It’s always fun when a house previously featured on Burbed comes back for a second look. Sometimes it’s a flip that’s awful in a new way, sometimes it’s the same problems ensuring that the house will be bidless for a long, long time.  Today’s Mountain View mansion, courtesy of Burbed reader dollarbin, has some changes since its last appearance, but it’s not just the house that’s had things moved around.

290 CHIQUITA Ave
Mountain View, CA 94041
$888,000

BEDS: 3
BATHS: 3
SQ. FT.: 1,565
$/SQ. FT.: $567
LOT SIZE: 4,414 Sq. Ft.
PROPERTY TYPE: Detached Single Family
STYLE: Traditional
STORIES: 2
VIEW: Neighborhood
YEAR BUILT: 2009
COMMUNITY: Downtown
COUNTY: Santa Clara
MLS#: 81150934
SOURCE: MLSListings
STATUS: Active
ON REDFIN: 48 days

Curb Appeal-Perfect 10. Own this 2.5 yr old Single Family Home for the price of MV townhomes and Condos. Warm & BEATIFULLY designed. Very energy efft/extra insulation w/ E. Eff appls. Showroom finish 2car garage. Gated access for added security/privacy n kids to play. Walking dist. to Downtown restrnts/shops/farmrs mrkt/CalTrans & Parks. Xcllnt APIs for schools. Nice fenced back yard w/ patio. NO HOA Dues.

And here’s a reminder of how the house looked in its previous incarnation:  (warning, 180 comment thread)

Here’s what dollarbin has to say about why you should take another look at 290 Chiquita:

One of burbed’s most talked about houses is back on the market, baby!

What’s more, unlike 2009, it now sports lucky 8′s in the price tag.

Plus, unlike 2009, the assigned elementary school will be Castro, rather than having to schlep your kids across El Camino into the fancy side of town to attend Bubb with all of those obnoxious rich kids.

Also, thanks to Habitat for Humanity, you’ll have new neighbor families enjoying “eight ownership homes for ‘very low- and low-income families’ ” at 300 Chiquita Ave.”

You may object that the “Xcllnt APIs for schools” was not intended to be a factual statement, and there will be BMR housing next door.  The crime rate might be higher than you’re comfortable with.  You may not be too excited about the sex offender who lives around the corner on Villa Street.  And two different Redfin agents complained about how small the bedrooms are.

None of this matters in the least.  The agent presents picture #21 to refute all Negative Nellie natterings.

Start your overbidding!

14165 JERILYN Dr
San Jose, CA 95127

$249,000

A nice wall defending against the street. A gate. A driveway cover.

If Osama Bin Laden were alive and living in San Jose, this is a place that he might appreciate.

Which is exactly why the Realtor used (I’m guessing) a Google Street View image of the house. To simulate what you might see from a drone! Can’t get more realistic than this!

Incidentally, here’s the full picture:

What exactly is that thing next to the walkway to the house?

If you want DEALS, DEALS, DEALS, you came to the right place!  Not only are the BLACK FRIDAY DEALS continuing, today’s DEAL is in Redwood City!  You just never know what’s going to pop up there!  Pop pop!

Undisclosed, Redwood City, CA 94063
$208,000

BEDS: 2
BATHS: 2
SQ. FT.: -
LOT SIZE: 2,500 Sq. Ft.
TYPE: Detached
STYLE: Contemporary
STORIES: 1
YEAR BUILT: 1957
COMMUNITY: Redwood
COUNTY: San Mateo
MLS#: 40534692
SOURCE: EBRD
STATUS: Active
ON REDFIN: 147 days

SHORTSALE

The agent didn’t waste any words on this listing, so we won’t either.  But this house definitely earned its “Good Housekeeping” tag of approval.

Address disclosed: 516 McArthur Avenue.  You’re welcome.

“Bunus”!  Looks like this place is in a gated community!

Poor Mr. Zip.  The United States Postal Service put him out to pasture in 1986, when they introduced the ZIP+4 postal codes.  But he was a familiar sight in the 1960s, urging everyone to include the new ZIP (Zone Improvement Plan) postal codes when sending mail.

