We’ve Nosed past the first half of the Blogging from A to Z Challenge, and Now we’re on to the New ones. Let’s celebrate with the kind of property Burbed was always Noted for.  Today’s featured property in Newark Needs work.

7419 WELLS Ave
Newark, CA 94560
$299,000

2 Beds
1 Baths
660 Sq. Ft.
$453 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1895
Lot Size: 6,250 Sq. Ft.
On Redfin: 7 days
Type: Detached
Stories: 1
County: Alameda
Style: Traditional
Community: Newark
MLS#: 40609921

Remodeled 2 yrs ago. Newer copper plumbing and sewer line, newer doors, paint and laminate floors throughout, newer bathroom and most windows are newer. Garage conversion to a studio is being used as rental, Maybe illegal! No knowledge of permits. AS IS Sale only! Only showing 4/13 and 4/14 11-2pm

This is so exciting! Maybe illegal! Or immoral, or fattening. With No Notion of permits, Nothing’s impossible. So Not only is this Nice home available for Not a lot of money, it’s also Notorious!

Today is the first day of the Blogging from A to Z Challenge, so we’ll Abjure their Authorized Arms And Affirm our Abecedarian Attempt. And we Aspire to give A tip of the Aviator’s cap to Arlee Bird for Activating this Affair, with over 1700 blogs Associated!  Most All of them Aren’t in the Real Bay Area, so while we Advocate your Auditing Any and All, you Aren’t Accountable to Acquire Any properties.

We’re delighted to be part of this Amazing Alliance!  Now on to today’s Apt Acreage.

6792 ALMADEN Rd
San Jose, CA 95120
$865,000

5 Beds
3 Baths
2,704 Sq. Ft.
$320 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1969
Lot Size: 7,169 Sq. Ft.
On Redfin: 13 days
Property Type: Detached Single Family
View: Neighborhood
County": Santa Clara
Stories: 2
Community: Almaden Valley
MLS#: 81308508

Large 5 bedroom Almaden home with swimming pool, corner lot. Top Almaden Schools: Graystone, Bret Harte & Leland. Property is Lender-Owned, being sold "AS-IS, " US Bank makes no representations or warranties. US Bank financing available. All US Bank loans to be approved by US Bank. .

US Bank may make no representations, but we Aim to. Zillow says this house is worth $1.1 million, which might Account for why the bank sat on its collective Ass for An Absolute Annum After they foreclosed. That means $250 thousand of Alleged instant equity for you, the buyer! What Are you Anticipating?  You Assume every listing has an Attractive Appearance by Instagram?

Arrive in your Automobile, And Ask your Agent to Arrange for An Attractive Advance deposit! Actung!  This Allotment is still Active! And that Aerial Aspect sure is Attractive!  Remember, Abode, Address, Area!

And… do you think we’re going to Adjust the daily Alphabet in All of the 25 Afterward Articles? Absolutely not. April Fool!

It’s almost time for the weekend, and that means more Open Houses!  Now that Daylight Savings Time is fully in force, we can dispense with Winter Bubble and move directly to Spring Bounce.  So let’s have a look at this stupendously staged showcase, courtesy of Burbed reader Darkhorse.  Thanks very much!  And remember, if you have the perfect (by which we mean not at all perfect) listing for our front page, send it on in with your nominating speech, and you can also have your completely arbitrary internet handle turned into a tag!

1621 HURST Ave
San Jose, CA 95125
$1,245,000

3 Beds
3 Baths
2,150 Sq. Ft.
$579 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1984
Lot Size: 6,435 Sq. Ft.
On Redfin: 3 days
Property Type: Detached Single Family
Stories: 2
Community: Willow Glen
MLS#: 81307527
Style: Tudor
View: Neighborhood
County: Santa Clara

Upcoming Open Houses

Saturday, Mar 16: 1:00-4:00 pm
Sunday, Mar 17: 1:00-4:00 pm

Regular & As-Is Sale, a Unique Custom Built Tudor Style Home w/ many upgrades in the last 4 years; Master suite w/ fireplace, guess bedroom, Sauna & Den upstairs; Master bed, 3rd bath w/ shower/steam room, kitchen, pantry/wine cellar, separate laundry area w/ butler downstairs; Beautiful landscaping; 2+2-Car Garage w/ compressor, lift, upstairs Art Studio/Recreation Room/Storage & Long Wide Drive Way.

