Welcome back to another week of Extreme Housing Win, Bay Area Edition!  We hope everyone had a wonderful holiday break and we wish you all a Very Happy New Year if you haven’t been reading us Every Single Day Like You Should Be.

Today’s featured FUBAR hails from the linchpin of higher learning in all of California.  No, not Stanford.  Thanks very much to Burbed reader Ms. Snoopy for this bodacious buildout of BOOM in Berzerkely!

1068 CRAGMONT Ave
Berkeley, CA 94708
$399,000

4 Beds 
3 Baths 
2,129 Sq. Ft.
$187 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1959 
Lot Size: 8,100 Sq. Ft. 
On Redfin: 20 days
Status: Active
Type: Detached
Stories: 2
Community: Berkeley Hills
MLS#: 40598550
Style: Craftsman
View: Bay
County: Alameda

If You Love Natural Light, You will Fall in Love w/ the “VIEWS” of this home. This is definitely a HOME IMPROVEMENT house in the workings! NEEDS a lot of TLC.

Here’s Ms. Snoopy’s nominating speech for this front-page folly:

According to the agent, this one “NEEDS a lot of TLC.” I guess “TLC” in realtard speak now means drywall, doors, and ceilings. But the agent is right that you will get “lots of natural light” due to the fact that there are no walls.

Love your site!

No walls?  That means plenty of fresh air as well!  Plus fresh water.

And plenty of nature, both animal and plant kingdoms, free to surprise you day or night.

Would you look at those VIEWS!!!!!

It’s Friday!  Time to start planning your weekend adventure, and Burbed reader Tom Paine gives us a getaway pad in Guerneville!  Thanks very much for this hair-raising habitat!

11175 HWY 116 DR
GUERNEVILLE, CA 95446
$349,950 Price Change

2 Bed 
1 Bath 
1,480 SqFt 
Single Family Home
MLS# 21226926 
Active
Original Price:  $399,950
Price Change: 12.50%
Listing Type:  Residential
Style: Cabin
County: Sonoma
Bedrooms: 2
Total Baths: 1
Full Baths: 1
Garage: 2 spaces
Year Built: 1921
Listed: 12/04/12
Location
County: Sonoma
City: Guerneville
Cross Street: Mays Canyon Rd

Description
Custom cabin in the woods, 4.2 acres, two bedroom, one bath, big basement, year round spring, surrounded by fur and redwood trees, three fireplaces.

This property, alas, is no longer for sale and went Pending/Do Not Show a couple weeks ago.  But this was really because everyone had to see those fur trees and now they’re endangered. That also must explain why they dare not include a photo, and in that case our link is to a cached search result because we weren’t finding this fox anywhere.  They also don’t show the house because the walls must be mink-lined.

Fortunately, we found this actual listing photo under a rock or in someone’s raccoon trenchcoat or it fell off a truck or something.  Don’t ask how we get results, just enjoy them.  And imagine year round spring and the cuddliest trees ever. 

And for your Web 3.0 business out in the woods?  We’re thinking chinch ranch.  (It’s at 9:20)

And happy new year to all our Burbed readers!  Let’s get right back to housing win, shall we?  We shall.  Today’s fine featured facade was nominated by Burbed reader Michael Boltonestater.

917 North Rd
Belmont, CA 94002
$499,888

3 bed
2 bath
1,490 sqft
Single-Family Home
 
Listing Details
18 Days on Trulia
586 views
Provided by: Liberty Realty Via Mlslistings
Broker: Liberty Realty
Listing Agent: Patrick Sullivan

One original owners–built 1948—-more room than you could imagine–Third bedroom may non-conforming—-nice redwood tree in the back plus lot’s nice vegitation.Chandlier in bedroom is not included.

How hot is the Peninsula housing market?  It is so hot that this fine property, despite the unincluded Chandlier, went pending on New Year’s Day.  And that forced us to use Trulia instead of Redfin.

It is so hot that the agent responsible for this listing didn’t even bother taking an actual photo of the house and just slammed in a Streetview shot (trash bins included!).  Here’s proof at left if you don’t believe me, unless the one original owners have a very interesting outdoor light fixture.

