December 23, 2012

Sh*t Realtards Say

Here's a little something to keep you going into the holidays.

 

Comments (2) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:21 am






November 19, 2012

Like Google Streetview? You’ll LOVE Google Houseview!

Burbed reader nomadic informs us of a major Google Maps update.  Guess it’s not rolling out to everyone at once because we haven’t seen it yet.

121118-houseview-yesno

Awesome sauce! This is going to change real estate, because now, who needs to wait for an Open House or an agent to put together a Virtual Tour?  With this new feature, you can see a home’s interior layout, room sizes, fixtures and decor with just a few mouse clicks.

Bunus: Think of all the homes that will now qualify for the Burbed Good Housekeeping tag of approval!

1211180-houseview-in

Comments (6) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:02 am

November 4, 2012

Worst Realtard Ad Ever?

Yes, this is an actual ad, even though it ran in The Onion.  This is definitely one of the more interesting approaches to pounding the pavement for new clients (he’s certainly pounding something), and we first found it at The Fiscal Times, in a slideshow featuring more listing fail.  Guess we managed to miss it when it hit the big time on Boing-Boing.

121103-wanket

This is in a completely different class of self-promotion than, say, writing cute little jingles about yourself.  Then again, as long as the jingles aren’t NSFW, the jinglemeister won’t have Wanket’s results:

Calls and emails to Mr. Wanket were not returned and an Edina Realty spokesperson said the ad didn’t adhere to their guidelines and he’s no longer with the company.

In case you’re wondering just exactly why this ad does not adhere to Edina Realty’s guidelines, we have their answer:

“Well, first of all, it didn’t have the required Fair Housing notification on it,” [Vice President of Marketing Lynn] Clare said.

Let us know about how other real estate agents grab your attention, either in a good way, or if they unintentionally end up beating you off.  P.S. Wanket is no longer in the real estate industry.  Can’t imagine why.

Comments (3) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:09 am

October 6, 2012

Story Time!

121005-shadow-storyWow, what a week!

We started off with a bang, or at least a toilet that could have used some blowing up.  We had an abandoned construction project featuring garage space for seven cars. Not only did we have a Burbed-style debate, our Friday feature wasn’t just the usual mawbul kawlum love.  No, that house turned out to have had a murder take place on the property… while the owner was in court defending someone accused of an even more infamous murder just a few miles away.  That’s the East Bay for you!

Good thing we’re just going to sit back and read a delightful children’s story now.  It’s all about you and your shadow… inventory.  Thanks very much to the shadowy folks at Movoto for this terrific tale.  You can check out their blog for other real-estate-related tomfoolery.

Have an idea for other great kids’ books that would do double-duty explaining real estate trends?  Share them here, or share anything you want in this Weekend Open Thread.  Any Open Houses in your book?

Comments (9) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:05 am

September 8, 2012

Calling things what their logos look like

120907-logos-oaklandThere’s a cute piece over on Buzzfeed that renames all 32 NFL teams according to what their logos resemble, instead of what the team is actually called.  For your enjoyment and discussion purposes, we’ll share the Bay Area entries.

F’rinstance, you may recognize this as the official sigil for the Oakland Raiders.  According to Buzzfeed, this is actually the Oakland Swords ‘n’ Severed Heads.  They left out that the severed head had an eyeball removed.  Sloppy, sloppy. 

120907-logos-sfAnd this design on the right, which breaks out of grayscale, is for the San Francisco Forty-Niners, right? Not if you name the team starting 120907-logos-sdfrom the logo.  Then it’s the San Francisco Abbreviations for San Francisco.

Here’s one more, and also from California. Ladies and Gentlemen, put your hands together for the San Diego Cartoon Character’s Hair!

I hope you see where this is leading. 

120907-logos-apples

Here is the corporate logo for a major tech firm, including a couple of guesses on how the image may evolve.  Got any better names for this company than the first thing that pops into your mind?  The far-future version looks more like Pac-Man.

120907-logos-starbux

Not a Bay Area company, but quite familiar to us.  Again, the last three entries are inspired guesses.  What is this a logo for, shampoo?  Contortionist classes?

