Yeah, we’re still Taken with this Blogging from A To Z Challenge, and if you don’t like it, Too bad. Um, we mean ‘Twill be all over next week. So let’s find That Typical Burbed post, where we contrast Things that don’t go Together. 

Today we’re Twist Terrific Terroir with Tired, dare we say Tortured listing photos? Let’s Take a Trip to Tiburon!

24 Red Hill Cir
Tiburon, CA 94920
$950,000

HOA Dues: $423/mo.
2 Beds
2 Baths
1,574 Sq. Ft.
$604 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1990
Lot Size: 701 Sq. Ft.
On Redfin: 38 days
HOA Dues: $423/month
Style: Contemporary
View: Bay, Forest/Woods, Greenbelt, Hills, Lights, Mountains, Panoramic, Water
County: Marin
Property Type: Residential, Attached, Condominium/Coop/Other
Stories: Split-Level
Community: Tiburon
MLS#: 21305218

Highly desired Red Hill Circle. One way, private street. All prior sales minimum $1,000,000+ without upgrades or any remodeling done. Views are spectacular of Richardson Bay to Sausalito with full silhouette of Mt. Tam. Lots of entertaining and happiness here.

If all The prior Transactions were in seven digits, Then what The heck is wrong with This place? It can’t be just The Terrible pix, because There’s proof That There’s little To Tamp Bay Area Bubble 4.0 This Time!  Remember, buy now or be priced out forever!

Bunus: can you find The DHO in photo #19 (the last one)? Without upgrades or any remodeling done!

We’re back with our second week of the Blogging from A to Z Challenge, so let’s resume! Today’s post is brought to you by the letter G. And when we hear G on this blog, we think of our absolutely positively favorite development eveh! That’s right, G is for Gables End! Thanks very much to Burbed reader Petsmart Groomer for Guaranteeing Gables End will always be one of our Guideposts.

If you’re a new reader to Burbed, you may not have heard of this townhouse complex before. Gables End was built right at the end of the Bubble, on some land that was under the Gentle Guidance of the EPA, but the development sold out anyway.

Why? Close to Google!

851 DONOVAN Way
Mountain View, CA 94043
Sold for $740,000

3 Beds
3 Baths
1,352 Sq. Ft.
$547 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 2008
Lot Size: —
Sold On: Mar 6, 2013
HOA Dues: $197/month
Stories: 1-3 (Low Rise)
County: Santa Clara
Property Type: Townhouse
Community: Rengstorff
MLS#: 81305251

Fabulous newer townhome! Wonderful floor plan with lots of natural light throughout. Open kitchen has granite counters & ample cabinets, spacious living room w/ large windows, wood flooring throughout main level, crown molding & decorative touches throughout. High ceilings. Lots of storage both inside & in the attached 2 car garage. Close to park, shopping & freeway access. Don’t miss!

We all missed it! Gone in four days!  And Given our Generous coverage of the Gables End Gin-up, watching a resale Generate a Greater fool buyer at 9.6 percent above asking price just brings tears to our collective eyes. And it’s no Glitch! Here’s another Gables End unit, asking $719,000, virtually Given away for $805,000!

You Get it, even Gables End is now part of the Greater RBA. Oh, this is just so Gorgeous.

We’ve made comments about certain property listings where the photos seem more suited to an art gallery than a home website. Today’s house, though, is in a class by itself for serious WTFness. This San Jose museum masterpiece is so moved miles more than the masonry mainstream that it was nominated by two different Burbed readers within 24 hours: z2amiller and mtv-renter.

Grab your AudioTour listening device, slip on your headphones, and enjoy these curated images from a Cambrian townhouse available right now through your favorite real estate professional.  Or pick your least favorite realtard just to make ‘em have to look at it.

5692 HOLLYLEAF Ln
San Jose, CA 95118
$485,000

HOA Dues: $329/mo.
2 Beds
2 Baths
1,102 Sq. Ft.
$440 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1973
Lot Size: 2,120 Sq. Ft.
On Redfin: 9 days
HOA Dues: $329/month
Style: Traditional
Community: Cambrian
MLS#: 81308592
Property Type: Townhouse
View: Green Belt, Neighborhood
County: Santa Clara

This home is a work of art! Upon entering you will be amazed at the artistry of the tile floors and walls These amazing mosaics were designed by a true artist. This colorful home features a remodeled kitchen with granite counters updated appliances copper sink double pane windows 2 spacious patios 2 car garage and a great location in the complex across from a green belt Must See one of kind Home!