Mr. Zip might not be around to nag you on addressing envelopes, because he’s in retirement.  Mr. Z writes to say he hopes this series will go on forever, because he can’t play Name That Code all the time.

Today we bring you yet another installment of all the Northern California cities on Forbes’ Most Expensive Zip Code list.  It features data crunched by local favorite Altos Research (and mangled by Forbes; you’d think after I’ve linked to them four different times and noted in each article that their data has a systematic error in every single entry, maybe somebody there would fix it, but NOOOOOOOO).  Anyway, here’s what you may have missed while writing code or hanging out on a sunny sidewalk waiting to collect a faceful of pepper spray.

Previous Entries in the Most Expensive Zip Code Series:

• Top 50 Most Expensive Zip Codes, RBA Edition
• Next 50 Most Expensive Zip Codes, Almost-RBA Edition
• Third Tier Realty: Zips 101-200 or I have a feeling we’re not in the RBA Anymore
• Fourth Tier Cul de Sac: Submillion in Suburbia

Now, we’ll take the Fifth!  Fifth Tier, that is; the Top Half of the Bottom 200!

Let’s see which cities can still scrape together a property median wishing price just under $850K.  Remember, we correct the mistakes as we find them, and we added the comparison to last year’s list.  That’s the kind of original work you’ll only find done by obsessive-compulsive bloggers who think zip codes are fascinating.  Well, Mr. Zip certainly agrees!

#304: San Mateo 94402

• Median Home Price: $849,292
• Median Price Change: NA
• Average Days On Market: 200 114
• Inventory: 114 81
• Rank in 2010: 236 (-68 spots ⇓)
• Most Expensive Home: $13 Million

Now I am beginning to think that the people at Forbes were just making stuff up for that “Most Expensive Home” field.  $13 million.  In San Mateo.  The most expensive place I could find sold for $3.3 mil in June, including the gated entryway.  It’s just like what you get in mid-level condoplexes, including calling itself an ESTATE (complete with the CAPITAL LETTERS).

Ah, but that living room does look spacious enough to hold a very small charity ball.  More goodness from Mr. Zip after the break!

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Thanks very much to Burbed reader Swan for this find!  It’s great to know that nobody’s going to stiff Sunnyvale for bragging rights to the most expensive residence in the entire country, so take that Yuri Milner!

104 BRISBANE Ter, Sunnyvale, CA 94086
$652,000,000

BEDS: 3
BATHS: 2.5
SQ. FT.: 1,777
$/SQ. FT.: $366,911
LOT SIZE: 4,489 Sq. Ft.
PROPERTY TYPE: Attached Single Family
STORIES: 2
VIEW: Neighborhood
YEAR BUILT: 1988
COMMUNITY: Sunnyvale
COUNTY: Santa Clara
MLS#: 81148138
SOURCE: MLSListings
STATUS: Active
ON REDFIN: 1 day
NEW LISTING (24 HOURS)

Beautifully remodeled home that features high vaulted ceiling, new flooring throughout, granite countertops and dual sinks in both bathrooms, 2 fireplaces, gated community. Must see. Home is located close to downtown Sunnyvale(shopping), and Cal Trains. Centrally located, 10 minutes to Google , 7 minutes to Apple Co. Be in your dream home before Christmas!!

Here’s what Swan had to say when sending this beautifully remodeled home in:

Here’s a townhome in Sunnyvale (not even Cupertino schools) for $652,000,000!  Talk about a typo (hopefully).  Someone needs to go back to elementary school and learn some place value.

10 min. to Google and 7 min. to Apple.  I think I see a price reduction in the near future!

Just because Trulia has this property designated as Off-Market, formerly listed for $670K, don’t be so sure this is a typo.  Look at all you get with this house:

Not only beautifully remodeled, the agent spelled “remodeled” correctly.  You can’t ever count on that (see tomorrow’s listing for proof of that).

