December 8, 2012

No entry allowed under any circumstances

121122-blackfridayThis is our last CHEAPEST HOUSE IN THE WHOLE COUNTY OMFG entry.  With Solano County’s turn, we’ve run out of Bay Area counties to feature in our Black Friday Deals Deals DEALS, which of course will run right up until Christmas Day.  Future deals will find you the best value in select Bay Area cities (and by “select” we actually mean whatever we want that to mean, optimizing for maximum pointing and laughing).

121207-adams-redfin1328 Adams St
Fairfield, CA 94533
$30,000

3 Beds 
1 Baths 
1,277 Sq. Ft.
$23 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1954 
Lot Size: 5,227 Sq. Ft. 
On Redfin: 17 days
Status: Active
Property Type: Residential, Detached, Single Family
Stories: 1
County: Solano
Style: Ranch
Community: Fairfield
MLS#: 21226257

Home sold for land value only. Home has suffered extreme fire damage and is unsafe in current condition. No entry is allowed under any circumstances.

Maybe you could pick this one up for Chanukah tonight? It will cost less than many new cars, and remember, they’re not making any more land! With prices like these, even the furthest reaches of the Bay Area are hot, hot, HOT! (Disclaimer: Property currently at ambient temperature.)

There’s instant equity galore, as this house sold for $112,000 in (hold on to your jellybean bag) 1990.  This is not only a fire sale, but a foreclosure too.  Here’s what it looked like back in 2009.

121207-adams-streetview

There’s something about the feng shui of this house that led to fire prevailing against the overdone water element.

And a quick glance around the neighborhood in 2009 shows it was reasonably well-kept, but there’s an unusually high pickup truck to automobile ratio.  But on the bright side, it has a Walk Score of 72.

Comments (2) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:02 am






December 5, 2012

Far from the maddening crowds [sic] in Napa County. Rural Napa County.

121122-blackfridayYou thought we forgot about our Black Friday Deals Deals DEALS? Of course not!  We’ll be throwing in our rock-bottom sale items whenever the mood strikes us, and right now, the mood slapped us silly while saying, “Hey, how about you find another Cheapest In The Whole County” item?  We’ve only got two counties in the Bay Area left, so today we’re headed up to the Whine Country!

Warning: This is definitely not The Real Bay Area.

121204-lariat-redfin205 LARIAT St
CA 94567
$89,900

3 Beds 
2.5 Baths 
2,504 Sq. Ft.
$36 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1993 
Lot Size: 0.74 Acres 
On Redfin: 181 days
Status: Active
Property Type: Residential, Single Family
View: Canyon, Hills, Mountain, Valley
MLS#: Lc12071394
Style: Two Level
County: Napa

Far from the maddening crowds. .. your own private sanctuary located in Berryessa Estates! This home features parquet flooring in the dining area and living room. The living room has a fireplace with bench seating, two decks on either side while offering open access to the dining area right off the kitchen. The Master is located on the main floor and also 121204-lariat-kitchenoffers access to one of the two decks. Master bath features jetted tub to chase the cares of the day away. Downstairs is an oasis with a large family room with pellet stove and 2 additional bedrooms, bath, laundry room and the patio. Decks overlook the valley, what a great way to unwind! True there is work to be done but if you’re seeking seclusion, put this property on your list and take advantage of this great price reduction!

True there is work to be done.  Maybe it could start with rounding up this home a city to go with its street address.

121204-lariat-stairsWhat else needs to be on your list?  That is, aside from the bills from Cal Fire, the problems with the water and sewer services, and the growing number of foreclosures in the area due to residents unable to pay the huge water and sewer service bills. And bonds.  And fines for sewage spills.

Looks like if you move here, you’ll be tied up with all these exciting challenges!  But not as challenging as the previous owners who bought it in 2004 for $355K and were lassoed into foreclosure seven years later! 

Now when we said this place was rural, we weren’t kidding. You’ll be getting along your little dogie for a spell finding the place.


View Larger Map

Now will someone give this realtard a copy of the Hardy novel

Comments (6) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:09 am

December 3, 2012

Let’s Return to our Holiday Shopping — in Sonoma County!

121122-blackfridaySo here’s the DEAL, the DEALS, yes we still have DEALS for you. Black Friday Deals are back!

We’re scouring the Bay Area for the cheapest houses out there! Today we’re taking a good look at Sonoma County, to find the absolutely, positively cheapest, least expensive, smallest asking price house for sale.

 

121202-first-redfin71 1st St
Camp Meeker, CA 95419
$100,000

2 Beds
2 Baths
1,040 Sq. Ft.
$96 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1920
Lot Size: 1,307 Sq. Ft.
On Redfin: 13 days
Status: Active
Property Type: Residential, Detached, Single Family
Community: Sebastopol
MLS#: 21226308
Stories: 1
County: Sonoma

2 bed 2 bath house

The good news: This house is barely sporting a six-digit pricetag!  Plus the agent took more than one photo!