What did Darkhorse find so Special about this house?  Surely it wasn’t just the compressor.

Willow Glen Listing — Thought you might enjoy this listing. The photos are stunning,  maybe a new staging technique, wonder if the tiger and swords are included with the purchase price.

Tiger? Swords? Darkhorse, how could you possibly miss the DOG PET HANGING OUT?  (Burbed reader DonnieJ says that’s a cat.)

Guess when a house has staging of this caliber, the buyer won’t mind that a Unique Custom Home w/ many upgrades in the last 4 years needs to be listed as-is. But don’t worry, it’s a REGULAR SALE! Park anywhere on the Long Wide Drive Way.

We’re covering the housing bubble 24/7 now that everyone’s paying attention to real estate again.  Today we have a lovely home in Redwood City that you may have seen before.  Take another look, while you still can!  Thanks very much to Burbed reader Petsmart Groomer for an excellent surveillance operation.

715 ESTHER Ln
Redwood City, CA 94062
$450,000

2 Beds
1 Baths
750 Sq. Ft.
$600 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1929
Lot Size: 4,790 Sq. Ft.
On Redfin: 33 days
Property Type: Detached Single Family
Stories: 1
Community: Cordilleras Heights
MLS#: 81303054

Beautiful view of bay and city lights. Additional 6900sqft lot to be sold with the property. The additional 6900 sq ft parcel of land CANNOT be developed upon per city and county building department. Building square footage 1130sf on public profile is incorrect, actual living area is about 750sf, Fixer-upper Sold "As Is" may not qualify for FHA.

This house’s list of tag may be bigger than it is.  Not only that, it has a history!

Here’s something it didn’t have last year (besides an extra hundred thou of instant equity you get now!): Redfin Agent Insights!

“Dead End,” “Completely gutted” and “Killer Views,” three phrases that don’t go well together after watching certain movies.  How about Zero Dark Thirty?

It may be just the tip of the Krazy Kool-Aid effect, but this is not how a reasonable housing market should work.  Thanks very much to Burbed reader Wendie (as well as additional fans) for bringing this textbook definition of Irrational Exuberance to our attention.

559 TENNYSON Ave
Palo Alto, CA 94301

Listed for $2,088,000 on 1/25/2013
Price changed to $2,088,888 on 1/27/2013
Sold for $2,820,000 on 2/25/2013

2 Beds
1 Baths
1,353 Sq. Ft.
$2,084 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1921
Lot Size: 7,500 Sq. Ft.
Sold On: Feb 25, 2013
Property Type: Detached Single Family
Stories: 1
County: Santa Clara
Style: Cottage/Bungalow
Community: Old Palo Alto
MLS#: 81302338

Located in the heart of wonderful old Palo Alto with top rated schools on a large 7500/SF lot. Charming 2 bedroom 1 bath plus den. One oversized bedroom. Hardwood floors , utility basement, and detached Garage. Sold as is in its present condition. Offers to be reviewed after 2/8/2013.

We’ll have plenty more evidence as we move into Spring Selling Season that the Real Bay Area is in a Real Bubbly Attitude.  Maybe this can be the First 35% Overbid of Spring.  Now let’s hear from Wendie.

This realtor did an amazing job with the photos of this house! How else could this 3/1 1300 square foot house have sold for 2.8 million dollars?? 800K over asking prices. 