And this market is so hot that a home could be described as “more room than you could imagine” and then force you to imagine it.  That’s right, no inside pix! 

It is so hot that not even the lovely view from the front yard could distract all the overbidders.

Yes, this market is so hot, this place went pending in 18 days.  2013 had better be the year you resolve to not get PRICED OUT FOREVER!!!!!!!!

Our post-Christmas closeouts continue!  Today we’re heading up the hill to Santa Cruz County to show that you, yes YOU!! Can!! Afford!! To buy a house!! Thanks very much to Burbed reader wahnny for sending us this bodacious Boulder Creek craptacular.

273 W HILTON Dr
San Lorenzo Valley, CA 95006
$49,900

3 Beds 
2 Baths 
1,400 Sq. Ft.
$36 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1965 
Lot Size: 0.32 Acres 
On Redfin: 21 days
Status: Active
Property Type: Detached Single Family
Community: Boulder Creek
MLS#: 81242647
Stories: 2
County: Santa Cruz

Property damaged by 2006 slide on Boulder Creek golf course. Engineering reports and county reports on file. Drive by only. DO NOT ENTER PROPERTY. CASH OFFER ONLY.

Here’s what wahnny said about this resort location:

Although the photos and listing appear to match the reality of the area (made worse with recent rains), the dreaming still continues.

You’ll be having pleasant dreams in this Golf Course abode!  They’ll be so amazing that’s why you’re only allowed to drive by. 

Nobody’s allowed to enter the property until you’ve paid your cash offer.  If that isn’t proof that The Bubbles Are Back, we don’t know what is.

We’re sure you can clean up that 2006 slide on Boulder Creek golf course, if you can find where the engineering and county reports are “on file.”

Let’s continue with our post-Christmas clearance sales!  Today’s fabulous find is in the fantastic framework of Milpitas, or as its fun-loving denizens call it, “What’s that smell?”  Thanks very much to Burbed reader Petsmart Groomer for flipping this one forward.

1568 CLEAR LAKE Ave
Milpitas, CA 95035
$359,000

HOA Dues: $270/mo. 
2 Beds 
1.5 Baths 
1,008 Sq. Ft.
$356 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1971 
Lot Size: 810 Sq. Ft. 
On Redfin: 21 days
Status: Active
HOA Dues: $270/month
Stories: 1-3 (Low Rise)
County: Santa Clara
Property Type: Townhouse
Community: Milpitas
MLS#: 81242591

Property well maintained and is ready for its new owners.

Or as PG notes:

It’s ready for a new agent too.

Oh don’t be such a stickler, Petsmart.  Just because the front image took a little rotation ride doesn’t mean the agent isn’t a knowledgeable professional.  Let’s enjoy the rest of the photos.

Excellent.  Start with the exterior shots first and then lure your customers in.

Here the agent skillfully picks up the wooden texture of the bed frame in both the dining room set and the beautifully shining hardwood floor.

Contextual linking continues in subtle ways with the kitchen towels suggesting whimsy, supported by the colorful devil-may-care display on the coffee table.

Now it’s your turn.  Do you see the ingenious way the agent finds elements in common from the living room entry to the bathroom sink?  And nice job leaving out the throne entirely. You’d be surprised how many amateurs not only include it but have the seat raised high.

Ending the photo show with nature at her most bountiful, we also note this property has a location, location, location (!) in a popularly-populated planning potpourri!  You can find everything here!

We hope you had a wonderful winter whatever and got all the toys you asked for.  But just in case you didn’t, we have some close-out specials for the end of the year!  Today, Burbed reader J from Alameda has some Island High Style for you.

828 LINCOLN Ave
Alameda, CA 94501
$249,000

1 Beds
1 Baths
561 Sq. Ft.
$444 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1959
Lot Size: 1,275 Sq. Ft.
On Redfin: 76 days
Status: Active
Type: Detached
Stories: 1
County: Alameda
Style: Cottage
Community: Alameda
MLS#: 40592515

MOST UNIQUE NARROW BLDG. 150 FEET DEEP, FENCED IN LOT, BACKYARD PATIO, RESIDENTIAL (NEW ZONING R-4 RESIDENTIAL) POSSIBLE ART STUDIO PLUS GALLERY, LIVING IN AND WORK ON COMPUTERS, ANOTHER POSSIBILITY, SO MANY POSSIBILITIES OF HOME OFFICES. CLOSE TO BUS AND ALL TRANSPORTATION AND NEAR WEBSTER STREET.

