July 4, 2013

Declare your Independence… from your home

Here’s another Housing Bubble of a sort to pay attention to: RV sales are up, too.  Thanks very much to Burbed reader Petsmart Groomer for alerting us to this alarming threat to vacation home prices.

RV-buying boom a sign of consumer confidence

By Dan Nakaso, San Jose Mercury News
Posted:   05/29/2013 05:43:55 AM PDT; Updated:   05/29/2013 10:36:14 AM PDT

130703-rv-sweetThe number of recreational vehicles delivered to dealers’ lots is expected to reach a six-year high in 2013 as fledgling RV buyers such as Karen and Jim Smith, of San Jose, shake off the economic slumber of the past few years and prepare to hit the road this summer.

"There are just so many things to see that we’ve never seen before: Mount Rushmore, the Grand Canyon, Lookout Mountain in Tennessee," Karen Smith said after writing a $21,000 check for her 18-foot 2014 White Water Retro Travel Trailer that came stocked with a queen-size bed, separate refrigerator and freezer, two-burner stove, microwave, full-size bath, shower and beds for three more people.

The Smiths represent new hope for a U.S. RV industry that sustained a series of body blows beginning with the 2008 recession but now appears to be rebounding in the Bay Area and beyond.

The industry has not seen more than 300,000 RVs shipped to dealers around the country since 2007, the year before the recession took hold. But deliveries this year were up 11 percent in the first quarter and the RV industry now expects to see a total of 307,300 deliveries of motor homes and tow-able RVs. Tow-ables make up the overwhelming majority of RV sales in the U.S.

Read the whole article. You will learn that yes, RV sales are up even in the Bay Area, despite this place being so awesome nobody would ever need a vacation from it. You’ll also learn that the #1 RV dealer in Northern California is in Gilroy and started up in 2008, right in time for the financial collapse that took out all its competition. Finally, just like there’s the RBA and everywhere else, it turns out there are different degrees of #winning with RVs.

130703-rv-fireworksThe cheapest kind are the ones that get towed, and that’s 90% of all sales. Think of it as the East Bay of Recreational Vehicles. And enjoy your recreation today, because it’s, in theory a holiday. We know that you’re actually hard at work since there are always new End of Quarter Goals now that you didn’t make your old ones.

Speaking of the East Bay, most Walmarts allow RVs to park in their lots, and there are more Walmarts in the East Bay so… just sayin’.

Comments (2) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 7:02 am






April 1, 2013

Always Advance All Alliances: Almaden

BlogAtoZ-AToday is the first day of the Blogging from A to Z Challenge, so we’ll Abjure their Authorized Arms And Affirm our Abecedarian Attempt. And we Aspire to give A tip of the Aviator’s cap to Arlee Bird for Activating this Affair, with over 1700 blogs Associated!  Most All of them Aren’t in the Real Bay Area, so while we Advocate your Auditing Any and All, you Aren’t Accountable to Acquire Any properties.

We’re delighted to be part of this Amazing Alliance!  Now on to today’s Apt Acreage.

130331-almaden-redfin6792 ALMADEN Rd
San Jose, CA 95120
$865,000

5 Beds
3 Baths
2,704 Sq. Ft.
$320 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1969
Lot Size: 7,169 Sq. Ft.
On Redfin: 13 days
Property Type: Detached Single Family
View: Neighborhood
County": Santa Clara
Stories: 2
Community: Almaden Valley
MLS#: 81308508

Large 5 bedroom Almaden home with swimming pool, corner lot. Top Almaden Schools: Graystone, Bret Harte & Leland. Property is Lender-Owned, being sold "AS-IS, " US Bank makes no representations or warranties. US Bank financing available. All US Bank loans to be approved by US Bank. .

US Bank may make no representations, but we Aim to. Zillow says this house is worth $1.1 million, which might Account for why the bank sat on its collective Ass for An Absolute Annum After they foreclosed. That means $250 thousand of Alleged instant equity for you, the buyer! What Are you Anticipating?  You Assume every listing has an Attractive Appearance by Instagram?

Arrive in your Automobile, And Ask your Agent to Arrange for An Attractive Advance deposit! Actung!  This Allotment is still Active! And that Aerial Aspect sure is Attractive!  Remember, Abode, Address, Area!

130331-almaden-aerial

And… do you think we’re going to Adjust the daily Alphabet in All of the 25 Afterward Articles? Absolutely not. April Fool!

Comments (5) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:04 am

March 31, 2013

Easter Eggstra: What’s in Your RBA Easter Basket?