Tile? That roof above looks just fine for a place in California.  Although somebody please give this listing agent some punctuation.

Ooooookay, the patio is just a touch on the loud side.  Things are about to get louder, so click on through. Warning, eye protection is strongly recommended.

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Most of our submissions come to us via email (contact info available in the upper right hand column).  Today’s featured fortress, from the wilds of San Jose Country Club near Santa Teresa del Fuego, was passed on to us via the Bat Signal. A Redfin Forums reader started a new thread and suggested that this home ought to join the Real Bay Area Is Awesome article, better known as What Can You Buy In The Bay Area for $3.3 million?  Well, let’s find out, courtesy of Burbed Reader HomeBuyer25!

5752 COUNTRY CLUB Pkwy
San Jose, CA 95138
$3,350,000

HOA Dues: $120/mo.
7 Beds
8.5 Baths
13,100 Sq. Ft.
$256 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 2006
Lot Size: 0.53 Acres
On Redfin: 1 day
Status: Active
HOA Dues: $120/month
Style: Mediterranean
View: Bay, Green Belt, Mountains, Canyon, Neighborhood, Valley, City Lights, Golf Course
County: Santa Clara
Property Type: Detached Single Family
Stories: 3
Community: Evergreen
MLS#: 81309594

Prestigious Silver Creek Valley Country Club! Premium oversized parcel 23,140 sq. ft. featuring 13,100 s. f. residence w/ separate full guest quarters. Space for 7-14 vehicles, weight room, full basement, extra rooms for storage, dance or artist’s studio, wine cellar, bowling alley, wrestling etc. Amenities include radiant heated marble slab floors, 22 ft foyer, gym & theatre, 600 amp panel etc.

600 amp panel? Sold!  And that’s just for starters!

Because you know what else this place has? Elegance! Prestige! Why it’s boisting wit’ klayuss! Why? Kawlums!  Everything’s better with kawlums!

Although, not so fast. A look at the property history suggests this place has been on the market a lot more than one day. Or one time.  Take a look at the death throes of someone’s dream:

Hey, the price has been going back up for almost a year! Even the short sales show that Bay Area Bubble 4.0 is firmly inflated!  Blurry pictures, Christmas at Easter, more than a 50% haircut with amazing price history going back six years, and if you spent this much money in Palo Alto, there wouldn’t be a kawlum in sight!

Is that #winning or what?

Now, everyone submit your best prediction on what will be the winning overbid!

Want to look at Open Houses but inventory is too low? Here’s yet another reason why Bay Area Bubble 4.0 is in full swing for Spring: Flash sales. Redfin coined this term for a house that’s in contract within 24 hours of being listed.

They also made a list of how many flash sales there have been in the last five months in each of the markets they cover, and San Jose came in 15th out of 15 with 74 quickies. San Francisco didn’t even make the cut at all!  All-time flash sales champion? Phoenix, with 540.

8271 SKYLINE Cir
Oakland, CA 94605
Sold for $650,000

3 Beds
2.5 Baths
2,090 Sq. Ft.
$311 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1998
Lot Size: 10,119 Sq. Ft.
Sold On: Dec 26, 2012
HOA Dues: $140/month
Style: Traditional
View: Bay, Greenbelt, Water
County: Alameda
Type: Detached
Stories: Split Level
Community: Skyline/Oakknoll
MLS#: 40598366

Amazing Oakland hills. 3/2.5 w/ extra office space. Incredible living space with 10ft ceilings, beautifully appointed thru/out. Chef’s kitchen with custom island, grnite, countertops, s. s. appliances. Electronic window coverings, deck with bridge views, gorgeous pergola/ backs to open space. Perfect!

This Skyline Circle home in Oakland was a Flash Sale and is featured on the Redfin Blog. It sold quick, and for list price. This is how we know Oakland, even in the hills, is not the Real Bay Area. Everyone knows Real Bay Area homes sell way over asking.  Also RBA homes don’t fester on the market for a year and a half until the Bubble finally blows up again.  The HOA dues are just the sickly sweet icing on the Not RBA cake.