High vaulted ceiling: You know what that means?  Right.  Bank vault.  This house is selling for upwards of half a billion dollars because a former Washington Mutual VP was bringing too much high-value work home.

New flooring throughout: More places to hide money!  This house is going to be the best treasure hunt ever!

Granite countertops: Say no more!  Granite!  If you’re going to decorate like it’s 2006, you might as well pay like it’s 2006!

Dual sinks: This property will be have a water view twice as fast as a normal place would!

2 fireplaces: If you don’t make your money the old-fashioned way, you can BURN IT.

Gated community: You get a “clicker” to keep the riff-raff where they belong: in 99 percentville.

Close to downtown Sunnyvale(shopping): I’m glad they tell you what is in downtown Sunnyvale.  I thought it was for watching construction projects repeatedly fail.

and Cal Trains: Whoo-whoo!  I hope you like Cal Trains, because you’re going to hear every one of them!

Centrally located: Miles from a freeway no matter what direction you go.  Hope you like traffic lights!

10 minutes to Google: Are you sure? I was able to Google this property in about five seconds.

7 minutes to Apple Co: Siri, turn this traffic light green immediately.

Be in your dream home before Christmas!!  And save $8,150,000 with Redfin!  Wait, wait, I almost forgot… this house has a gold star!  Let’s see what the Redfin agent thought of it:

But does it have a shed-like structure?  Because if it doesn’t, I’m only offering $651,990,000.

Update: Price reduced to $652,000 at 9:13 am.  That’s a 99.9% cut, which is a perfect promo for our Black Friday Sales!

What will it take to make the zip code series stop?  Lots and lots and lots of quality submissions!  So until you send in your best guest post EVEH, we’ll be running these wonderful lists and photos for the next few hundred Sundays or until we run out of data, by which time Forbes (if they’re still a going concern) will have the 2012 list ready.  But look on the bright side.  No more annoying maps like last year!

Today we look at all the Northern California entries in Forbes Most Expensive Zip Codes 2011: The Top 100 of the Bottom 400.

Previous entries in this year’s series:

• Top 50 Most Expensive Zip Codes, RBA Edition
• Next 50 Most Expensive Zip Codes, Almost-RBA Edition

Quick recap: Forbes messed up their data even worse than usual this year, plus many areas on last year’s list have completely disappeared without explanation.  We add in the comparison to last year’s rankings and find the “most expensive” house (if it’s findable) that Forbes mentions for each entry.  While Forbes doesn’t seem that interested in hearing from their readers (registration is required), Altos Research, who did the number-crunching, loves talking data.  They’ve responded to a couple of my concerns here.

Here we go, numbers 101-200, which are now under the Million and a Half Median!  How Low do we have to go to sink under a million?  Remember, this is the Third Tier, so Real Bay Area (RBA) bragging rights are gone (except for some exceptions).

#106: Alamo 94507

• Median Home Price: $1,396,000
• Median Price Change: -7.8% ⇓
• Average Days On Market: 200 134
• Inventory: 134 102
• Rank in 2010: #101 (-5 spots ⇓)
• Most Expensive Home: $11.8 Million (322 Lark Lane)

This high-end (for the East Bay) location south of Walnut Creek is stuck in atop the third tier right where it belongs, just a few spots above Newport Beach.  This luxury home that looks more like an administration building kind of says it all.  Free architectural clue: It’s the windows that make this place a façade fail.

A new $13.8 million property has come on the market since the Forbes article ran, and it has a more traditional (and attractive) look, in the classic “Let’s build a French country estate in Contra Costa County” style.

Plenty more to enjoy after the break!  In fact, we promise the very next one is a Burbed favorite, so click on through.

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It’s Halloween Weekend, so we’ve got a couple of creepy pieces for you both days.  Today, another dispatch from Beijing, courtesy of The New York Times.