121202-first-kitchenThe bad news: Is that moss growing on the roof?

The interior photography is intriguing.  It appears this agent is doing whatever is possible to not include a single square inch of the floor in any shot, which means most of them tend to show ceiling.

Lots and lots of ceiling.  This view of the kitchen only shows a little, but for this vintage stove, plus the solo wall-mount cabinet unit, along with the distressed treatment of the door, we could not resist.

And you could not resist this price. Sure, the house has a FAR of 0.796, but what do you want for just one homeowner spending unit?

Comments (3) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:09 am

November 29, 2012

Two words that don’t go together: Marin and Cheap

121122-blackfridayWe’re continuing our DEALS DEALS DEALS all week long!  As we work our way further and further from our usual comfort zone, we’ll be visiting the entire Bay Area, or at least every county. 

Today we stop off at the one with a serious diversity shortage.  Yes, we’re talking Marin County, where diversity means there’s a redhead in your kid’s class.  And we’ve found you the absolute cheapest house in Marin.

121128-ocean-redfin57 Ocean View Ave
Dillon Beach, CA 94929
$275,000

Price 
2
Beds 
1
Baths  680 Sq. Ft.
$404 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1927  Lot Size: 1,830 Sq. Ft.  On Redfin: 351 days Status: Active
Property Type
Residential, Detached, Single Family
Stories
1
County
Marin
Style
Cottage
Community
Dillon Beach
MLS#
21131349

One level, no stairs.

121128-ocean-frontFour pictures, no trash.

1,830 square foot lot. Wow. When someone said they weren’t making any more land, guess whoever owned this property said, “Nuh uh! I’m going to build a bunch of tiny shacks and sell them on 1/9 acre lots and I’ll be rich, rich!”

Now if you want to be rich, rich as well, you had better start buying up property in Marin now.  Because right now certain neighborhoods in San Francisco are ultra-hot with all those well-paid high-tech engineers and social media purveyors and game-engine optimizers.  Now what do you think is going to happen when these people get married and have kids?

121128-ocean-satelliteWell, nothing.  But what do you think is going to happen when their oldest kids start turning four? They’re going to be out the door to the land of Safe Public Schools in time to register for Kindergarten. Watch Marin values skyrocket then.  You read it here first.

Remember, a little of something is better than renting a lot of nothing.  And today’s Black Friday Deal is about as little as you can get.  But it’s a little sliver 600 feet from the beach… and a little less of a walk every day!

121128-ocean-beachfront

Comments (15) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:02 am

November 28, 2012

Danger Man visits Santa Cruz County

121122-blackfridayWe’re continuing the DEALS DEALS DEALS with yet another region full of cheap housing. Today’s victim: Santa Cruz County!  But wait, you may rudely point out. Santa Cruz County is not part of the Bay Area.  It does not have any part of it touching the Bay.

Oh yeah?  What’s Monterey Bay, chopped liver?  Plenty of people commute to Silicon Valley from Santa Cruz County.  Maybe even Googlers.  Presenting, the cheapest house in all of Santa Cruz County!

121127-hazel-redfin575 HAZEL BRAKE
San Lorenzo Valley, CA 95006
$115,000

2 Beds 
1 Baths 
900 Sq. Ft.
$128 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1943 
Lot Size: 0.45 Acres 
On Redfin: 1 day
Status: Active
Property Type
Detached Single Family
Stories: 1
Community: Boulder Creek
MLS#: 81241767
Style: Cabin
View: Neighborhood
County: Santa Cruz

DO NOT visit property with out an Agent; stairway, deck and house could be dangerous. This is a major fixer-upper, however it is in a great neighborhood. Bracken Brae has hiking trails, picnic grounds, private water system and roads with lovely river access just for owners.

121127-hazel-trashbinsWhen a property listing starts out with a warning like DO NOT visit property, we know it’s going to be good. And unlike the places we found earlier this week, this one has more than 2500 square feet of land.  It also has more than one picture, which means more work for us. 

At left is Picture number two.  Out of 24. Believe us when we say this is one of the cheerier views.

Also, catch the not-so-subtle reminder that rentards aren’t deserving of anything: lovely river access just for owners.  This is like Foothills Park, except living in Palo Alto is nowhere as exciting. For this dangerous listing, DO NOT go anywhere (especially stairway, deck and house) with out an Agent. DO NOT even look at these photos.

121127-hazel-insulation121127-hazel-granite121127-hazel-family121127-hazel-wall

This agent deserves some kind of award, for either Whole Truth In Real Estate Photography, or for skipping the worse views that weren’t included.

