all around crapshack, usually sold for the land value and no pictures inside.  There’s your overbuilt flip that’s wrong for the neighborhood.  There’s your overbuilt “dream home” that’s wrong for any neighborhood, and its cousin, the nightmare home whose builder ran out of money. Burbed reader Tracy Tea House has found us something else entirely over in East San Jose: winner of the wtf tag.

1764 Mount Kenya Dr
San Jose, CA 95127
Not for Sale

Zestimate $434,672
Rent Zestimate $2,549/mo
Est. Mortgage $1,507/mo

Beds: 5
Baths: 2
Sqft: 1,884
Lot: 5,662 sq ft / 0.13 acres
Type: Single Family
Year built: 1961
Construction quality: 6.0
County: Santa Clara
Last remodel year: 1961
Legal description: TRACT 2450 MT PLEASANT BOOK 132 PAGE1 7 LOT 792
Lot depth: 105
Lot width: 54
Parcel #: 64724054
Per floor sqft: 1,884
Total rooms: 7
# Stories: 2.0
Structure type: Other
Unit cnt: 1
Zillow Home ID: 19786732

Split level home with so much potential. Three bedrooms upstairs and two downstairs. Open floor plan with large living room. Inside laundry. Downstairs bedrooms may be locked but rest of the house is view-able. Large separate storage room outside, detached workshop. Some double-pane windows. Home needs front and back landscaping, has nice decorative stone wall. Good handyman special.

We’re not going to let a little thing like the house not being for sale stop us.  Besides, Movoto’s got it for $350,000.

Here’s what Tracy had to say when sending in this Alum Rock redoubt:

Do not drink before viewing these pictures!

Oh wow. Wrong in so many ways, but the picture of the kitchen is a first for me! This house just hit the market for 350K

What, you’ve never seen green cabinets before?  Oh, you mean this one.

We don’t think we’ve ever seen one of those in a kitchen before either.  Guess putting it outside isn’t that good an idea.

Bunus: Check out the (five years) old listing photos currently on Redfin.

It’s Halloween!  We’d love to hear what you’re dressed up as today, and what your kids are wearing to their Real Bay Area schools!  But first, the trick. 

Burbed reader Tracy Tea House is serving this San Jose special today, and we’ll leave it for you to unwrap.  Remember, Tracy likes Trulia for listings, so you can too.

1747 Vollmer Way
San Jose CA 95116
$429,900

Reduced $20,000 on 10/12/12
Est. payment: 
Bedrooms: 4 
Bathrooms: 2 full, 2 partial 
29 days on Trulia
171 views
Property type: Single-Family Home
Size: 1,658 sqft
Lot: Ask agent
Price/sqft: $259/sqft
Year built: 1947
MLS/ID: 81236242
Neighborhood: Alum Rock, 95116

San Jose, CA – Single Family Detached
Description provided by Trulia
This Single-Family Home located at 1747 Vollmer Way, San Jose CA is currently for sale and has been listed on Trulia for 29 days. This property is listed by CENTURY 21 Alpha for $429,900. 1747 Vollmer Way has 4 beds, 4 baths, and approximately 1,658 square feet. The price per square foot is $259. The property was built in 1947. 1747 Vollmer Way is in the Alum Rock neighborhood in San Jose, CA.

Here’s what you get when you ring this doorbell:

Lord Voldemort’s street… This one scares me and the listing croppy is just that, strange and mystifying. Seems like, from the satellite,  there is some kind of evil carnival located on the street behind.

Listing copy?  We see no listing copy here.    Redfin says, menacingly, “There are no remarks available.”  Maybe Lord Voldemort… disposed of it… along with the lot size the agent won’t disclose online. Hint: 6477 sf per Redfin. They also have three completely different photos, including this kitchen as classic “before” snap, and a yard perfect for burying mistakes.