Harassment and Evictions Bedevil Even China’s Well-Off

By ANDREW JACOBS,
Published: October 27, 2011

Photo, right: Yan Lianke outside his house, to be demolished.  (Shiho Fukada for NYT)

BEIJING — It is a familiar tale of modern China with a sadly predictable denouement. A group of people wake up to find demolition notices affixed to their homes. After they reject the government’s compensation as too meager, a dark campaign of harassment ensues. The bulldozers arrive in the dead of night. Score another win for the boundless authority of the state.

But the struggle unfolding at Huaxiang World Famous Garden, a gated, suburban-style community on the exurban fringe of the capital, is not like a majority of redevelopment battles that each year lead to the forced eviction and dispossession of countless families.

(Photo, left: A banner vows to sacrifice “our blood and lives” to save homes.  Shiho Fukada for NYT.)

The residents involved are by and large middle class and privileged — doctors, financiers, retired government bureaucrats — who thought they were immune to such capriciousness. Among their ranks is one of China’s most successful fiction writers, Yan Lianke, whose satirical novels about famine, AIDS and the cruelties of the Cultural Revolution plumb the suffering of ordinary Chinese.

Just as notable is that their subdivision is new, the oldest house no more than five years old. At least three of the homes were completed this year. The local district government, however, says the residences and their pampered gardens must give way to a road-widening project that was announced in July. Everyone was given just three weeks to leave.

This is what happens when the rule of law is a complete fiction.  Moneyed interests, working hand in glove with a powerful government, and even supposedly rich people end up losing their homes… to even richer people who want that well-situated land.

Aren’t you glad we live in the United States?Instead of obnoxious sound trucks, nasty text messages, mysterious thugs and early morning bulldozers, we just have the banks forge some title documents and claim they own your house because some ginormous spreadsheet somewhere says they do.  And didn’t we have Alan Greenspan propose burning houses down as the low-cost strategy?

This is why the word “Occupy” combined with any geographic place name is now banned as a search term in China.

And if you think this is scary, just wait until you read tomorrow’s article. Meanwhile, this is an Open Thread.  What Open Houses are you visiting and what Tricks will you play there?

I read a lot of real estate sites in order to bring you Burbed-worthy features.  Recently, I found an agent’s special “Astonishing Homes” page that looked absolutely scrumptious.  Plenty of seven and even eight-figure high-end properties on acres of land with great schools.

Now I know absolutely nothing about this particular agent, but all these homes were on MLS. Member agents can detail any MLS listings in their region, and Sophia Delacotte put together a webpage with nicer luxury properties for people to get some real estate pr0n action.  But something was amiss when I took a closer look at the actual listings.

With ten different houses, that’s ten front facades and ten sets of details.  I have all that waiting for you inside, but before you join me, make your prediction how many of these ten estate properties:

• Sold (pending within 7 days)
• Sold (pending within 30 days)
• Sold in a longer timeframe
• Are still active on MLS
• Had their listing withdrawn
• Had a price reduction at some point

For “bunus” yucks, guess how many of these ten estate homes have marble columns.

Got your guesses ready?  Good.  Now, let’s see these Astonishing Homes and find out if you’re as Astonished as I was.

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Today’s featured property was sent in by Burbed reader Swan.  Thanks very much for this big, big, big listing with the small, small, small number of photos.

 

16450 AZTEC RIDGE Dr, Los Gatos, CA 95030
$19,995,000

BEDS: 6
BATHS: 8
SQ. FT.: 11,257
$/SQ. FT.: $1,776
LOT SIZE: 50 Acres
PROPERTY TYPE: Detached Single Family
STYLE: Contemporary
STORIES: Tri-Level
VIEW: Bay, Mountains, Neighborhood, Valley, City Lights
YEAR BUILT: 1991
COMMUNITY: Los Gatos/Monte Sereno
COUNTY: Santa Clara
MLS#: 81137011
SOURCE: MLSListings
STATUS: Active
ON REDFIN: 45 days

Spectacular one of a kind property situated on approx 50 acres in one of the most unique settings in the World! Birds-eye views encompassing the entire Silicon Valley from downtown San Jose all the way to San Francisco. Modern architecture of approx 20 years old with amazing ceiling heights and open floor plan with sep guest house of over 2000 sq ft. Private and gated at end of quiet cul-de-sac.