130331-easter-failbasketHappy Easter! This means NOW is the time for Spring Real Estate selling season to begin Bouncing in earnest. We’ve been telling you about Bay Area Bubble 4.0, so just imagine how much win Real Bay Area home prices will have starting tomorrow!

That’s not all the Easter Eggs we’ve found under our bedecked and bowtied basket! Here’s a few more the Burbed Bunny brought to beaucoup browsers.

 

130331-easter-failpricesWe appreciate all our readers who send us awesome listings (and you know by awesome, we mean something that is exactly the opposite of awesome). If you have a great example of Real Estate Fail, send it to one of our email contacts in the upper right corner.

Best of all is when you visit an Open House and take some photos of things that the agent didn’t think best reflected the property’s best features. Yes, we love your photos too!

We also love our readers’ comments. Please be sure to stop by and show each listing as much love as it deserves.

Finally, we’re going to be part of another Big Blog Bonanza. Tomorrow begins a new month, and we’re going to be joining the fun with over 1700 other blogs in the April 2013 Blogging from A to Z Challenge. For many bloggers, the difficulty of merely writing one post every day brings anxiety, fear, or wrestling with the dreaded blogger’s block. We’ve been putting out an article pretty much every day for seven years, but having topics line up with the alphabet will give us an interesting tour of the Bay Area.  Feel free anytime to nominate some suggestions for letters to come!  We’re still wondering just what to do with that pesky letter X.

Comments (4) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 7:03 pm

February 14, 2013

Want to be romanced for Valentine’s Day?

burbed_guest_bloggerToday is a very special day if you love romance and lovers and all that twaddle.  Our featured home was suggested by Burbed reader Tracy Tea House, who thought it was perfect for February 14th. We went along with it because we really weren’t up to finding yet another pink house for this year.  Thanks very much and please give Tracy a big, warm Real Bay Area welcome as today’s Guest Blogger!

And also some chocolate.  This stupid Hallmark Holiday does have an upside.


130213-arlington-trulia1048 Arlington Ln
San Jose, CA 95129
$1,598,000

4 bed, 3 bath
2,415 sqft
Single-Family Home
10 Days on Trulia
187 views
Status: For Sale
MLS/Source ID: NON
4 Bedrooms
3 Bathrooms
2,415 sqft
Single-Family Home
Built In 2007
Lot Size: 8,712 sqft
Zip: 95129
Neighborhood: West Valley

Beautiful Home in Top Cupertino School – Rebuilt in 2007

1048 Arlington Ln Rebuilt in 2007. 2415 SF of living space on a 7068 SF lot Hardwood flooring and recessed lighting throughout home. Fireplace in family room. Custom Cherry wood Kitchen cabinet and granite counters. All New Appliances. Master Suite with Sunken Jacuzzi Tub. Top Cupertino Schools.

130213-arlington-desk

Maybe a good house for Valentine’s Day as the Realtor is really trying hard to romance this house. Let’s go picture  by picture shall we?

Number one, bleak and dismal, focus on the stained and cracked concrete.

Number two, the desk will not fit in this small room so we will try to make you a believer by turning it diagonal.. Problem solved!

130213-arlington-doorNumber three, we are really proud of the stock door, and the paint. Pictures 3-5 are making the most of it.

Pic six, how to show the shower and tub in same photo? We wouldn’t want to waste an extra shot that could involve the commode. And, what makes the Jacuzzi sunken?

But my favorite is the last one. Like a set from a film in the San Fernando Valley. Imagine, an empty room, a bed, a bottle of wine and two glasses. And practically new remodeled 2007, and trying to get that back.

130213-arlington-xxx

Comments (11) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:07 am

January 1, 2013

A New Year, Same Old Resolutions ‘n Predictions ‘n Stuff

121231-newyear-2013Happy 2013 everyone!

We don’t have too many New Year’s Resolutions, although we invite you to let us know what they should be.  Here are some we’d probably get from the people who are thinking this but wouldn’t dare comment.

· How about being nice in that True Bay Area Spirit you never stick to, you hypocrite?

· You’re too nice to the whiners.  I liked the site better when you were 10 kinds of rude.

· How come you never do a house in my neighborhood?  There’s all kinds of crap here!

· How come you always do my neighborhood?  My neighborhood is more elegant than Cupertino!  Quit dumping on us!

· When will you get rid of Commenter XYZ?  I cannot stand XYZ!  I won’t comment here until you ban XYZ.

· Stop censoring XYZ’s posts!  XYZ is the best commenter on your stupid site.

· Please no more Guest Posts!

· Hey, you haven’t run a Guest Post in months!

· How come burbed went away?  You suck. Bring back burbed!  burbed was funny.

