Today’s featured property was sent in by Burbed reader Swan.  Thanks very much for this big, big, big listing with the small, small, small number of photos.

 

16450 AZTEC RIDGE Dr, Los Gatos, CA 95030
$19,995,000

BEDS: 6
BATHS: 8
SQ. FT.: 11,257
$/SQ. FT.: $1,776
LOT SIZE: 50 Acres
PROPERTY TYPE: Detached Single Family
STYLE: Contemporary
STORIES: Tri-Level
VIEW: Bay, Mountains, Neighborhood, Valley, City Lights
YEAR BUILT: 1991
COMMUNITY: Los Gatos/Monte Sereno
COUNTY: Santa Clara
MLS#: 81137011
SOURCE: MLSListings
STATUS: Active
ON REDFIN: 45 days

Spectacular one of a kind property situated on approx 50 acres in one of the most unique settings in the World! Birds-eye views encompassing the entire Silicon Valley from downtown San Jose all the way to San Francisco. Modern architecture of approx 20 years old with amazing ceiling heights and open floor plan with sep guest house of over 2000 sq ft. Private and gated at end of quiet cul-de-sac.

Here’s what Swan had to say about this listing:

Here’s a $20 million property with only one picture.  Today’s blog made me think of this house.  A contrast between $200K in Gilroy with nine of the exact same pictures and a $20 million property with only one picture.

A contrast all right, and don’t forget this place in San Francisco with 23 pictures at about 1/70th the price.

Clearly this listing is an intelligence test.  Most average tech workers could find an address on the MLS, or at least on a site like Redfin or Trulia.  But can you find this house’s Special Secret Private Website?  Hint: there are no hints on MLS.

Click on through to have a look at the pictures the agent doesn’t feel you deserve to see, but first, see if you can find the website yourself.

(more…)

Today’s Guest Blog is a feature by Burbed reader Divasm!  Thanks very much for this passionate post complete with onsite photos in the location, location, location setting of Millbrae.  So close to the airport, so convenient to international travel, and just minutes from SFO!

Remember, we love guest columns at Burbed (less work for us!) so if you have a listing you want to do justice to, you too can be on the front page!  Our contact info is at the top of the right column.

Waaaaaaay over here ————————————————————————————————————————->

And now, stop your typing and mousing and put your hands together for Divasm!

 

987 VISTA GRANDE Ave, Millbrae, CA 94030
$849,950

BEDS: 4
BATHS: 3
SQ. FT.: 2,080
$/SQ. FT.: $409
LOT SIZE: 7,200 Sq. Ft.
PROPERTY TYPE: Detached Single Family
STYLE: Traditional
STORIES: 2
VIEW: Neighborhood
YEAR BUILT: 1953
COMMUNITY: Highlands
COUNTY: San Mateo
MLS#: 81139349
SOURCE: MLSListings
STATUS: Active
ON REDFIN: 26 days

Large 4 Br, 3 Bth home with spacious family room with full bar, on large lot. Kitchen has been updated, as have all 3 bathrooms. New carpets and painted interior. Green belt view from large picture windows in living room. Large attached 2 car garage with a large side room used as a work shop, and another side room for storage.

Dear Millbrae,

After last weekend’s round of open houses, we need to talk. Your proximity to San Francisco, your highly-scoring schools, all made you seem so attractive on the surface. You’re not as stuffy or pricey as Burlingame, not as ghetto as South San Francisco, not as housing tract-y as Daly City, and there’s no major gas pipeline activity (well, no more than normal). Perfect, right?

WRONG. I’ve tried and tried to make this work! I’ve been to open houses so close you can hear 280, and so near to El Camino you can smell the fast food. Houses priced comparably low because they’re right next to Capuchino High School (yet your kids go to Mills, because Capuchino is the low-scoring San Bruno school), and houses priced absurdly high for being on a major street…but oh wait, it’s Trousdale.

This last one on Vista Grande wasn’t a spectacular failure, it was just another stupidly priced for it’s bad layout house. But somehow I can’t take it anymore. WHY are you charging $849,950 (was $849,000 but they upped it that 950…why not 888, I ask?) for a house that looks like every house in Daly City on the outside? On a street that is super narrow with a view of the airport?