Here’s what Swan had to say about this listing:

Here’s a $20 million property with only one picture.  Today’s blog made me think of this house.  A contrast between $200K in Gilroy with nine of the exact same pictures and a $20 million property with only one picture.

A contrast all right, and don’t forget this place in San Francisco with 23 pictures at about 1/70th the price.

Clearly this listing is an intelligence test.  Most average tech workers could find an address on the MLS, or at least on a site like Redfin or Trulia.  But can you find this house’s Special Secret Private Website?  Hint: there are no hints on MLS.

Click on through to have a look at the pictures the agent doesn’t feel you deserve to see, but first, see if you can find the website yourself.

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Thanks very much to Burbed reader AstroWallaby for this amazing listing in East San Jose.  Not only does it have lots of yummy features for your approval, this is probably the first listing I’ve seen on Redfin with a typo in the address.

 

3167 andora Dr, San Jose, CA 95148
$715,000

BEDS: 4
BATHS: 2
SQ. FT.: 1,564
$/SQ. FT.: $457
LOT SIZE: -
PROPERTY TYPE: Residential, Detached, Single Family
STYLE: Ranch
STORIES: 1
YEAR BUILT: 1965
COMMUNITY: Santa Clara
COUNTY: Santa Clara
MLS#: 21122622
SOURCE: BAREIS
STATUS: Active
ON REDFIN: 40 days

One of the best homes on the block! Shows pride of ownership throughout, meticulously maintained. Almost everything updated and upgraded. Custom Paint throughout w/ neutral colors, raised panel doors including closets, beautiful lamiate and marble floors, updated dual pane windows, custom sink, granite shower in master bath, beautiful custom tile vanity, new appliances in kitchen, marble counters, gourmet oak cabinets. Too much to list. A must see

Here’s why AstroWallaby brought this home to our attention in comments:

Description… could be worse, although I have to wonder about “blood red” being described as a “neutral color” and there’s something about the pictures of the bathroom which cracks me up. (I think I’m picturing that white curtain opening up and revealing a packed studio audience while someone’s squatting on the pot, forcing them to immediately launch into a scatological improv routine.) On the plus side the kitchen comes with yummy “gourmet oak cabinets”. Can you eat just one?

(Perhaps their addictive cheesy crunch will drown out the sound of gunfire from White Road.)

Mostly what makes it “Burbed”-ish is the price. $715k, when even Zillow thinks the max it’s worth is $462k. (Or to put it another way, $457 a square foot in a neighborhood where the sold average is in the $300 ballpark.) Those had better darn well be *delicious* cabinets.

I want to know if either the kitchen or the bathroom has a lamiate and marble floor, myself.

And not only is this house conveniently located near all the action on South White Road, it’s also just a hop, skip and a jump next to two other terrific features of East San Jose.

No, not the liquor stores.  But it isn’t that far away from Lake Cunningham and Raging Waters, and it’s also close enough to Reid-Hilllview Airport that I’m curious why the upgrades stopped with only dual pane windows.

AstroWallaby was right on to call the place a teensy bit overpriced for the neighborhood.  The current Zestimate is $385,100, which means there are already several houses in just this little slice at left coming in higher, including the place two doors down with the $508K tag (maybe because it sold for $650K in 2005).

Perhaps it lists for so much more because, despite its location, location, location in East San Jose, the agent is purporting that it’s actually in Santa Clara.

Yeah, that would account for at least $250K of the price.  You’d get far more respect from your colleagues if you lived over there.  Then again, imagine how much more this place would list for if the realtard had taken the trouble to look up how big the lot actually is.  (6018 square feet.  Which is a lot better than, um, nothing.)

Now if only they could get that street name capitalized, the seller could probably mark it up another $50K.  I know a great place where they could pick up a few extra easy As.