Comments (12) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:03 am

November 27, 2012

Low Prices? Nobody beats us for low prices: Contra Costa Edition

121122-blackfridayYesterday’s house seems to be a disappointment to some of you. There were some critics calling out the neighborhood, or maybe the neighbors. Maybe you don’t understand what we’re doing here.  We said we would find you the cheapest house in every county.  We are then doing that. If the neighborhood isn’t la-di-dah enough for you sip-your-tea-with-a-raised-pinky types, just keep your jodhpurs on. We’ll include some Real Bay Area cities in our Black Friday Deals.

Just… not yet!  Today, the cheapest house in all of Contra Costa County! Behold!

121126-cutting-redfin2819 CUTTING Blvd
Richmond, CA 94804
$49,950

1 Beds 
1 Baths
694 Sq. Ft.
$72 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1940 
Lot Size: 2,500 Sq. Ft. 
On Redfin: 48 days
Status: Active
Type: Detached
Stories: 1
County: Contra Costa
Style: Bungalow
Community: South Richmond
MLS#: 40592250

Must See To Appreciate

This is the house. You want it? Must See to Appreciate. No lookie, no value go up.  Simple.  Boom.  But only one photo. Can’t really see it. And you must see it. You must to appreciate.

121126-cutting-satellite

Think writing a listing like this is easy? Sure. Writing listings is easy. You just sit down by an MLS terminal and bleed.

Comments (6) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:02 am

November 26, 2012

Cheapest House yet for Cyber Monday!

121122-blackfridayWe’re not just having Black Friday deals, we’ve got the cheapest housing all throughout the Bay!  Today we’re looking for the cheapest house in Alameda County.

Think you can’t afford a house? Boom. You could buy this one and still have enough left over for… oh… ANOTHER HOUSE.  The argument e-store is now offline.

 

121125-91st-redfin1351 91ST Ave
Oakland, CA 94603
$39,888

1 Beds 
1 Baths 
634 Sq. Ft.
$63 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1927 
Lot Size: 2,725 Sq. Ft. 
On Redfin: 5 days
Status: New
Type: Detached
Stories: 1
County: Alameda
Style: Traditional
Community: Oakland
MLS#: 40596586

Nice started home, good for investor. Bring your offers

That’s right! Bring it!  When you do, maybe you can figure out what’s in the structure in the back and why the roof looks, um, distressed.

121125-91st-satellite

They did say it was a nice started home. You just have to figure out what they started.  But look on the bright side.  It’s a gated community!

Comments (12) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:03 am

November 25, 2012

Black Friday All Week Long! San Francisco Savings!

121122-blackfridayLet’s continue our DEALS DEALS DEALS as we look at the cheapest houses in every one of the Bay Area Counties, and then in some favorite cities!  Today, “The City by the Bay.”  Wait, if you live in the Bay Area, that means some of your County is already by the Bay. 

Okay, today’s Black Friday DEAL is from The City In San Francisco County By The Bay.  Game on!

 

121124-harkness-redfin320 Harkness
San Francisco, CA 94124
$359,000

2 Beds 
1 Baths 
840 Sq. Ft.
$427 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1900 
Lot Size: — 
On Redfin: 5 days
Status: Active
Property Type: Junior, Single-Family Home
Community: Visitacion Valley
MLS#: 403079
Style: Contemporary
County: San Francisco

Short sale subject to lender approval. Tax records show 2 bds, 1ba; however, there are 2 bds and 1 ba downstairs–currently unknown as to legality. Owner occupied, vacant at COE. Open Sunday, Nov. 25 from 2-4pm. Agents please see agent remarks.

Yes, you can check out this 112 year old “Contemporary” at the Open House today!  Let us know about the legality of what you find downstairs.  Note that during our Black Friday Deals we are not responsible for the loss or misplacement of any street name qualifiers.

You know what else this property offers?

121124-harkness-listing-history

Instant equity, baby!  It’s Baaaaaack!

Comments (6) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:08 am

November 24, 2012

Deals Continue! Cheapest Place in San Mateo County!

Just because it isn’t Black Friday anymore doesn’t mean the DEALS stop!  Let’s see what you can get if you want to live in San Mateo County but don’t want to break the bank.  Or rob the bank.  Or get a ginormous bail-out because you’re a bank.