And what is with that Winchester mystery house stairway leading to a brick wall at the bottom with a metal plate that opens to a cubby in the wall? And then, the piece to resistance, off that stairway, that wood-paneled, linoleum-tiled, rock-lined disaster of a room…what IS that? From one side it looks like someone’s sick idea of a dojo, then we see the bar and sports on the TV and think somebody’s trying to open a club in their basement…WTF is THAT, Millbrae, huh???

Regardless, I didn’t stick around to check out the power lines over the steep backyard or compete with the many buyers on cell phones to foreign investors, I simply threw up my hands and left. For good this time, Millbrae, I mean it.

Today’s listing was sent in by Burbed reader Britt, who suspects that something is missing from this Mountain View house.  I don’t know why all the fuss, it’s in the same zip code as Google. That ought to be enough reason to make an offer and do a Search for whatever you can’t Find.

 

2419 TAMALPAIS St, Mountain View, CA 94043
$689,000

BEDS: 3
BATHS: 2
SQ. FT.: 1,104
$/SQ. FT.: $624
LOT SIZE: 5,520 Sq. Ft.
PROPERTY TYPE: Detached Single Family
STYLE: Contemporary
STORIES: 1
VIEW: Neighborhood
YEAR BUILT: 1955
COMMUNITY: Thompson
COUNTY: Santa Clara
MLS#: 81138652
SOURCE: MLSListings
STATUS: Active
ON REDFIN: 25 days

Just back on the market. Great value in Mountain View! 3 bedroom, 2 bath home in outstanding Monta Loma neighborhood. Huge windows give abundant natural light. Beautiful newly refinished hardwood floors plus new paint inside & out. Vaulted ceilings. Flexible floorplan with living/dining combo and country-style family room kitchen. Attached one car garage. Approx. 1,104 sq ft of living space.

Here’s what Britt has to say about this home:

Am I missing something?  The kitchen seems incomplete. Where’s the refrigerator? The stove? Maybe it’s a Manhattan-style kitchen and they’re hidden behind the cabinets so everything looks streamlined? In any event, I don’t get it.

Yes, they did an excellent job of hiding the appliances by taking 14 pictures of the living room and family room and just two of the kitchen.  But so what?

If you worked at Google they give you free food anyway.  It’s not like you would actually waste what little free time you’ll have COOKING when there’s good, hot, free food as long as you’re at work.

In fact, you should probably pay extra for that flexible floorplan.  No refrigerator or stove means more room for your monitors and game consoles.

Thanks very much to Burbed reader AstroWallaby for this absolutely amazing listing from the garlic fields of Gilroy!  Remember, drive a little, save a lot!

 

7256 CHURCH St, Gilroy, CA 95020
$430,000

 

BEDS: 5
BATHS: 2
SQ. FT.: 2,193
$/SQ. FT.: $196
LOT SIZE: 9,800 Sq. Ft.
PROPERTY TYPE: Detached Single Family
STYLE: Victorian
STORIES: 2
YEAR BUILT: 1900
COMMUNITY: Morgan Hill/Gilroy/San Martin
COUNTY: Santa Clara
MLS#: 81139389
SOURCE: MLSListings
STATUS: Active
ON REDFIN: 9 days

Two homes for the price of one(almost). Large two story home with 5 bedrooms and 2 baths. 2nd home was built in 2006 has modern amenities and has ally access. There is some work to be done, but this is the definition of sweat equity.

Here’s what AstroWallaby had to say about this property:

Oooh, as an aside, check out this nearby neighbor of the Gilroy house:

In particular, the aerial view. Take a nice old Victorian on a reasonably roomy lot, maybe spruce it up a bit… and then fill the entire backyard with another house. Brilliant! That’s down-south country-style livin’ for you.

Let’s have a look, then.

Wow.  Just, wow.  If only San Jose were as forward-looking as Gilroy and did away with that silly zoning code.  Not only would we have in-law units in our back-yards, we’d have apartment houses in our back yards.  Ka-ching!

But this is not the definition of sweat equity.  This is the definition of “previous owner ran out of borrowed money.”  Maybe the agent meant “the banker is breaking into a sweat over what happened to all its equity.”

Thanks very much to Burbed reader Ek for this find in the beautiful Blossom Valley area of San Jose.  This is the friendliest neighborhood you could live in, and today you’ll find out why.

