June 30, 2010

This house needs finishing touches – like walls

$429,900

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Beds: 2
Baths: 1
Sq. Ft.: 1,110
$/Sq. Ft.: $387
Lot Size: 6,450 Sq. Ft.
Property Type: Detached Single Family
Stories: 1
Year Built: 1912
Community: Carlmont
County: San Mateo
MLS#: 81001900
Source: MLSListings
Status: Active This listing is for sale and the sellers are accepting offers.
On Redfin: 162 days
CONTRACTOR/INVESTORS SPECIAL! HOME NEEDS FINISHING TOUCHES, LOCATED IN A GREAT NEIGHBORHOOD OF BELMONT, LARGE LOT. THIS PROPERTY HAS A LOT OF POTENTIAL!!

Thanks to Burbed reader Sam for this find!

Here’s what Sam had to say:

Not that Belmont is ghetto or anything, but something about this house reminds me of whistle-tips- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nnzw_i4YmKk

Check out that new siding!  Dayumn!  That’s not a contractor’s special- that is modern art!  It’s a statement about the cost of conformity!  Why, oh why would the bank want to get rid of this post-post modernist masterpiece?  This is installation art taken to its next level!  I mean, hell, if a shark in formaldehdye can sell for $12M  (http://www.stuckism.com/Shark.html) this place ought to be worth at least $6M.  If this place came with some shark’s teeth, it might be worth $12M too.  Shark’s teeth are frickin cool!

To the realtor’s credit, the disclosures are made openly- “HOME NEEDS FINISHING TOUCHES”.  This kind of statement speaks volumes about perspective.  When I think about finishing touches, I think about adding outlet colors, picking color schemes, hanging drapes, etc.  These guys think about $100K remodeling jobs.
But the realtor really nails it with his/her description- “THIS PROPERTY HAS A LOT OF POTENTIAL!!”  Like potential energy.  Like potential to be blown over in the next storm.

Woot-woooooooot!

Uh, Sam… they’re practically giving this house away. All you need to do is add a little elbow grease… and some walls… and… uh… some innovation.

Personally, I think this house enables you to express your freedom. Therefore, if you hate this house, you hate Freedom. Why do you hate freedom this close to July 4th? Are you a terrorist?

Comments (7) -- Posted by: burbed @ 5:59 am