Now here’s a treat: pictures inside the house from three years ago.  Plus an even older listing (nine years! for $388K! with overbidding!), no photos but actual description:

MOTIVATED SELLERS HAVE ALREADY FOUND REPLACEMENT HOME AND READY TO MAKE A DEAL NEW ROOF HAS BEEN DONE WITH GUTTERS * * * TILE KITCHEN, FRENCH DOORS TO BACKYARD CENTRALLY LOCATED TO FREEWAYS AND SHOPPING * * GARAGE CONV. PERMITS UNKNOWN

Like Dr. Frankenstein, we’re digging up pieces all over the place to assemble this monster.  Movoto cached the recent listing description!

Price:  $429,900
Loan Payment:  $1,497/mo
Bedrooms:  4
Bathrooms:  3
Size:  1,658 sqft
$/Sqft:  $259/sqft
Type:  Single Family House
Year Built:  1947
Lot Size:  6,477
Days on Movoto:  26 days
Neighborhood:  Alum Rock
MLS#:  81236242
Status:  Pending – Do Not Show

This is a very large home at a reasonable price. Look no further for these one`s in a life time opportunity home. Close to all convenience for your benefit.

That does sound creepy.  Have a look at the carnival and Happy Halloween!

Today’s fistful of awesome in Alum Rock is brought to you by Burbed reader Tracy Tea House. Thanks very much for this foothill find!

15865 East Alta Vista Way
San Jose – East Valley, CA 95127
$499,000

3 bedroom, 1 bathroom, 1 partial bath, 1,570 square feet, Single Family
Lot Size: 15,794 Sq. Ft.
Year Built: 1950
Days on ZipRealty: 34
Listed: 08/09/12
Price/sq ft: $318
Estimated Monthly Payment: $1,737
Neighborhood: East Foothills
School District: Alum Rock Union Elementary School District, East Side Union High School District
Source: MLSListings Inc.
MLS #: 81229860
Views: 61
Popularity: 8
Walk Score®: 9

Large yard w/deck & view of downtown SJ & Silicon Valley — marvelous! Newly improved driveway. Home is in move-in condition. Bonus room could be 3rd bedroom. Shows well. Level site on lot. Quiet residential hillside neighborhood is minutes away from shopping & parks. Not a through street — EAST Alta Vista Way has only a few (somewhat enormous) houses on it. Enjoy the view!

And here’s why Tracy chose this house out of thousands just for you!

Near a few enormous houses.  Truly poor photography. Value fail, great list copy.

What are you talking about?  This is great photography!  Do you have any idea how hard a photographer has to work to compose images like these?  Anyone can take pictures of a house, but this?  This transcends the artform by questioning its purpose.

For example, is the front of that fireplace actually carpeted?  Or is it a ginormous piece of hard candy?  Only a truly gifted photographer could make you wonder like that.

And instant equity galore!  Just check out the price history!  In no time flat the market’s going to heat up to eleven and every property price in this county will double in eleven minutes.  Yes, you read it here first.  The Real Bay Area is back, it’s booming, and it’s bettuh than evuh!

It’s been so long since we’ve featured a house like today’s property, and this site used to run almost nothing else.  Blame it on all the flippers out there trying to install granite in absolutely every building.

Today’s home hails from amazing Alum Rock, and was discovered by Burbed reader Tracy Tea House, who is our guest blogger this fine day.  We’re headed for Zillow, (Redfin link here) so hold on!  And before we go, be sure to give Tracy a big, warm Real Bay Area welcome for this guest post!

1761 E San Antonio St
San Jose, CA 95116
For Sale: $285,000

Zestimate®: $271,085
Est. Mortgage: $1,020/mo
See current rates on Zillow
Beds: 2
Baths: 1
Sqft: 937
Lot: 9,583 sq ft / 0.22 acres
Type: Single Family
Year built: 1920
Parking: –
Cooling: –
Heating: –
Fireplace: –
On Zillow: 30 days
MLS #: 81224183

Brokered And Advertised By: Altas Realty Listing Agent: Clem Garcia

There’s something about a North  East San José crap shack from 1920 that just gets my juices flowing. I start imagining the history, who lived there, what this part of California was like back then, so much closer to the time of  original settlement.