 

3821 VILLA GLEN Way, San Jose, CA 95136
$665,000

BEDS: 4
BATHS: 2
SQ. FT.: 1,612
$/SQ. FT.: $413
LOT SIZE: 7,200 Sq. Ft.
PROPERTY TYPE: Detached Single Family
STYLE: Ranch
STORIES: 1
VIEW: Neighborhood
YEAR BUILT: 1968
COMMUNITY: Blossom Valley
COUNTY: Santa Clara
MLS#: 81140137
SOURCE: MLSListings
STATUS: Active
ON REDFIN: 11 days

OH Sat/Sun 2-4 Wonderful updated floor plan in great “Thousand Oaks Neighborhood” * Open floor plan * hardwood floors * crown molding * granite counters * plantation shutters * extensive use of pavers * outstanding backyard oasis with custom covered patio, palm trees and pebble tec pool * Close to park and schools * This one is a must see.

Looking this listing over, I didn’t see that much wrong with it.  Admittedly the décor’s a little out of fashion (okay, a LOT) and the agent could have done a better job with the photos.

Dim dining rooms, more granite than kitchen, and a sky that shrieks “This was shopped!” are mildly interesting, but not worthy of front-page status on Burbed.  But “this one is definitely a must see,” yet I’m not talking about the house.  Here’s why Ek sent this listing in:

Zoom up on the Google Street view….the owner is communicating to you.

Google Street View?  Coming right up!

Now, let’s zoom in…

We’re Number One!  We’re Number One!!!!

Here’s another fine listing from Burbed reader Petsmart Groomer, who appreciates this agent’s honesty in listing copy.

 

2362 LAURA Ln, Mountain View, CA 94043
$634,950

BEDS: 3
BATHS: 2
SQ. FT.: 1,104
$/SQ. FT.: $575
LOT SIZE: 5,000 Sq. Ft.
PROPERTY TYPE: Detached Single Family
STORIES: 1
YEAR BUILT: 1955
COMMUNITY: Thompson
COUNTY: Santa Clara
MLS#: 81138357
SOURCE: MLSListings
STATUS: Active
ON REDFIN: 4 days

Fixer-upper – situated in a pleasant setting on a tree shaded cul-de-sac lot. Improvements in progress. Fully functional, but desperate for a kitchen makeover, and a remodeled master bath.

Is the house desperate for both a kitchen makeover and a remodeled master bath?  Is it desperate for a kitchen makeover, and it HAS a remodeled master bath?  How desperate are you?  How desperate is the agent to sell this place, when he only gave us three photos to help make up our minds?

As to the existing kitchen: WOW.  Colors that POP and appliances that STAND OUT.  I swear, I’ve seen appliances on porches in Kentucky that are more up to date than this range.

Maybe the agent isn’t being as honest as Petsmart Groomer suggests.  Maybe just as when an agent says “up to date” and you observe a kitchen with the latest 1974 fixtures, when this agent says “desperate” he really meant “If you don’t rebuild it the split second you remove the contingencies, someone’s toddler will sneeze on these single-pane windows and the whole house will pancake.”

Mmmm, pancakes!  Better makeover the kitchen if you want some!

Meanwhile, I’m hoping this agent takes more photos of the house.  A few more of them should help hold the house together.  They’d have to be stronger than those windows.

Here’s another amazing find by Burbed reader SEA for you today.  Thanks very much for letting us know that not all is style and charm in our favorite city.  There’s also value!

 

455 GRANT Ave #12, Palo Alto, CA 94306
$525,000

BEDS: 2
BATHS: 2
SQ. FT.: 906
$/SQ. FT.: $579
LOT SIZE: 943 Sq. Ft.
PROPERTY TYPE: Condominium
STORIES: 1-3 (Low Rise)
YEAR BUILT: 1962
COMMUNITY: College
COUNTY: Santa Clara
MLS#: 81136262
SOURCE: MLSListings
STATUS: Active
ON REDFIN: 33 days

Open 8/20 8/21 2nd floor overlooking sparkling pool Huge36ftx6ft Patio Balcony Granite kitchen, granite floor, Brand new bathrooms, Loads of light, Excellent Palo Alto School District, Vacant, Close to CalTrain, El Camino California Ave. Walk to Stanford. Very bright unit with Atrium on one side and pool on the other side.

Here’s what SEA has to say about this, um, well-situated find.

At first I thought it was some sort of prison, but then I realized that it was ‘not a lot of money’ more than not a lot of money.

Prison? Don’t be ridiculous.  This is a highly secure storehouse for your hard-earned savings!  Just look at all these different places you could keep them in while they multiply, and all you have to do is live here.