· Where did you go? Are you on vacation or something? This burbed poster is no good.  Why didn’t you ask Commenter XYZ to fill in for you instead?

· Enouhg wit the gramer Natsy stuf. Noboddy cars how abut my speling.

· Can you write a post in less than 200 words?  I don’t think you can.

 

Nope, and when we answered the last question this article went to 427.  Okay, now here are some of our predictions for the New Year.

  • Real estate prices will go up where it’s Special and stay flat or even drop where it isn’t.  Are you selling a house? Did you have to lower the price?  Then it isn’t Special.  Q.E.D.
  • Rents will go up some more in late Spring and Summer.  If you got yourself a rental last summer, we suggest you look into how much breaking the lease will cost you, because you could get something cheaper right now.
  • Spring Bounce officially starts today and continues until the end of December.  Look for higher asking prices… where it’s Special.
  • As long as They Aren’t Making Any More Land, Burbed will continue to have plenty of material!

Stop in on comments to wish everyone a Happy New Year, and feel free to make your predictions for 2013, or give us your advice on how to improve this site (which we promise we will ignore completely).

Comments (3) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:01 am

December 31, 2012

Last post of 2012

Today is the last day of the year.  What was your favorite property of all the ones we pointed and laughed at this year?  Here are some for your discussion.

Top High End Properties

Belvedere Design House doesn’t sell, going up for auction

Unbelvble Gorgeous French Style Masterpiece Estate in Saratoga

Lafayette Mansion of Murders

Los Gatos house parks 7

Unbelievable New Millbrae House

Burlingame Mystery House

Los Altos Hills for only $20M

Sunnyvale Freedom is Slavery Inverse House

$4.2M Belvedere teardown

Woodside auction (never sold)

Live across the street from Steve Jobs, except you can’t cuz he’s dead

Brutalist Sebastopol spread

$9M house with meh kitchen

Saratoga red arrow spectacular

Insanely expensive PA house with Kawlums in the bathroom really

Too-big-for-the-hood Sunnyvale Spectacular, with Bunus Buyer in comments

Los Gatos luxury home plus HDR lesson

New and ugly house in Mountain View!

Top Not So High End Properties

8.5 foot wide lot in Alameda

Bayview Bargain

Santa Cruz Mountain High

Saught after PA street

Every Burbed cliche in Sunnyvale

Realtard goes there: Alameda bathroom flaunts all

San Mateo Photo Spectacular

I say, I say, I say in Mountain View

Instagram for Redfin

Mountain View house with free pets

Million dollar meth lab

Dead animal decor

Redwood City or Abbottabad?

Pair of houses across from psych ward

Adorable pink house in PA under a mil

This Castro Valley house is going places

Saratoga home for living!

Truly manificent, with angry commenter defending this neighborhood’s honor

Palo Alto! But deplorable condition

This one’s worse

Kids not included with house

House with themed rooms in Fremont

Perfect home in Walnut Creek

Good housekeeping in Menlo Park

Close to Santana Row!

Top Filler Pieces Not About Actual Houses for Sale

Lucky numbers in asking prices

Snout Housing of the South Bay

Worst. Ad. Ever.

Los Gatos family scamming school district?

(November) 2012 Proposition Voters Guide

New Luxury Trend: Tons ‘o Toilets

Make more money not selling houses than selling houses

Charter school lawsuit lunacy in Los Altos school district

Business student asks us to do his homework

Palo Alto is so awesome people live in their cars and park there

Spot the Meth Lab

NAR creates utterly useless stats, Movoto derives useless infographic, we uselessly point ‘n laff

Free Tesla with non-RBA house (cheaper w/o Tesla)

The other Official Burbed Ballot Guide to Everything (June 2012 election)

Facebook effect on SF (yes, SF) real estate prices

Deconstructing the WSJ’s doubleplusgood view of the housing implosion

Squatters sue Realtard

Painter of Light Kinkade switched off

Now is the Time to Buy or Sell a House. With Us.

Spot the Grow House

San Jose House found under Hoarder’s hoard

A dozen tenants in a SAn Jose McMansion

Silicon Valley high-flying homeowners who lost everything

Under $2K fine for house thievery

Secrets of Contracting Cheap

See if our 2012 predictions came to pass

Did we leave out your favorite Burbed house or article?  Which piece was your least favorite and why?  What would you like to see us cover more of in 2013?

Comments (6) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:07 am

December 25, 2012

Merry Christmas! Here are some ornaments for your tree!

121224-xmas-agentAh, Christmas time.  The toys, the food, the eggnog, the family visits, the decorations, the lights, and of course, the tree.  We wanted to find a simple ornament with a house for sale representation to wish you all a Happy Holiday, but instead, we found the ornament at right.