Location: Oakland, CA
Listed By: Lynda Divito, Redfin
Listed: December 14, 2012
Pending: December 14, 2012
Closed: December 24, 2012
List Price: $650,000
Final Sale Price: $650,000

“This house never even hit the market! We had a brokers’ tour in the afternoon on the very same day the house was to hit the market. A broker came in with his buyers who offered all-cash at full list price and with the quick closing we had requested, making it an easy choice for my clients to accept their offer that same day.” - Lynda DiVito, San Francisco Bay Area Redfin Agent

Planning on visiting any Open Houses today? Let us know of any suitcases full of cash changing hands you see. This is also your Weekend Open Thread, so sky’s the limit!

The National Association of Realtors (NAR) isn’t known for deep thinking.  After all, this is the group that brought you David Lereah, America’s very own Baghdad Bob on the topic of forecasting home values.  But let’s take a closer look at the idea that NOW is always the time to buy. After all, if now is not the time to buy, then now is the time to sell.

Turns out NAR has that one covered.  They’ve got a list of the best places to buy and sell, NOW.  And guess where is the time to sell NOW.

That’s right.  Where it’s Special.

Asheville, NC Tops Best Places To Buy In 2013

Real Estate News   |  Feb 14, 2013   |  By: Lexie Puckett | Realtor.com

The new year started on a positive note in January, with inventories at record lows and list prices holding steady on a year-over-year basis. Whether this shows a continuation of the nascent housing recovery into 2013 will depend on a variety of factors, including the strength of the overall economy, the cost and availability of mortgage credit, consumer expectations regarding future housing prices, and the success of continuing efforts to stem the flow of new foreclosures.

If inventories remain low — and if list prices begin to rise during the next few months, as they did last year — conditions are ripe for additional house price appreciation in 2013. However, such gains are likely to be concentrated in markets already well into their recovery process, such as California, Phoenix, Seattle, Washington, D.C., and many sand states. Markets in the older industrialized parts of the Midwest and the East will likely continue to struggle without a significant turnaround in their local economies. However, if inventories in these areas remain high, it could effectively set the stage for further declines in housing values in these local markets.

2013 Best Places to Buy and Sell

With two months remaining before the home-buying season opens, sellers have a huge advantage. In tight markets, such as the top five “Best Places to Sell,” sellers benefit from better prices than they’ve seen in years. In our five “Best Places to Buy,” buyers will find plentiful inventory and prices that haven’t experienced the increases others have seen during the past year.

So wait, are they saying that there actually exist places where NOW is not the time to buy? Well… no, because they would never want to prevent suckers from giving them money interfere with the free market.  Also commissions.

Here are NAR’s Top 5 Best Markets to Sell a House NOW.  Except they didn’t say NOW, but you KNOW it’s THERE.

1. Sacramento. No, really. Inventory dropped even more than here where it really is Special, leading to price increases of (get ready to scream) 40%.  You forgot to invest in Sacramento last year, didn’t you?

2. San Jose.  Prices are up 25% here and inventory isn’t exactly generous. But unlike Sacramento, San Jose wasn’t rebounding from a complete price collapse.

3. San Francisco. They’re just copying us, and not as well.

4. Phoenix. See Sacramento. Inventory is down 16%, but so what? They simply make more land. What they can’t manage to make more of here is water.

5. Washington, DC. “With a median price of $429,900, D.C. is one of the nation’s priciest markets…”  Right, NAR.  You want to see what you can get here, where it’s actually Special, for $430,000?  This.

1889 SHERI ANN Cir
San Jose, CA 95131
$429,950

HOA Dues: $202/mo.
2 Beds
2 Baths
1,157 Sq. Ft.
$372 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1993
Lot Size: 435 Sq. Ft.
On Redfin: 1 day
Status: Active
HOA Dues: $202/month
Style: Contemporary
View: Neighborhood
County: Santa Clara
Property Type: Condominium Stories: 1-3 (Low Rise)
Community: Berryessa
MLS#: 81305233

Upcoming Open Houses

Saturday, Feb 23: 1:30-4:00 pm
Sunday, Feb 24: 1:30-4:00 pm

Dwnstrs condo has bright & open flr plan. Newer carpet, hrdwd flrs in entry & ktchn. Interior has been freshly painted. Spacious patio off of lving rm. Gas stove, dual sinks & recessed lights in Kitchen. Mster bdrm has it’s own patio, walk-in closet, recently updated bthrm, 2 sink vanity. Attchd 1 car garage w/ laundry. Community has large pool, spa, sports court, bbq/picnic area. Great location.