Then, I start thinking of the toxics, asbestos, old leaky containers and old buried tanks in the 9000 sf yard. Suddenly, the idea of tearing it down and building a flip doesn’t sound too bad… But, people are living there, in all  937 sf of it and they want almost 300K for it????

Still the pictures are intriguing. There is dirt, trash, chain link, Plywood fences, artful shadows, and so much more  in the mystery RV.  Then there are the “normal” houses nearby… How has this one remained all these years, and who will come on the scene to change it. Ok, I’m hooked I’ll add it to my many saved shacks, and send it to madhaus and burbed who I know will appreciate the art of this sale.

Burbed loves East San Jose, because some of the best properties can be found here.  That is, if by “best” we actually mean “Can you believe this?”  Thanks very much to Burbed reader Tracy Tea House for proving once more, that when it comes to housing, Alum Rocks!

1412 Mount Herman Drive
San Jose, CA 95127
$300,000

Status: Withdrawn
Bedrooms: 4
Bathrooms: 3
Property type: Single Family Residential
Size: 1,368 sqft
Lot: 0.12 acres
Price/sqft: $219/sqft
Year built: 1961
Added on Trulia: 180+ days ago
Neighborhood: Alum Rock
Zip: 95127

The property has been maintain by sellers. With the converted garage, you have additional living area. Lots of parking space, nice front yard, rear room converted! Brokered And Advertised By: PN Real Estate Group Listing Agent: Louis Montalvo

Here’s why Tracy thought you’d love this place:

Here is a shack that proves the point, interior pictures are unnecessary anymore. Now if you can just “maintain” yourself, all rooms are converted. Even the car  has been covered, and probably converted.

These photographs have so much artistry in them, and such a unique point of view. The detail shot of the concrete is inspiring me. As a bonus, you will not be able to leave the house by car twice a day. If you want to walk however, the school has crossing guards.

Now wait, this house is Special.  It has been maintain by sellers, something one rarely finds in buying a house from them.

Bunus: the reason this house was withdrawn is that it got foreclosed on April 2nd. 

Thanks very much to Burbed reader sonarrat for this essential elegance in East San Jose! 

1613 ORLEANS Dr
San Jose, CA 95122
$300,000

BEDS: 3
BATHS: 2
SQ. FT.: 1,283
$/SQ. FT.: $234
LOT SIZE: 5,562 Sq. Ft.
PROPERTY TYPE: Detached Single Family
STYLE: Contemporary
STORIES: 1
VIEW: Neighborhood
YEAR BUILT: 1968
COMMUNITY: Alum Rock
COUNTY: Santa Clara
MLS#: 81200318
SOURCE: MLSListings
STATUS: Active
ON REDFIN: 98 days

nothing

There simply are no other words for how awesome this listing is.  Or exactly how much this agent is willing to do to sell it.

San Jose: Crews use huge trucks to clear junk from hoarder home

By Mark Gomez, San Jose Mercury News
Posted:   03/15/2012 06:24:40 AM PDT, Updated:   03/15/2012 08:03:03 AM PDT

Crews were in their second day at a San Jose home removing mountains of debris so massive that workers used two hauling trucks, each capable of carrying 72,380 pounds of material, to get the job done.

As of Wednesday morning, they still hadn’t made their way into the backyard.

The extreme makeover at 226 S. Claremont Ave. began Tuesday after a vote last month by the Santa Clara County Board of Supervisors to declare the residence a public nuisance. The piles of junk, garbage and other items, including worn out bicycles, car tires and animal cages, had become so vast that it was visible from satellite photos.

The cleanup, which is expected to take about five days, ends a years-long struggle for neighbors who live in the otherwise well-kept neighborhood located off Alum Rock Avenue.

Thanks very much to Burbed reader Tracy Tea House, who had sent in an earlier story about the residents complaining about the massive piles of garbage at this house.  Looks like once this story hit both what’s left of a newspaper as well as on KGO-7 television news, the County finally took action.

Neighbors have been trying to have the grounds cleaned up since 2005.  Cleanup orders and fines were ignored by Richard Baker, the 58 year old son of the registered homeowners.  People fortunate enough to live near this local attraction suggested that Richard might be a few hundred square feet short of a McMansion.