Amazing, isn’t it?

Now, we will be the first to admit that there are indeed excellent and knowledgeable real estate agents out there.  This blog acknowledges that there would be fewer people buying and selling homes if all of them were completely incompetent.  But this blog more importantly notes that it’s the bottom percentiles of the “profession” that help keep us in top material.

121224-xmas-realtard-cafeNow, if you have a Special Agent who you think would appreciate these thoughts on their tree, we swear we did not make this up.  You can actually buy this round ceramic ornament at CafePress.  And it will cost you $12.50.  Plus shipping!  And you can also get it in red ink (perfect for the foreclosure specialist).

Being the inquisitive, fun-loving bunch that we are, we decided to see if this ornament could be, well, improved.  Took us a while, and since none of us went to design school, it didn’t have the panache or the braggadocio of the simple ornament above.  But ours has something better.  A logo.

A completely derivative yet 100% protected-from-trademark-infringement-lawsuits-by-the-fact-that-it’s-obviously-satirical-and-would-not-induce-confusion-in-anyone-other-than-a-Realtard logo.

We wish you and yours a very Wonderful Winter Whatever.

Comments (4) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:08 am

November 22, 2012

It’s Thanksgiving, and Here’s Your Turkey!

Happy Thanksgiving!  Sorry today’s house is late, as we were up all night prepping for a Burbed Feast.  Did you know how difficult it is to cut up the Real Bay Area into Census districts of half inch cubes without crossing any zip codes?

Now on to our entree. Today’s house was sent in by one of its former owners, a Burbed reader who wishes to remain anonymous.  Can’t imagine why!

121122-ardis-movoto361 Ardis Ave
San Jose, CA 95117 
Price:  $555,000

Loan Payment:  $1,902/mo
Bedrooms:  4
Bathrooms:  3
Size:  2,943 sqft
$/Sqft:  $188/sqft
Type:  Single Family House
Year Built:  1951
Lot Size:  9,424
Days on Movoto:  547 days
Sold Date:  05/31/11
MLS#:  81123441
Status:  Sold for $535,000

Contractors special-Huge Lot w/ Unlimited Potential. Build your Dream Home near Santana Row/Valley Fair.

121122-ardis-kitchenHere’s what our unnamed fan has to say about today’s main course:

The house that keeps on giving.. Yes I was one of the people who lost money on this West Valley Brigadoon. The person who bought it from me, never did one thing he said, just held it and turned it for my profit… This wreck has been untouched through 4 sales…

Will the next buyer be able to rehab this behemoth???

121122-ardis-tile-roomBad houses happen to good people :-0

This house was sent in just a week and a half ago, but the usually suspect real estate sites have it marked as sold already.  Either our correspondent just noticed his/her old place changed hands after almost two years on the market, or there’s a more recent listing we’re not finding.

Hey, Redfin, pass the white meat!  Click on through if you’re joining us from the front page.  The table is groaning.

(more…)

Comments (4) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 11:56 am

November 6, 2012

Election Day Special

If you haven’t already sent in your absentee ballot, today is the day for you to vote.  There’s a clutch of candidates who made speeches and some of them are going to get elected.  Burbed has not endorsed any specific candidates, but we have a guide to the state propositions based on how much each would increase the value of your house.

Now, here’s the house we’d vote for if it were on the ballot.  Thanks very much to Burbed reader MJ for nominating it!

121105-wolfe-trulia1430 South Wolfe Road
Sunnyvale CA 94087
$728,888

Bedrooms: 3
Bathrooms: 2
175 days on Trulia
33 views
Property type: Single-Family Home
Size: 1,768 sqft
Lot: Ask agent
Price/sqft: $412/sqft
Year built: 1949
MLS/ID: 81218044

REGULAR SALE, NOT A SHORT SALE!!!NOT A SHORT SALE!!! NEWLY REMODELED PROPERTY!!! 1,768 SQ FT. GRANITE COUNTER TOPS, NEW BRAZILIAN CHERRY CABINETRY, NEW CARPETING IN ALL THE BEDROOMS, MARBLE IN BATHROOMS & HALLWAY, HOUSE IS IN A GREAT LOCATION. CONVENIENT ACCESS TO HWY 280, 85 AND LAWRENCE EXPY. IN OTHER WORDS A TURNKEY HOME FOR YOUR BUYER.

121105-wolfe-stove-1Here’s MJ’s nominating speech.