121123-3rd-redfin719 3RD Ave
San Bruno, CA 94066
$388,880

2 Beds 
1 Baths 
820 Sq. Ft.
$474 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1940 
Lot Size: 3,700 Sq. Ft. 
On Redfin: 7 days
Status: Active
Property Type: Detached Single Family
Stories: 1
Community: Belle Air
MLS#: 81241202
Style: Ranch
View: Neighborhood
County: San Mateo

Lovingly kept & lived by current owner for a long time. Per county record it is 3BR/1BA; however, 3rd BR has no closet. Walking distance to BART/CalTrain/Elem School. Easy access to HWY 101 for commuting to SF, E. Bay and So. Bay. Regular Sale (Not a Short Sale or REO). Open House 11/18(Sun 1-4 pm) & 11/25(Sun 1-4 pm). Offers, if any, due by 11/25,3 pm. Information believe to be accurate but not verified.

121123-3rd-kitchenWe’re already doing better than yesterday’s cheapest property in Santa Clara County, because the first find is an actual, detached house.  It’s also eligible for the “cozy” tag, but you can’t have everything, can you? Come on, this is vintage pre-war, and it looks like it’s still in vintage condition! Plus that awesome “No, no, no, this isn’t a distressed sale, really!” plaint in the listing copy.

You want a house? You now have zero excuses. Plus, just like yesterday’s third house, easy access to both 101 and the airport!

121123-3rd-satellite

This house is the deal of the century! (Information believe to be accurate but not verified.)

Comments (7) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:05 am

November 23, 2012

Day After Thanksgiving? Time for Black Friday Sales!

121122-blackfridayIf you haven’t already gotten up at 5 a.m. to start shopping for holiday bargains, you’ve still come to the right place!  Thanksgiving is over, so get on your steel-toed cyber boots, the better to kick your fellow shoppers out of your way!  Yes, it’s time for Burbed‘s Black Friday Sales, where we find the absolute rock-bottom in housing prices all around the Bay!  And we’re opening an hour early just for you!

Here’s how Black Friday Sales will work this year. We’ll again feature the cheapest properties in each county all around the Bay Area, plus some of our favorite cities.  But we won’t forget that our readers are sending in listings as well, so you just never know if each day will be a Sale Property or something else entirely.  You’ll just have to tune in every day to find out.

Let’s begin our sales in Silicon Valley, because even Googlers like to bargain-hunt.  Here we go, the absolutely cheapest house in all of Santa Clara County!  Ready?

121122-murray-redfin8282 Murray Ave #97
Gilroy, CA 95020
$18,000

1 Beds 
1 Baths 
542 Sq. Ft.
$33 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1966 
Lot Size: — 
On Redfin: 38 days
Status: Active
Property Type: Mobile Home (Single Wide), Mobile Home (Expando)
County: Santa Clara
Community: Morgan Hill/Gilroy/San Martin
MLS#: 81237950

Pre-owned, 1966 Kit, 1 bedroom/ 1 bath Single-wide mobile home in a senior park (one owner must be at least 55 years of age). Includes refrigerator, washer & dryer and window air conditioner. Low space rent!

Oh, not what you had in mind?  Even with a low space rent of $560 (which will probably double as soon as you finish signing those papers at the title company)?  Even with 15 pictures?

If you insist, there’s this.

121122-carryback-redfin5591 CARRYBACK Ave
San Jose, CA 95111
$245,000

2 Beds
2 Baths
1,121 Sq. Ft.
$219 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1989
Lot Size: 2,184 Sq. Ft.
On Redfin: 265 days
Status: Active
Property Type: Attached Single Family
Community South San Jose
MLS# 81208122
Stories: 2
County Santa Clara

Good home conveniently located. This is a short sale. Please do not disturb occupants.

Whatever developer named this street sure has a twisted sense of humor, because it’s a short sale.  There ought to be a Piggyback Lane here too.  Be sure to check out the listing history, because this place has gone pending four different times in the last three years, plus it sold in 2000, yes, twelve years ago, for $247K.

What? You want a detached house?  Okay, but this is your very last chance.

121122-huran-redfin2138 HURAN Dr
San Jose, CA 95122
$248,000

3 Beds
1 Baths
912 Sq. Ft.
$272 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1960
Lot Size: 5,150 Sq. Ft.
On Redfin: 16 days
Status: Active
Property Type: Detached Single Family
View: Neighborhood
County Santa Clara
Stories: 1
Community Alum Rock
MLS# 81240311

Another opportunity to own this 3 bedroom 1 bathroom single Family home located in San Jose. Very close to shopping centers, mall, and schools. Easy access to freeway 101. Sell is an “AS IS “ condition. Some dual Pane windows. Garage converted but permits unknown.

Oh, we’ve got a winner here! This one has everything! It’s also selling shortly, plus questionable permits and for sale as-is.  The listing copy mentioned the “easy access” to 101, but they didn’t mention the just as easy access to Reid-Hillview Airport. Hope you like the sound of takeoffs and landings!

And remember, more Black Friday Sales to come!

Comments (7) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 4:01 am