I mean, did you ever think that taking photos of a 1920′s bathroom and a CORNER of a room could do such magic?

x

You’re simply not giving the agent enough credit, Wendie.  I see at least TWO corners.  What, do you think these houses just sell themselves?

Updated 11:30 AM – Second house found; see end for details and plenty of pix!

AOL has been doing a real estate area for a while, including a series of videos and articles beyond the listings and search tools. Someone over there must have been reading us, because they did a piece discovering that (gasp!) there are very expensive yet definitely crappy houses for sale in the Real Bay Area.  Worse, they had the gall to call this an “AOL original.”

Have they been living under a rock? This has been our signature claim for more than seven years! Let’s listen in as self-important talking heads who don’t bother introducing themselves tell us what we already know.  (Warning: dude with beard is extra smug.)

M’kay.  There’s some really useless accompanying text, so our mission is to do a slightly better job.  Remember, it’s fairly easy to succeed when you set your standards this low.

Decrepit Homes in San Francisco Bay Area Fetch Top Dollar for Mountain Views

By AOL Real Estate Editors | Posted Feb 21st 2013 5:14PM

A sorry-looking shack, with deep cracks in the cinder-block walls and busted windows, that looks like it’s ready to collapse: You wouldn’t pay a dime for that, would you? OK, say it’s nestled in the gorgeous hilltops of the San Francisco Peninsula with no shortage of pristine mountain views. Now how much would you pay? More than $1 million? Well, that’s how much it’s going for.

We’ve probably violated Fair Use by quoting an entire graf, because there’s only one more.  There’s also only two homes in the video, and only the more than $1 million OMFG Emerald Hills (Redwood City) place (shown above in a clip from the video) has mountain views.  The other (at left, also clipped from the video) is in Willow Glen, and didn’t seem to have any views beyond the neighborhood street.

We were able to find the place in Emerald Lake in about 3 minutes, and it definitely could use a big ol’ Burbed sloppy kiss, Of course it’s already pending.  This is the Real Bay Area we’re talking about!

209 LAKEVIEW Way
Redwood City, CA 94062
$1,275,000

3 Beds
2 Baths
1,490 Sq. Ft.
$856 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1948
Lot Size: 0.38 Acres
On Redfin: 207 days
Property Type: Detached Single Family
View: Mountains
County: San Mateo
Stories: 1
Community: Cordilleras Heights
MLS#: 81228879

Incredible opportunity in Emerald Hills. Originally three lots under two APN#’s (APN #057-031-480 and APN #057-031-049) which have been combined into one lot at approximately 25,150 SF. The value is in the land and the views of the surrounding hills with easy access to 280. Walk the site and let your imagination run wild. Dream big and build new or renovate. Plans are available for viewing.

We didn’t have the same success in finding the Willow Glen weedery.  This one is similar to it (Craftsman style bungalow, over 12,000 square foot lot, to be sold as-is) but we don’t think it’s the right house.  Can any enterprising Burbed readers find the house in the video? 

Update: House in video found by Burbed reader Chris. See end of this article for details and photos. We’ll also throw in a break as this is starting to get long, so click on through!

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Ah, Woodside, home of the record-breaking property sale.  Also home of Larry Ellison (well, one of of homes, because he sold the other one).  Point is, Woodside is for CEOs and Venture Capitalists, not worker bees.  WRONG!  Today’s featured property, courtesy of Burbed reader holyzoo, shows that Entry Level in Woodside is welcoming you to Executive Acres!  Read on and find out why!

125 Ware Rd
Woodside, CA 94062
$649,000

2 bed, 2 bath
1,180 sqft
Single-Family Home
14 Days on Trulia
411 views
Style: Detached, Cabin – Woodside, CA

125 Ware Rd Charming rustic cabin surrounded by redwoods, in State Scenic Skyline Corridor. Includes parcel # 067-042-020 at .35 acre, 15,682 sq ft. Total of both lots is .9065 acre 39,922 sq ft. They are level lots. Home needs repair and is being sold “as is”. It is ideal for a contractor or handyman. Den was third bedroom but now lacks a closet. Outbuilding garage is currently not usable.