I’ve read the blog for a while but never felt compelled to send anything in. Until now. I believe I found a home with every Burbed cliche. It is a crapshack. It has a sweet price history, quadrupling in price in fourteen years, eights in the listing price, garage converted to “living unit with two bedrooms and a kitchen”, awful location on a busy road (though oddly the listing copy mentions its proximity to a different busy road), seven photos of the stove, and insane listing copy noting twice it isn’t a short sale. It even has DHO, see the reflection in the patio door.

121105-wolfe-reflectionI don’t feel like I can take credit for this. The realtor really deserves it all.

Oh it gets better. My wife found out it come with Sunnyvale utilities but Santa Clara schools, four Redfin agent comments, and the first shot is a Google street view. We really have hit every Burbed cliche except pink house.

But was it a former meth lab?  Got ya there, huh?

121105-wolfe-redfinMJ sent us a link to Redfin, which was perfectly fine when we checked it out a couple of days ago, but this is what we see now.  Another Burbed cliche, the listing got pulled the day we wanted to write it up.  Fortunately it’s still on almost every other real estate site (for now), so we’re going to grab those pictures while the grabbing is good.

Whoa, how’s this for a cliche?  Search for the house by address, click on the Trulia listing, and get the wrong house in the wrong town.  We swear we’re not making this up, but the Google link to the house was sending us to 1395 Jefferson in Santa Clara.  Whew!

At least the Redfin comments are still there, even if the 24 photos were taken down.  See some of what you missed, after the break.

(more…)

Comments (9) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:04 am

October 31, 2012

Trick or treat?

121030-vollmer-pumpkinIt’s Halloween!  We’d love to hear what you’re dressed up as today, and what your kids are wearing to their Real Bay Area schools!  But first, the trick. 

Burbed reader Tracy Tea House is serving this San Jose special today, and we’ll leave it for you to unwrap.  Remember, Tracy likes Trulia for listings, so you can too.

121030-vollmer-trulia1747 Vollmer Way
San Jose CA 95116
$429,900

Reduced $20,000 on 10/12/12
Est. payment: 
Bedrooms: 4 
Bathrooms: 2 full, 2 partial 
29 days on Trulia
171 views
Property type: Single-Family Home
Size: 1,658 sqft
Lot: Ask agent
Price/sqft: $259/sqft
Year built: 1947
MLS/ID: 81236242
Neighborhood: Alum Rock, 95116

San Jose, CA – Single Family Detached
Description provided by Trulia

This Single-Family Home located at 1747 Vollmer Way, San Jose CA is currently for sale and has been listed on Trulia for 29 days. This property is listed by CENTURY 21 Alpha for $429,900. 1747 Vollmer Way has 4 beds, 4 baths, and approximately 1,658 square feet. The price per square foot is $259. The property was built in 1947. 1747 Vollmer Way is in the Alum Rock neighborhood in San Jose, CA.

121030-vollmer-roomHere’s what you get when you ring this doorbell:

Lord Voldemort’s street… This one scares me and the listing croppy is just that, strange and mystifying. Seems like, from the satellite,  there is some kind of evil carnival located on the street behind.

Listing copy?  We see no listing copy here.    Redfin says, menacingly, “There are no remarks available.”  Maybe Lord Voldemort… disposed of it… along with 121030-vollmer-kitchen-redfinthe lot size the agent won’t disclose online. Hint: 6477 sf per Redfin. They also have three completely different photos, including this kitchen as classic “before” snap, and a yard perfect for burying mistakes.

Now here’s a treat: pictures inside the house from three years ago.  Plus an even older listing (nine years! for $388K! with overbidding!), no photos but actual description:

MOTIVATED SELLERS HAVE ALREADY FOUND REPLACEMENT HOME AND READY TO MAKE A DEAL NEW ROOF HAS BEEN DONE WITH GUTTERS * * * TILE KITCHEN, FRENCH DOORS TO BACKYARD CENTRALLY LOCATED TO FREEWAYS AND SHOPPING * * GARAGE CONV. PERMITS UNKNOWN

Like Dr. Frankenstein, we’re digging up pieces all over the place to assemble this monster.  Movoto cached the recent listing description!

121030-vollmer-movotoPrice:  $429,900
Loan Payment:  $1,497/mo
Bedrooms:  4
Bathrooms:  3
Size:  1,658 sqft
$/Sqft:  $259/sqft
Type:  Single Family House
Year Built:  1947
Lot Size:  6,477
Days on Movoto:  26 days
Neighborhood:  Alum Rock
MLS#:  81236242
Status:  Pending – Do Not Show

This is a very large home at a reasonable price. Look no further for these one`s in a life time opportunity home. Close to all convenience for your benefit.

121030-vollmer-satellite

That does sound creepy.  Have a look at the carnival and Happy Halloween!

Comments (9) -- Posted by: madhaus @ 5:03 am