Here’s why J thought we’d be interested in this offering:

My Alameda black Friday nomination. Do not be fooled by first photo – its the narrow yellow building to the right. On a very busy street, not a great part of town. That maybe, just maybe, can be zoned commercial.

Happy Shopping!

Wait, Black Friday was last month…. oh, this was sent in last month.  That says we can’t possibly be in the RBA, because it’s still on the market!  So hurry before it isn’t!

And if you have any doubts that this listing is “MOST UNIQUE” at least the lot itself is.

Bunus: the broker has the same name as a famous television personality.  Double Bunus: also the same name as a VP at Alain Pinel, Saratoga, just to really confuse the customers.  (Plus 3 more real estate agents in California alone.)

While you’re busy getting your last-minute Christmas shopping and decoration and cooking done, think about celebrating the holiday with your extended family. Now think about what it means to turn home, hearth, family, and grandparents into that All-American concept of… making a buck off it.  Thanks very much to Burbed reader J.C. for showing us what the true spirit of the holidays is about.

631 DUNHOLME Way
Sunnyvale, CA 94087
$1,395,000

6 Beds 
4 Baths 
2,852 Sq. Ft.
$489 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1976 
Lot Size: 10,176 Sq. Ft. 
On Redfin: 65 days
Status: Active
Property Type: Detached Single Family
Stories: 1
Community: Sunnyvale
MLS#: 81238349
Style: Traditional
View: Neighborhood
County: Santa Clara

Great opportunity for business , Clean private residence, elderly care facility , fully furnish, with pool.

Here’s what J.C. thought when sending us this listing:

Complete with pictures of elderly residents that come with the home!

A perfect purchase to ensure you won’t be lonely this Christmas!  Or New Years!

We may or may not be taking tomorrow off, but we’ll have some year-end closeout sales waiting when we return. 

If we return.  Because we could have been reading those stone disks all wrong and the world could end this week.

It’s time for another expedition a little further from the usual Google-Facebook-Twitter locations, locations, locations.  Today’s featured frontage is a full-on flip, thanks to Burbed reader dollarbin!

203 SUNNYHILLS Dr
Watsonville, CA 95076
$319,000

3 Beds 
2 Baths 
1,380 Sq. Ft.
$231 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1954 
Lot Size: 5,227 Sq. Ft. 
On Redfin: 21 days
Status: Pending With Release
Property Type: Detached Single Family
Stories: 1
Community: Watsonville
MLS#: 81241943
Style: Contemporary
View: Neighborhood
County: Santa Cruz

Freshly Remodeled 3 bedroom 2 bath Eichler home at the end of a cul de sac. Short walking distance to schools in nice stable neighborhood. new roof, all new plumbing, upgraded electrical service, wiring and light fixtures, new heater, and water heater upgraded kitchen with granite counter tops and stainless appliances. all double paned windows

Granite and stainless and panes, oh my!  And dollarbin has another reason to send in this listing.  Let’s listen in.

I was checking out the listing for this Watsonville flat-top.  Looking at the listing I noticed that it sold back in April for roughly half the price.  Fortunately, the old listing also has interior photos.

Shame they had to paint over all of that original artwork.

Wait, old listing?

203 SUNNYHILLS Dr
Watsonville, CA 95076
Sold for $160,000

2 Beds 
1 Baths  1,470 Sq. Ft.
$109 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1954 
Lot Size: 5,227 Sq. Ft. 
Sold On: Apr 26, 2012
Status: Sold
Property Type: Detached Single Family
Stories: 1
Community: Watsonville
MLS#: 81200844
Style: Cottage/Bungalow
View: Neighborhood
County: Santa Cruz

Subject located on corner lot at end of road. Large backyard patio area. Centrally located near all amenities. Interior of home is vandalized and will require much TLC. Good opportunity for a contractor/investor fixer.