And by “Great location” they don’t really mean “great location.”  Yesterday’s house was “great location.”  This place is “You’re less likely to get shot than on Story Road.”

Now, lest you think all those California metros filling in the first 3 on that top 5 list are some big honking coincidence, here’s some data ripped straight out of NAR’s January Trends report.  The blog entry linked above is distilled from this longer report.

It goes on to confirm what we already knew: It’s Special Here. Then again, it’s even More Special in Sacramento.  Want to know where else it’s surprisingly Special?

Anyone who doesn’t see Bubble written all over these tables simply is not paying attention.

Today’s delicious domicile comes to you from Alameda, the island garden of the Bay.  Or should we say Oakland Afloat? Estuary Estates? Maybe you have an even better name for Alameda than those! Thanks very much to Burbed reader JL for finding a house with a creative command to the buyer.

492 MCDONNEL Rd
Alameda, CA 94502
$599,000

3 Beds
2.5 Baths
1,625 Sq. Ft.
$369 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1992
Lot Size: 3,895 Sq. Ft.
On Redfin: 19 days
Status: Pending
HOA Dues: $365/month
Style: Contemporary
Community: Bay Colony
MLS#: 40601391
Type: Duet
Stories: 2
County: Alameda

Very sunny duet home W/ big lot, great size open backyd, spacious driveway, cul-de-sac. Extra high ceiling grand entrance. Gorgeous new kitchen. double pane window. HOA cover exterior, roof, front yd & insurance. close to ferry terminal. One of a kind. Must see. Nobody pass away inside the house.

Here’s what JL had to say about the house:

Burbed is the best! I had to pass along an Alameda listing that has generous and inexplicable amounts of fail.

First, there’s only outside pictures. Never a good sign. But the best thing is the description. Granted, I think we may have a non-native speaker as the writer, but the last line is hilarious no matter what.

The strange thing is, this looks like a nice house. The redfin Streetview link takes you to a street over a block, but if you go to Google street view directly, it shows a decent-looking place. So the Redfin listing could have been nice, but instead was awesomely bad.

Awesomely bad? It’s not every house that’s not just part of a cookie-cutter tract but a gol-durn “duet home” in a cookie cutter tract that can call itself “one of a kind”! Now that’s awesomely something!  Plus there’s insurance in the front yard! The $365 a month HOA fees are just the cherry on this Win Sundae!

We tried to find the collection of “only outside pictures” without success.  Other listing sites either had the photos removed (with the listing marked as off market) or a slightly different set of photos, inside as well as out.  Here are a couple more, just in case Redfin yanks these bright and early Monday morning. 

And we mean it about the bright, as the Cherenkov radiation is strong in this one.  Just for grins, check out the outdoor pix on Zillow!  Must see.

Serious WHOA.  Of course if we had a yard like that, we wouldn’t pass away inside the house either.

Let’s continue with our post-Christmas clearance sales!  Today’s fabulous find is in the fantastic framework of Milpitas, or as its fun-loving denizens call it, “What’s that smell?”  Thanks very much to Burbed reader Petsmart Groomer for flipping this one forward.

1568 CLEAR LAKE Ave
Milpitas, CA 95035
$359,000

HOA Dues: $270/mo. 
2 Beds 
1.5 Baths 
1,008 Sq. Ft.
$356 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1971 
Lot Size: 810 Sq. Ft. 
On Redfin: 21 days
Status: Active
HOA Dues: $270/month
Stories: 1-3 (Low Rise)
County: Santa Clara
Property Type: Townhouse
Community: Milpitas
MLS#: 81242591

Property well maintained and is ready for its new owners.

Or as PG notes:

It’s ready for a new agent too.

Oh don’t be such a stickler, Petsmart.  Just because the front image took a little rotation ride doesn’t mean the agent isn’t a knowledgeable professional.  Let’s enjoy the rest of the photos.

Excellent.  Start with the exterior shots first and then lure your customers in.

Here the agent skillfully picks up the wooden texture of the bed frame in both the dining room set and the beautifully shining hardwood floor.