120907-logos-firefox

This one’s tech-related plus the 21 December meteor strike leads to severe climate change.

120907-logos-winx

Flags getting bricked, vaporized, sliced, englobed, dissolved and now, speaking of flags…

120907-logos-w8

120907-logos-msA new logo was announced earlier this year.  Here’s the redesigned Greek flag at left, ready for when they leave the European Union.  We say it’s a Chanukah present.

Then the corporate parent got a logo update.  But when they changed the flag for the whole EU to go with…  We call it FourSquare®: A Way To Make You Pay $40 for a Game Court You Could Draw with a Piece of Chalk (ball not included).

 

120907-logos-sun120907-logos-chip120907-logos-xx120907-logos-asj

 

120907-logos-narCan you identify these tech company logos?  More importantly, can you name these tech companies based on what each logo looks like? We get

  • 8 purple magnets
  • A half-screened green eye
  • Red cable-wrapped beachball
  • Now landing on red runway 1

Surely you can do better than this.  In fact, surely you can do best of all with this one at right.  Or discuss anything else you wish in this Open Thread.

Comments (36) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:07 am

July 8, 2012

Open Thread and Game Time

While you’re waiting for the realtards to show up at any Open Houses this weekend, why not play a board game with your loved ones?

Burbedopoly

It’s a little difficult to make out the street names, so here’s the list.  See how many of the cities representing each color group you can identify!  And do let us know which streets  you would use instead of the ones we picked.

120707-monopoly-streets

120707-monopoly-chance

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Alas, we were not permitted to rename the utilities PG&E and SANTA CLARA VALLEY WATER DISTRICT.  Do you have any good ideas for some Chance and Community Chest cards?

And yes, this is also an Open Thread.

Comments (9) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:07 am

July 1, 2012

You Know You’re Really from X When You Y

Recently seen in the San Francisco Chronicle:

You Know You’re a Real Marinite when you…120630_marin_kids

…Think a redhead adds “diversity” to your kid’s class… (Deanne Fitzmaurice / The Chronicle) / SF

and…

120630_berkeley

120630_sunnyvale_libbysHa.  If we only see three Priuses parked anywhere around Google, it’s only because the rest of the vehicles are plug-in electrics.

So… let’s hear your suggestions for X and Y, where X is your city or town, and Y is whatever you come up with to best exemplify its essence.

We’ll start.  You Know You’re Really from Sunnyvale, when you can’t come up with anything other than the general case using the letters X and Y where X equals “Sunnyvale” and Y remains undefined for now but might have something to do with a gigantic can of fruit cocktail.

But we’re sure you can do better with whatever place you call home.  RBA-only entries not required, but please confine your suggestions to Northern California locales.  (We do have SOME standards around here.)

120630_billboard_box

You can also nominate your entire region, such as “You Know You’re Really From Silicon Valley when you 1. See a billboard like this, 2. Understand it, and 3. Contact the advertiser for a better job.”

The best examples will be featured in a future weekend column, complete with random photos!  Your name or handle on the front page!

Okay… go!

 

Comments (12) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:02 am

June 23, 2012

Saturday Open Thread: Rename that Island

Happy weekend! Going on a vacation? Of course not! The Real Bay Area is so awesome, you’ll staycate all summer. And what could be better than going to work, anyway?

Unless your name is Larry Ellison, and you can afford to buy most of a Hawaiian island for yourself.

Your mission is to rename the island to something more appropriate. Like Larai.

Update: Oh yeah, this is also an open thread. Duh.

 

Comments (35) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:07 am

May 5, 2012

What I Really Do

actually

It’s Saturday.  Go look at some Open Houses and tell us what they’re really worth.  Oh yeah, Open Thread.  Go really wild.

Comments (12) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:18 am

April 29, 2012

Open Season on Open Houses

120427-openhouse

Anyone been to an Open House lately?  Are buyers waiting for a drop?  Are sellers trying to hold it?

Open the door and tell us what you found inside.

Comments (21) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:11 am