It’s been far too long since we’ve checked in with Burbed reader Tom Paine.  Tom’s found us a new manse in Northern Marin!  Thanks!

188 Caribe Isle
Novato, CA 94949
$450,000

SHORT SALE
1 Story Detached
0 bedroom
– bathrooms
Finished Sq Ft: 1,824 sq ft
Lot Size: 0.22 acres
Year Built: 1964
48 years old
Type: 1 Story Detached
Style: Contemporary
Taxes: —
Subdivision: Novato
Stories: 1
1 PhotoPlay Video
Listed For Sale: 9/13/12
6 Days
$450,000
MLS #21221815

Here’s what Tom had to say when sending us this listing:

No bedrooms.  Nope, no bedrooms. Must be located between two starbucks.

Actually, we think it’s located in a foldspace anomoly, since there’s another house that’s not for sale at the same address, with a positive number of actual BRs and BAs.  We hope the higher dimensional attributes that allow these two homes to exist in superposition are included with the lot, or you’ll need to bring Erwin Schrödinger to help collapse the wave-form at your closing.

188 Caribe Isle
Novato, CA 94949
$882,000 Last Sold Price

3 Beds
2 Baths
1,824 Sq. Ft.
$484 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1964
Lot Size: 9,600
Sq. Ft.
Sold On: Jul 23, 2007
Status: Sold
Source: Public Records

No Property Details Available

Sorry, but Redfin currently has no details for this property.

No Agent Insights on This Home

We haven’t left any notes about this home yet, but as soon as we do, we’ll leave our thoughts here.

Sheesh.  Maybe Sawbuck can’t prove there are any bedrooms or bathrooms in this house, but they auto-generate these really thorough videos!  We’re disappointed that the narrator, using the Sawbuck info above, didn’t mention “no bedrooms.”  Or to be more exact, zero.

Bet you’ll never think about the northern Marin city of Novato in the same way after you read this.  Thanks very much to Burbed reader nomadic for this noteworthy news item from the North Bay!

Picasso lithograph stolen from Novato mansion recovered

KTVU.com and Wires, Monday June 11th, 2012

NOVATO, Calif. — A Pablo Picasso lithograph worth $30,000 that was stolen from a Novato mansion owned by former Ukrainian Prime Minister Pavlo Lazarenko was recovered Sunday morning, a Novato police sergeant said.

The framed lithograph, titled "Femme au Chignon," was found around 8:20 a.m. propped against a fence along a curb on Burning Tree Drive by neighbors who were driving to a hiking trail, Sgt. Jennifer Welch said.

"It was placed there to be found," Welch said.

The lithograph is believed to have been taken from the furnished but unoccupied residence at 100 Obertz Lane that is owned by Lazarenko, who was serving time in a federal prison in Los Angeles for conspiracy and money laundering.

What a great story!  Stolen art, a foreigner with suitcases full of cash, and he’s in jail for not doing a better job hiding the suitcases.  Out of control teenfest!  But most important: Show-off mansion!

Holy crap, this HOUSE has almost a half acre of living space!  The tag “ginormous” we use for homes over five thousand square feet simply doesn’t do this one justice.  And while Redfin thinks you want the lot size in square feet, Zillow has the sense to translate it into acres: 11.21 of them.

ZEstimate: $5,052,500.  Rent ZEstimate: $7,045 a month.  That’s a little more house than you can get for that amount in Palo Alto.

Just how many suitcases did the former prime minister have with him?  It better have been worth the nine years in prison.