Contextual linking continues in subtle ways with the kitchen towels suggesting whimsy, supported by the colorful devil-may-care display on the coffee table.

Now it’s your turn.  Do you see the ingenious way the agent finds elements in common from the living room entry to the bathroom sink?  And nice job leaving out the throne entirely. You’d be surprised how many amateurs not only include it but have the seat raised high.

Ending the photo show with nature at her most bountiful, we also note this property has a location, location, location (!) in a popularly-populated planning potpourri!  You can find everything here!

Let’s finish up our week in The City with some, um, Extreme Real Estate photography.  Thanks very much to Burbed reader Michael Boltonestater for finding this superb San Francisco studio.

1950 Gough St #203
San Francisco, CA 94109 (Pacific Heights)
$495,000

1 bath 600 sqft Condo
Open House:
Saturday Dec 15th, 2pm to 4pm
For Sale / Resale
Listing Details
7 Days on Trulia
397 views

Stunning Pacific Heights Jewel Box. This Lafayette Park view pied-a-terre in a desirable 1920′s steel frame building on top of the hill is sure to charm you with its attitude. Perhaps the most beautiful studio in San Francisco. Impressive chef’s kitchen. Formal dining area with built-ins. Hardwood floors and high ceilings. Handsome black and white tile bath. Inviting sleeping alcove. Good closets. Laundry, strg and small car deeded parking in bldg. Stunning lobby and facade. Elevator. A+ reserves. Professionally managed. Newly renovated Lafayette and tennis courts, Fillmore, Union, Polk, cultural meccas, downtown, Muni and Whole Foods.… Small pets ok.

Sorry, pending, and Redfin’s already yanked the pictures down but you can see the old listing copy, and better yet, the old (2003) price of $335K.  Also the old number of bedrooms (1) and the old HOA dues of $263. What the dues are now is a mystery. Perhaps this is a case of if you have to ask…

The missing photos are really a shame, as this curated photography gallery will really give your eyeballs a great workout.  We’ve included some of the better examples in case Trulia also goes dark on us.

Let’s begin with something you don’t often get to see in real estate photography: an actual action shot.  As you can see, not only is the building painted white, but vehicles can drive right by the front door.  Time-lapse photography illustrates how this could work in real life.

Also, in case the top photo made you wonder about the interior decorating scheme, we have plenty more that should assure you the current owner really did go all in on the burnt pumpkin and expired cream palette. 

Click on through to see those and more!

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It’s time for your weekend!  How about spending it somewhere exciting, like the big city?  (Noooo, we do not mean San Jose.) We’re willing to go toe to toe with the San Francisco real estate blogs when we have to, and when we have to is when it comes to listing fail.  Here’s an Unhappy Hipsters-inspired example of Better Living Through Concrete, courtesy of Burbed reader Petsmart Groomer.  Thanks very much for this snug single in SF!

766 Harrison St
San Francisco, CA 94107
$349,000

HOA Dues: $265/mo.
0 Beds
1 Baths
292 Sq. Ft.
$1,195 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 2008
Lot Size: —
On Redfin: 1 day
Status: Active
HOA Dues: $265/month
Style: Contemporary, Modern/High Tech
County: San Francisco
Property Type: Condominium, Studio
Community: Yerba Buena
MLS#: 402288

Architec-designed living in the heart of SOMA. Cubix is a contemporary community located in th Yerba Buena Arts District. George Hauser designed this modern studio resindence which faces Northwest. Stylishly appointed home with concrete radient heat floors, newly upgraded full kitchen with Bosch appliances and cabinetry, and a balcony. Rare storage is included. Green building features lansdcaped roof deck, BBQ, glass-enclosed outdoor picnic area for private parties, succulent garden. Epicenter Cafe is conveniently located on the first floor. Great location next to Whole Foods, SFMOMA, Metreon.

Not only is it architec-designed, it looks like it was architec-spellchecked as well.  This resindence features radient heat floors and a lansdcaped roof deck.  It also features architec-design suggestive of The Stacks.

One way you know there was an architec involved: lots and lots and lots of pictures of a 292 square foot condo.  Bunus: a price per square foot that gives Palo Alto a shove in the shoulder and says, “Can you beat that? Huh? Huh? Can you?”