Now check out how much the previous owners were all able to accomplish in putting their money to work:

See? These transactions are Special, just like you’ll be when you take advantage of this amazing offer to “Walk to Stanford.” It’s a beautiful 1.6 mile walk to Memorial Hall, on the Road of Kings, even! If I were you, I’d get walking to that agent’s office right now.

Here’s another East San Jose treasure thanks to Burbed reader Tracy!  Sure it’s an overpriced crapbox waiting to pull anyone who grabs it deep underwater.  Yes, there’s some amusing mistakes in the listing copy.  But it’s so much more than that!

 

10759 HUBBARD Way, San Jose, CA 95127
$399,000

BEDS: 4
BATHS: 2
SQ. FT.: 1,786
$/SQ. FT.: $223
LOT SIZE: 10,450 Sq. Ft.
PROPERTY TYPE: Detached Single Family
STYLE: Traditional
STORIES: 2
YEAR BUILT: 1974
COMMUNITY: Alum Rock
COUNTY: Santa Clara
MLS#: 81138824
SOURCE: MLSListings
STATUS: Active
ON REDFIN: 6 days

Fantastic opportuniy to make this house your dream home! Private balcony off master bedroom. HUGE bonus room opens to the ovesized deck with views of San Jose – great for entertaining. The sloped lot is tiered and waiting for your choice of landscaping! Mature trees provide a sense of privacy, yet your just minutes away from Shopping, dining, schools & freeways. So much space for so little money.

Here’s what Tracy had to say about this property:

I enjoyed the POV of the agent, focused on the bottom ¾ of the house. Also the great artistic Cypress tree shot. The wood floors do look amazing…The rest, not so much!

Whoa, does this agent have a sixty pound lens on that camera or something?  This is indeed a very bottom-heavy view of a property.

Let’s have a look at some more of the pictures.  Sometimes taking a new perspective brings out the hidden qualities of a place.

This agent is a clearly misunderstood artist, the inverse of Edgar Martins.  None of these images was manipulated, because none of them needed to be.  They made their statement without any extra help.

And that statement is: If you want to buy this house, then watch your step carefully.  Very, very carefully.

Howdy, Guest Editor sonarrat here for a record-breaking second listing in the same month! Well, I grew up in the South County area, and I still have a soft spot for that sleepy, oft-forgotten area between the IBM exit on Bailey Ave and the shortcut to I-5. As I drive on the gently winding road through the dead, lifeless and empty Coyote Valley or take the even less scenic route along the deserted Monterey Highway by the town of Coyote (pop. 121), I can’t help but feel like I’m coming home. It’s that warm and fuzzy feeling that you can’t explain, especially to anyone who grew up anywhere else. If you’re coming to shop, though, like a lot of people, you want to keep going past the Harley-Davidson dealership in Morgan Hill and make a beeline for sunny Gilroy, the self-proclaimed “Garlic Capitol of the World.”

 

355 W 8th St, Gilroy, CA 95020
$275,000

 

BEDS: 3
BATHS: 1
SQ. FT.: 1,957
$/SQ. FT.: $141
LOT SIZE: 10,000 square feet
PROPERTY TYPE: Detached Single Family
STORIES: 1
YEAR BUILT: 1920
COMMUNITY: Morgan Hill/San Martin/Gilroy
COUNTY: Santa Clara
MLS#: 81120758
SOURCE: MLSListings
STATUS: Active
ON REDFIN: 126 days

Short Sale AS-IS Zoned R3!! Plans approved for a Duplex. LARGE LOT 10,000 SQ!! Developers Dream Large Lot and Lots of Potential!! Converted Garage!! DO NOT DISTURB TENANTS!!! POTENTIAL!!! LARGE LOT 10K Plans for two homes. LOT HAS R-3 ZONING!!! SHORT SALE Will need approval from Lender on SHORT SALE AS-IS ZONING R3 R3 R3 R3 Please DO NOT DISTURB OCCUPANTS!!! Lots of POTENTIAL!!!!!!!

OMFG!!!!! So, um, what we have here is clearly a very excitable realtor. But the listing bears closer inspection. After all, during your interminable drive down here, you will see a sign that reminds you of why you made the trek.