Robert and Bessie Baker, Richard Baker’s parents, have both been deceased for ten years, so management of the house was transferred to the Office of the Public Guardian.  This agency will be responsible for inventorying whatever is in the house, as opposed to the mountains of garbage outside mostly headed for the landfill.  Anything of value inside or out would be saved for the Bakers’ estate, over and above this valuable residence.  In addition to Richard, the Bakers also have a daughter living in Santa Cruz who was only located recently.

Richard had been living in the house while collecting treasures, but not recently.  He did show up at the County hearing to object to the the home’s being declared a public nuisance, although the neither the Murk nor KGO-7 reported on what his reasons were.  He attempted to postpone the hearing because he had been in the hospital, but was unsuccessful. We’d guess the County’s embarrassment over things getting to this point trumped a hospital stay.  Remember all those fines Richard blew off?  Guess they did.

Okay, enough rewording the newspaper and TV articles.  Let’s have a look at this house.

Better have a good look at the driveway, too.

Wow, the Streetviews actually look worse than the satellite view.  And someone updated this record recently even though the house wasn’t for sale.

So here’s a way Richard (right) and his sister (who had the sense not to show up when cameras were rolling) could save even more money.  We know the County’s going to stick them with that clean-up bill, so every little bit is going to help!

Thanks for the advice, Trulia!  Anyway, do you have a neighbor building a fortification on the front lawn like this?  Tell us about it in today’s Weekend Open Thread!

Today’s prestigious property was sent in by Burbed reader Tracy.  You know that saying about shutting the barn door after the horses run away?  These barn doors are wide open, and the barnyard is large.  Deep, too.  Come to Peacock Canyon, and breathe in the fresh air.

UPDATE at end of article.

16235 ALUM ROCK Ave
San Jose, CA 95127
$320,000

BEDS: 3
BATHS: 2
SQ. FT.: 1,400
$/SQ. FT.: $229
LOT SIZE: 2.17 Acres
PROPERTY TYPE: Detached Single Family
STORIES: 2
VIEW: Mountains, Canyon
YEAR BUILT: 1900
COMMUNITY: Alum Rock
COUNTY: Santa Clara
MLS#: 81208053
SOURCE: MLSListings
STATUS: Active
ON REDFIN: 11 days

Historic ALum Rock Stables is ready for a new start. 12 stall horse stable as well as level lot that could be used for a home or possibly an arena. Gourgeous views of Peacock Canyon and access to the Alum Rock Regional Park make this an ideal location for the horseman or naturist.

Here’s why Tracy sent this listing in for some Burbed loving.

I have fantasized about this place, many times when it has been on the market. It looks to be located midway down a landslide, but that might just be me. The view is amazing, and the price seems right, but it is a crap shack, so qualifies for the burbed treatment.

It certainly does!  This place sold for an eye-popping $1.2 million in 2006, which means it’s worth almost two million now.  What a deal the bank is offering. 

And go over to the Redfin listing to check out the pictures, because this is another one of those homes for visually organized people where every room is painted a different very bright primary color.  Maybe the FBs were running a daycare along with the horse business.

Given how old the structures are, these are in surprising good shape!  They were built in the 19th Century, yet modernization was allowed to happen.  Look, they even installed indoor plumbing!

Now if you really want some cognitive dissonance with your morning coffee, check out Zillow’s price history:

You let those horses out of the barn, and the barn is now worth less than it was 21 years ago.  Then again, Zillow has a completely different set of pictures for the property, so that could explain the discrepancy.  Also a different address.  Maybe these are competing Alum Rock Stables properties.

Well, one address or the other is an ideal location for the horseman or naturist.  I just wonder if the Realtard who wrote this copy knows what a naturist is.

Update 12:15 pm: The Redfin link above is now bouncing to 11125 Canon Vista Ave, with 2006 information. And different pictures since that’s a previous listing. It also says that property is pending as of today.  Head over to Trulia to see the above pictures and copy, while you can.