 

Now lacks a closet? Therein lies a tale!  Here’s more from holyzoo:

Brother to another… etc. . you know the cliche… I have been tracking your website for a LONG time, saving untold sums avoiding therapist bills.

I’ll keep on keeping on, and probably begin to send you more crap than you want, but this busted me up today. We were looking at Mid-Peninsula Skyline properties today – one was a granny shack for $650k. As dated as 1930 can provide.. be prepared for major dryrot repair, complete remodel, or better yet, tear it down and rebuild.

W00t! Teardown! Value is in the land, which is why they’re making more of it. Two parcels, no waiting.  And yes, the granny shack was built in 1930, which means it qualifies for the old house tag!

And so convenient!

That’s right, who doesn’t love a pink house?  Especially a pink house in San Jose!  How about East San Jose, because that’s what Burbed reader Tracy Tea House has found for us.  And once more, you are TOO LATE.  Seriously, would you get off your butt and buy another house? Do you want to be PRICED OUT FOREVER in Bubble 4.0?

50 PICKFORD Ave
San Jose, CA 95127
Listed for $324,950
Sold for $391,000 on 11/28/2012

3 Beds
2 Baths
1,381 Sq. Ft.
$283 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1930
Lot Size: 10,000 Sq. Ft.
Sold On: Nov 28, 2012
Status: Sold
Property Type: Detached Single Family
Stories: 1
County: Santa Clara
Style: Craftsman
Community: Alum Rock
MLS#: 81239001

BANK OWNED REO! Excellent opportunity to own a home with lots of upside potential. Property has two garages, both have had permits pulled but never finaled. Property needs lots of work and is to be sold in its present “AS IS” condition. Home is in fairly good condition inside but you will need to replace some doors and windows. Some kitchen appliances are missing.

Opportunity! Potential! Fairly good condition! Unfinaled permits! Bank Owned REO! (What other kinds of REO are there?) What are you waiting for, don’t walk, don’t run, rent a helicopter and FLY over there right now!  Let’s listen in on Tracy’s nomination speech:

Pink and dismal. So much more than “some of the appliances are missing.” How about the sheet rock? Stinking Pink, tiny halls, open toilets, this bank owned house has it all.

Is this the “RBA?” I like the three pictures of the street in the wild west of East San José.

Wild West is right, they even show the broken windows.  We don’t know where Tracy got the above shot because it’s not on Redfin, and ZipRealty wanted us to sign in (As If, ZipR!)

Enjoy the pictures.  We included a bunch, because we never know when some real estate site will make us sign in.  The street, the open toilet, and many more right after the break.

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If you haven’t already gotten up at 5 a.m. to start shopping for holiday bargains, you’ve still come to the right place!  Thanksgiving is over, so get on your steel-toed cyber boots, the better to kick your fellow shoppers out of your way!  Yes, it’s time for Burbed‘s Black Friday Sales, where we find the absolute rock-bottom in housing prices all around the Bay!  And we’re opening an hour early just for you!

Here’s how Black Friday Sales will work this year. We’ll again feature the cheapest properties in each county all around the Bay Area, plus some of our favorite cities.  But we won’t forget that our readers are sending in listings as well, so you just never know if each day will be a Sale Property or something else entirely.  You’ll just have to tune in every day to find out.

Let’s begin our sales in Silicon Valley, because even Googlers like to bargain-hunt.  Here we go, the absolutely cheapest house in all of Santa Clara County!  Ready?