Yes sir, you drive a little and save a lot in Gilroy. That’s why, for the price of this lovely updated condo in a convenient San Jose neighborhood with high-rated schools, you can have a scraper in a blighted neighborhood, the main selling point of which is that you have the possibility of casting it off the face of the Earth and starting over again from scratch. Not, mind you, that anyone is questioning the value in Gilroy. This is a lot of house for the money, and a lot of flat usable land, too. And as an added bonus, you get to hear the same train tracks Steve Jobs does – the Caltrain station is just a few short blocks away! Not to mention a number of cafes where you can get your daily coffee or 15. In a subtle attempt to emphasize how much house you’re getting, the realtor included 9 vibrant photographs. Let’s have a look:

That’s what I call value for your money. One exposure, nine reasons why you should call Gilroy home! But wait – there must be some reason why the realtor is so amped up that his finger twitched nine times on the “post” button and forgot entirely to mention this is actually a legal duplex, address 345-355 W 8th St. People just don’t get this excited normally. Oh, what’s this?

The fastest flip in the West has competition! Or else the realtor’s head exploded and no one has bothered to remove the listing. Either way, you win at 345 W 8th St in Gilroy! Drive a little, save a lot!

Thanks to the sharp eye of Burbed reader SEA, we have found affordable housing in Palo Alto!  Thanks very much for calling out this place in comments.  Yes, sonarrat wrote this place up already.  I’m just adding some more context to the idea that you no longer have an excuse not to trade up to Gunn High School.

 

3980 El Camino Real #27, Palo Alto, CA 94306
$27,000

BEDS: 3
BATHS: 1
SQ. FT.: 602
$/SQ. FT.: $45
LOT SIZE: -
PROPERTY TYPE: Mobile Home (Single Wide), Room Addition
YEAR BUILT: 1964
COMMUNITY: Barron Park
COUNTY: Santa Clara
MLS#: 81116830
SOURCE: MLSListings
STATUS: Active
ON REDFIN: 140 days

Now you can afford Gunn High School for your teenagers and Palo Alto Unified for your smaller children! This home is much less to own than it costs to rent in Palo Alto School District! Move in and make it your own.

If you make it your own, you’ll fit right in here!  The owners of the park make their own spelling rules!

Yes, you can afford Gunn for your teenagers (plural) and Palo Alto Unified for your smaller children (plural).  You, your spouse, and your at least four children will delight in all 602 square feet of this expansive 3 bedroom, um, mobile home.  In a trailer park.  IN PALO ALTO.

I’m going to say this again.  Trailer park. In Palo Alto.  This is the real estate equivalent of a squeegee guy at the Ferrari dealership, or Jeff Foxworthy spilling beer on you at Bohemian Grove.

Did you ever think there were some properties that won’t gain value even with those amazing Palo Alto schools?  This is one of them.  140 days on the market, price reduced 4 times, and it’s still there for the taking. Part of the reason is the neighborhood, part of the reason is the neighbors, and most of the reason is you aren’t buying any land, you’re buying a tin box and the right to pay monthly rent to keep it in PALO ALTO.

Here’s what you need to know about this place.

Mobile Home Information

• Section 1 DOH/HUD Number: GBG1040CK
• Leased Land
• Unit Will Remain
• Space Rent: $650
• Manufacturer’s ID Number: Mayflowe
• License Fee: $66
• License Renewal Date: 2012-04-30
• License Expiration Date: 2012-04-30
• License Decal Number: EJ4778

That rent seems kind of low for Palo Alto, actually.  I’m sure the park owner’s agent will be delighted to negotiate a new (read: more expensive) rental agreement with you, after you close on the cargo container and have the option of either loving it or lugging it to any other trailer park in Palo Alto willing to take you at the rent you’re willing to pay.

Remember those arguments you would have as kids, like whether Superman could defeat Captain America, or if  the 1978 New York Yankees could beat the 1976 New York Islanders, or if an irresistible force could shift an immovable object or which would you rather do, be staked on a fire ant hill or have all your toes cut off with a rusty soda can?

This is the grown-up version of those questions.  Does the awesomeness of Palo Alto jack the price up, or does the loserdom of trailer park smash the price down?  How much is this sardine can going to finally sell for?

Burbed hasn’t done many mobile homes. In fact, last time we did one, the owner of the property requested the article be yanked. So we haven’t had lots of discussion on the many issues in buying a house on leased land, but check out the comments on that thread for some of them.  And here’s a brief history of this particular mobile home park.

The door of opportunity is OPEN! So move in and make it your own.