Let’s enjoy that original artwork, then.

And best of all, these pictures are actual size.  So for once you don’t have to go to the listing to embiggen them.

But the photo of the living room above is the only picture that we can tell for sure was taken in the same house.  See if you can identify some of the others!

And note the good wishes the artist left for the future homeowners.  It’s in red so you can’t miss it.  SUCCESS.

Today’s fine featured facade is brought to you by Burbed reader Petsmart Groomer!  Thanks very much, and if you want to see your name up in lights on the front page like PG’s, send your richest realty wrecks to one of the emails on the rightside column.

396 BARTLETT Ave
Sunnyvale, CA 94086
$699,000

3 Beds 
2 Baths 
1,765 Sq. Ft.
$396 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1942 
Lot Size: 5,100 Sq. Ft. 
On Redfin: 70 days
Status: Active
Property Type: Detached Single Family
Stories: 1
Community: Sunnyvale
MLS#: 81237245
Style: Traditional
View: Neighborhood
County: Santa Clara

Absolutely a gorgeous home, completely rebuilt from the ground up in 2007. Oak kitchen cabinets granite counter tops. Hardwood floors in living room. Plus much more. Property will be open on Saturday, October 27 2012 from 12:00 to 4:00 p. m. Please show at that time.

Oak, granite, hardwood…. wait, wait, something’s missing.  Shoot, I bet the agent had the flip trifecta in the listing copy all along, and another joker figured he could just steel it and stain a reputation.

PG’s observation on this property:

Absolutely a gorgeous home… Yet there is only one picture.

Plus much more.

You want to know how much more?  You see that big corporate campus behind the back fence?  It just got sold to a real estate investment partnership.

Yes.  That means you could lease some of the space and then your commute to work would literally be seconds.  All you’d have to do is build a gate through your back fence.  You’d have a shorter commute than Mark Zuckerberg did back when he had a rental a block from the old Facebook HQ, and soon you’ll have a smaller number than he does (#36) on the Forbes 400!

How are you going to do that? Dunno, but Sunnyvale’s about to lose 1100 jobs.  Get cracking!

Bunus: Also just seconds away: expressway and high-voltage transmission lines! Is this house great or what? Plus much more.  Like the central location conveniently nestled between several Super Fun sites.

Property will be open on Saturday, October 27th 2012.

Having trouble getting going this morning? Today’s featured home, brought to you by Burbed reader Tracy Tea House, will get you going.  You’ll really be excited when you see you can’t have it anymore.

1015 S Genevieve Ln
San Jose, CA 95128
Sold: $650,000
Listed:  $579,000

Loan Payment:  $1,953/mo
Bedrooms:  3
Bathrooms:  2
Size:  1,357 sqft
$/Sqft:  $426/sqft
Type:  Single Family House
Year Built:  1955
Lot Size:  8,400
Days on Movoto:  34 days
Sold Date:  11/19/12
MLS#:  81240587
Status:  Sold for $650,000

Custom Home in a very desirable neighborhood! Nice floor plan with eat-in kitchen & living room/dining room combination. Living room with wood-burning fireplace, large windows & sliding glass door! Gleaming hardwood floors! New interior paint! Some plantation shutters! Ceiling fan! Indoor laundry! Original kitchen & baths. Large covered patio! Large lot with a very spacious back yard! Fruit trees!

Here’s why Tracy sent this one in:

I liked that house it was so WTF!

This one might not be worthy… But I wonder if the amount of !!!! will be enough to push it over the edge… This actually is my type of flipper potential. I like the house and location… and there are , some, plantation shutters!

What’s worthy is that it sold for more than 10% over asking! So WTF, is the 28 the Next Mountain View?

Not just hardwood floors, but gleaming hardwood floors. No, not just gleaming hardwood floors, but gleaming hardwood floors! Also, original vintage kitchen from 1955.  Why that doesn’t have an exclamation point (like almost everything else in the listing) is a real surprise. We mean a real surprise! Fruit trees! Ceiling fan! Some plantation shutters!