8282 Murray Ave #97
Gilroy, CA 95020
$18,000

1 Beds 
1 Baths 
542 Sq. Ft.
$33 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1966 
Lot Size: — 
On Redfin: 38 days
Status: Active
Property Type: Mobile Home (Single Wide), Mobile Home (Expando)
County: Santa Clara
Community: Morgan Hill/Gilroy/San Martin
MLS#: 81237950

Pre-owned, 1966 Kit, 1 bedroom/ 1 bath Single-wide mobile home in a senior park (one owner must be at least 55 years of age). Includes refrigerator, washer & dryer and window air conditioner. Low space rent!

Oh, not what you had in mind?  Even with a low space rent of $560 (which will probably double as soon as you finish signing those papers at the title company)?  Even with 15 pictures?

If you insist, there’s this.

5591 CARRYBACK Ave
San Jose, CA 95111
$245,000

2 Beds
2 Baths
1,121 Sq. Ft.
$219 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1989
Lot Size: 2,184 Sq. Ft.
On Redfin: 265 days
Status: Active
Property Type: Attached Single Family
Community South San Jose
MLS# 81208122
Stories: 2
County Santa Clara

Good home conveniently located. This is a short sale. Please do not disturb occupants.

Whatever developer named this street sure has a twisted sense of humor, because it’s a short sale.  There ought to be a Piggyback Lane here too.  Be sure to check out the listing history, because this place has gone pending four different times in the last three years, plus it sold in 2000, yes, twelve years ago, for $247K.

What? You want a detached house?  Okay, but this is your very last chance.

2138 HURAN Dr
San Jose, CA 95122
$248,000

3 Beds
1 Baths
912 Sq. Ft.
$272 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1960
Lot Size: 5,150 Sq. Ft.
On Redfin: 16 days
Status: Active
Property Type: Detached Single Family
View: Neighborhood
County Santa Clara
Stories: 1
Community Alum Rock
MLS# 81240311

Another opportunity to own this 3 bedroom 1 bathroom single Family home located in San Jose. Very close to shopping centers, mall, and schools. Easy access to freeway 101. Sell is an “AS IS “ condition. Some dual Pane windows. Garage converted but permits unknown.

Oh, we’ve got a winner here! This one has everything! It’s also selling shortly, plus questionable permits and for sale as-is.  The listing copy mentioned the “easy access” to 101, but they didn’t mention the just as easy access to Reid-Hillview Airport. Hope you like the sound of takeoffs and landings!

And remember, more Black Friday Sales to come!

Happy Thanksgiving!  Sorry today’s house is late, as we were up all night prepping for a Burbed Feast.  Did you know how difficult it is to cut up the Real Bay Area into Census districts of half inch cubes without crossing any zip codes?

Now on to our entree. Today’s house was sent in by one of its former owners, a Burbed reader who wishes to remain anonymous.  Can’t imagine why!

361 Ardis Ave
San Jose, CA 95117 
Price:  $555,000

Loan Payment:  $1,902/mo
Bedrooms:  4
Bathrooms:  3
Size:  2,943 sqft
$/Sqft:  $188/sqft
Type:  Single Family House
Year Built:  1951
Lot Size:  9,424
Days on Movoto:  547 days
Sold Date:  05/31/11
MLS#:  81123441
Status:  Sold for $535,000

Contractors special-Huge Lot w/ Unlimited Potential. Build your Dream Home near Santana Row/Valley Fair.

Here’s what our unnamed fan has to say about today’s main course:

The house that keeps on giving.. Yes I was one of the people who lost money on this West Valley Brigadoon. The person who bought it from me, never did one thing he said, just held it and turned it for my profit… This wreck has been untouched through 4 sales…

Will the next buyer be able to rehab this behemoth???

Bad houses happen to good people :-0

This house was sent in just a week and a half ago, but the usually suspect real estate sites have it marked as sold already.  Either our correspondent just noticed his/her old place changed hands after almost two years on the market, or there’s a more recent listing we’re not finding.

Hey, Redfin, pass the white meat!  Click on through if you’re joining us from the front page.  The table is groaning.

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